8:27:30 PM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What's up?

It's a full moon out. . . I can tell I'm going to blow the doors off of this place when I Chant tonight.

I FINALLY biked to school again. Wow I love that so much. Then we had like a party in my office with my CGM team and basically got burned. I scheduled two meeting today, and we are wrong on so much and need to redo a lot. Course it was nothing I did so I felt like a fool asking to get something to work on . . . we are meeting again tomorrow.

Then I biked back to catch a Yoga class. First one there of course, so I had some time to chat with Cyn. . . first person I saw there too. She said it was a small class, but it was full when she started. She's tried to do two, and evidently didn't get enough students. I know how much that will change now of course. I almost made it to the Kundalini Class last night too. Oh well. Liz was nice and someone else I knew there gave me a big hug in greeting as Cyn did too. . . .

Hum I felt like I need to start my class there too. But I'll wait and see. Liz asked me about that once before, so it might be cool. No rush on anything now, I've got to just let things go where they will. I've got more than enough to do already and all the energy coming through is just getting stronger and stronger. . .

What about your intentions and directing all this energy?

yes I know that's my job, cause I can make more happen than most people ever even dream about . . . Hum sounds like I need to get down to business . . .

What about falling in Love? You've been talking about that for years, and more than ever in the last few months. . .

I know. So that will happen too. Sooner than I think even.

What do you want?

Oh forget that, I'm not playing that game again . . . I'm trying to take I easy with things, if I go answering that question AGAIN, NOW. . . then I know I'll have to be careful tomorrow and keep my eyes open. I really have a lot of things to do tomorrow already, and I've not done anything with the videos for a while so I really need to get busy with that too.

Yes but what about all this Power you bring up when your passions come out. You talk about all these intentions and moving all this power. But then the one thing you know will bring you more power than anything else you down play?

I get it, so You want me to get out more . . .

What about just allowing things to happen and sharing what you feel more freely. Like tonight with Cyn you got to the point really quickly, but you really didn't go anywhere with it. Actually in this case that was the best thing to do, but that's because you will see her again next week too. If you want to make more happen everywhere else you will need to grab it while you can...

Oh great, So I'm not "grabbing" enough or fast enough?

What do you think? Everyone you know asked about sex the moment you mentioned meeting someone. The truth and passion was so thick and clear to everyone, but you. Course if you meet someone who talks about being fertile, then it seems like there is something wrong with you for not having sex. Do you need a written invitation or something?

Oh give me a break. I never have sex, well sure I do playing around with my lover sneaking a quickie. . . lol . . . but to meet someone and just get into sex right away still is kinda freaky to me. I guess it's possible with the right connections, and sometimes things just happen. But to have that state of mind is not something I can deal with now.

yes but What about the power and focus you can have with it?

Oh I get it now . . . people are focused and centered on something that I know better than anything. . .

Now you are thinking. . . What have you known about this?

Oh all the roman kings and rulers had these big harems to build up their power before battle. It was just something that we understood and used to bring more power. . . lol, Like I need anymore?

What it is though is getting the right attitude and using the power you already have. If you are conscious about all these things you do and know how to make things happen . . . then it is really about time you did it a bit more.

I know what you mean . . . there are still too many things I let slide. I always feel and see things happening all around me, where I know I can let out some spontaneous insight to change and shape it. I get what I need to be doing more. . . I just need to get totally free in Your Spirit and let things happen more. . .

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Please fill me with Your Strength, Love and Wisdom for the Glory of God; Our Father Son and Holy Spirit!
Amen

Valentine's Day - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

YEAY!!! My Blog This Button works again!!! I think???

Valentine's Day - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia: "February fertility festivals

In Guerber's passage on the worship of Vali: 'Vali is god of eternal light, as Vidar is of imperishable matter; and as beams of light were often called arrows, he is always represented and worshipped as an archer. For that reason his month in Norwegian calendars is designated by the sign of the bow, and is called Lios-beri, the light-bringing. As it falls between the middle of January and of February, the early Christians in efforts to stop the Germanic tribes from celebrating their rituals, dedicated this month to St. Valentine, who was also a skillful archer, and was said, like Vali, to be the harbinger of brighter days, the awakener of tender sentiments, and the patron of all lovers.'

The association of the middle of February with love and fertility dates to ancient times. On the ancient Athens calendar, the period between mid-January and mid-February was the month of Gamelion, dedicated to the sacred marriage of Zeus and Hera.

In Ancient Rome, February 15 was Lupercalia. Plutarch wrote:

Lupercalia, of which many write that it was anciently celebrated by shepherds, and has also some connection with the Arcadian Lycaea. At this time many of the noble youths and of the magistrates run up and down through the city naked, for sport and laughter striking those they meet with"

Movies

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you feel now?

I know feeling, feeling and more feeling... I have all this intense power around me. I can feel so much that is really kinda neat. I know I should be free and clear about it all and who cares what gory details I see and feel . . .

If you could live this life over, Eric, would you still want there to be the same challenges?

Loaded question, huh?

Yeah, you cherry-picked each and every one. And you knew exactly what you were doing.

In awe of you -
The Universe


Thoughts become things... choose the good ones! ®
© www.tut.com ®

Kind of like you were at Macy's, on rollerblades, Eric.

I ran across some filmmakers competition for the Gasparilla. I guess they have so much fun and success with the Art Festival so why not make it for film too. So I signed up as a volunteer and sent something out to Dave. Of course he wants to make a High-Def little short for it. And asked me about a script or something . . . then he started talking about how he tried a hundred careers and degrees before finding something that could express his passion. . . .

Funny, I started with a hundred passions and am now creating a career and degree to match my favorite. Like what's the point in doing anything if we don't enjoy it. It's really kinda funny how backwards people are.

What else did you do on these lines. . . ?

Oh Mike saw the "What the Bleep" movie and agreed how his article referred to some similar ideas. But then he was very clear about how the being there or not there stuff was just a little bit too far out there and really is BS to him. So I told him how it's really possible to experience exactly as they described but it takes efforts to practice the skills. Not simply easy stuff. Like learning anything else if you take the time to practice and work at it, you can do anything. . .

Sure then he told me about the Million Dollar challenge from the James Randi Educational Foundation

What did you do?

I went and wrote them of course. Reading a bit on their site, I just started laughing. They are searching for the "para-normal" proof . . . . lol . . . oh sure, if my middle name wasn't synchronicity it would have to be paranormal. I mean, all my life I've seen and played with this stuff. . . Heck if someone wants to see some paranormal stuff, then all they need to do is try to spend a week with me. . . lol. . . just try to keep up for one week!

Course that's what I thought with Mike too. We could do anything he wanted to do. Learn how to bend spoons or move objects, or whatever . . . wanna play with manifesting something. He's the skeptic to the end. So I realized how cool it would be for us to pick something to learn and do it together. Where two or three have gathered together in My name

What did you feel now?

Oh It would just be more power and control than ever . . . it's so funny, I always feel like I run circles around all this stuff. Like telling Mike the movie was all old news, all things I've done or seen already. It's really funny, once in a while I meet someone who really knows I can see right through them. They relate and understand something about me and recognize there is really no point to it. Who cares who really knows or not, what matters is what we do with our knowledge whether we hide under a rock because so and so says you should or whether you get out and do your thing.

Too many people hide, and don't even know it. They have the TV on and listen to all this psycho-drama in the world pretending not to notice as they eat a Big Mac with a Coke. But the truth is the pollution they eat enhanced by the pollution they watch and listen to all is designed to make them brain-dead anyway. So the more they pretend nothing is wrong or nothing can affect them, the more their brains turn to mush and they loose touch with all the truth.

What did you feel with this?

I know I share so much with people. And once in a while someone listens. Some times people come along who really listen and understand me. It seems to happen so briefly for the most part; but it does happen some times. So I shine a light into this dark cavern surrounded by all this psycho-drama that they are slowly sinking into. I open up and reach out, and some times people hang on for a while or are inspired to reach out. But then often people go as fast as they come into me. I share what I can and hope and pray for them, but then they are off again to get lost. . . Oh well I tried. Nothing I can do now!

It's kinda neat when I see people return to me again and again over the years. Sharing insights and growth as if I'm there with them all along. It's all cool. No fear, No worries for me. . .

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Please Lead and Love all those I meet, Bring them light and truth to grow into Your Light, For the Glory of God Our Father Son and Holy Ghost, Amen!

Monday January 29, 2007

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

Monday January 29, 2007
Yesterday | TODAY | Tomorrow

Today's Outlook for

The Gemini Moon's tense opposition with dark Pluto today sets up a situation where a slight deviation from the acceptable script can send the whole relationship up in smoke. Conflict is short-lived, for the Moon enters her home sign of emotionally sensitive Cancer at 5:15 pm EST. We may brood now, fearfully withdrawing from the world. Even if we are anxious, it's not healthy to stay safely tucked behind our castle walls where no one can reach us.

Subject: TUT... A Note from the Universe
Did you know, Eric, that the average person looks 793.7% more attractive when they smile? Not to mention healthier, wiser, slimmer, richer, and cooler.

They do.

And smiles "become things" too -
The Universe

Let's ROCK, Gorgeous!

© www.tut.com ®

Add your saunter to the equation, Eric... and you best be careful where you walk that puppy.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Kirtan

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What happened now?

I did a Kirtan again, and I really went into orbit. I must have done all these things a million times, or wrote them and created them a million years ago . . . I hear these words and sounds. Then I start trying to do them . . . and they end up taking over. My breathe goes in and out to the rhythm and my whole being reverberates to the sounds. I could feel the building moving to our tones. And the light and power just came right through me. . . wow. . .

What else, come on. . .

Oh Cyn was sitting next to me! Still no ring on her finger! I remembered our first class together where she was saying how I connected to spirit deep in meditation through her class. So here in Kirtan I was totally fearless, she knew about it all already. . . . so off I went! I really didn't know anyone else, or really care . . . so it was really great. She clearly enjoyed it too . . . lol . . . I could feel a few others riding our tails too . . . lol . . . that's so cool when it just happens.

What else?

I knew Maggie was happy to see me there again too. Liz was polite and nice greeting me too. No one has bought the property next door yet. So Maybe I need to! Course Dave and Laura both asked me about investing again last week . . . and I got an email from the VC, or two! So I know I really need to get busy on all these things again. . . lol . . . I get distracted a little bit, but everything comes through to me anyway.

What else did you learn . . . ?

Oh it was the Mayan Calendar stuff, it's all about connecting to NOW so I'm back on Tolle again! Connecting all the dots in my life. Today the Mayan Astrologer from Atlanta sat next to me in Church. So I gave her a Chant card saying we need to trade some lessons. She was thrilled, "synchronicity" she said . . . didn't admit that was my middle name.

What else do you need to do?

I need to get to sleep . . . and start riding my bike to school again!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

5:09:36 PM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

I need to admit, I'm pissed. Lyn called and with no warning, no reasoning, no justifications, no discretion or kindness simply to say "BYE," nothing, no more, never! It felt like another person talking. I asked if she was at work and she admitted she stepped out to call me. But it was certainly the professional Lyn pulling some deal and doing whatever she had to do to get her way. I already said how it felt like a lie and more like something she did to appease her mom and make whatever "final efforts" she could make with her "ex" all alone without some outside influence à ME!

Sure she knows I can do anything so she expected me to write her and certainly expects that I will understand "whatever," whenever she comes back . . . if that's what she plans to do when the "ex" turkey fumbles again. I mean she told me he has gone 6 months with no contact with Ciera. WOW! I remember when colleen first moved out and never told me where she went or anything. I went like 3 days with no contact with Emily and Christopher and I was nearly ballistic. Course now not seeing them is completely different. They are teenagers now, not little kids like they were back then. I mean Chris was at least 6 years old, NOT 3!

What else do you feel now?

I keep getting her buzzing into me too . . . I try to keep her out but she sneaks in through her daughter or something else that inspires thoughts of her again. It's really weird. When I first noticed Ciera there in a chant with me, it was like she had followed her mom in. Then I thought it was more her daughter pushing things and needing to learn my rituals anyway. Now when I sense Ciera coming in, I welcome her and love her knowing her mom is struggling with crap so no one is taking care of her again.

But then I noticed her mom was sneaking in behind her. And when I caught her on it she started all this "using her daughter" crap. I wont talk to her at all, and just brush her off. Course her daughter knows who loves her, and knows what is real better than anyone else. I don't have to tell her daughter anything at all.

Shit but that's my problem I never told my kids anything. Or I let them get lost on their own. . .

What do you mean about this?

I'm really not sure. I told my kids exactly what was happening, and what paul would do and everything. But of course he knew I told them too, so it's "not abuse; it feels good doesn't it?" I mean satan is always out there. Funny I know I need to forgive and bring him into me too. That's why spirits run from me. Everything gets bought back into God, and taken up the Heaven through this Temple I create. . . WE CREATE!

No, you were right, you create it. It only can happen there on Earth so we need you to create it all. What else do you need to tell Ciera?

I guess I want to tell Ciera how easily her mom can get lost. Not easy dealing with all this crap after me . . . lol . . . afraid of me, hiding from me… So it's really important that Ciera tell her mom what she wants and needs . . . what she likes and doesn’t like. Oh and of course I need to make sure they both know how to use the Power of The Word. I mean anyone can say the Name Jesus . . . BUT only ONE can answer to the Name Jesus. So if they are going to pray and ask for the Guidance of God, they need to be sure they hear only the truth. Not just claiming to be Jesus, anyone can say any name, but to actually answer our heart's call to Jesus Christ in love is something only Jesus Christ can do! That's what the gift of the Holy Spirit is all about, the Love of Jesus is a very real tangible thing that we can see and feel . . . IF WE WANT TO!! And all kinds of Spirits and things can pretend the feelings, and claim to be Jehovah, Babaji, Jesus or whoever . . . BUT only ONE can answer to our heart's call to Jesus Christ in love!!!!

What about your kids, how is that related?

I KNOW, they learned to trust adults. Mistake! Then they were also mislead so easily, trusting the simple definitions of words too. With a big slurpy in their hands it was easy to touch and feel what is good or not. We are only people, so of course we'll respond to getting touched. So they were told how it couldn't be "child abuse" since "abuse" is about pain and everything he did with them felt "good." So let's keep a secret from foolish dad who thinks he knows all about abuse and feeling good. . . . while we feel good!

What about the Power of the Word!

I guess I might not have made that so clear to my kids. While this time I can make it very clear to Ciera and her mom.

8.53pm What do you think now?

I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I've not been to Kirtan in years, nor to the Treehouse. So the power of the sounds sent me into orbit and Cyn was there. She's not been to a Kirtan in years either evidently.

Course she sat next to me stretching every little piece of everything I ever could dream to stretch on her. When I saw the schedule today at www.Treehouseyoga.com and I thought about going back to the classes there again, heck they are paid for at least the next year. Suzan actually invited me to Kirtan at church today too. She announced it to everyone else too, so everyone was invited. But then today when I thought of going, I immediately saw Ciera and her mom coming in and Ciera running to jump in my arms. I felt the same thing about church this morning.

What's wrong with that?

I really don't know if there is anything wrong with it or not. But I almost had to force myself to go … writing the above until the last minute. I promised myself I would leave at 6pm, and only left the PC after 6pm.

What was the problem going?

It felt like it was only to meet Ciera and her mom . . . not something for me but more something for you . . .

Why do we have to force you to do what's best for you anyway?

I don't know, sometimes I feel so stupid. Like I always know You are with me and everything will always be the best it could be for me.

What's bothering you?

I feel sorry for Ciera . . . and her mom too. I know they could really be happy here.

What about Cyn?

I'm sure she would be as well.

So what's the problem? Are you limiting yourself again?

I don't want to go there.

What's wrong with the Truth about Who You ARE?

I know I know, so I get to play daddy forever . . . to anyone and everyone . . . just what I always wanted!

What else?

I love you dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ for all your Strength Love and Wisdom; Please Guide me to Fulfill Your Will for the Glory of God, Our Father, Son and Holy Ghosts! Amen

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

What's a six mean for you?

11.42am
Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you feel now? with these 7 Day of Bliss?

I don't know . . . too much power still. I mean it was only 7 days. You created all of Heaven and Earth in 7 days while this feels like I'm providing flight training again. . . lol. . .

It's only when we choose and ask ONLY to Hear YOUR WORD: The True Word of Jesus Christ can we ever find the True Way to God. Where the NAME "Jesus Christ" bring forth this power in the WORD! The One and only Name that no one else can answer to. The Final word of God directly The Way!

The Word. This name corresponds to the Greek name Logos, and to the Latin name Verbum (Spanish Verbo); it is said of Jesus Christ, the Son and eternal Word of God; He is the Word that God "says," and through whom everything was done: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God... All things were made through Him... and the Word became flesh and dwelt among us (John 1:1, 3, 14).

Connecting with God and telepathy are very related and strong manifestations that should NOT be based in one person, saint, angel or any specific technique. Once you get conscious and create connections it should be totally YOUR SPACE and never involve anyone else - - - UNLESS you bring them in - - INTENTIONALLY!

This is all about a conscious relationship with GOD, nothing else. The telepathy is like fridge benefits as their and hundreds of others with such A Relationship.... focus on the Unconditional Love not the Fruits of the Spirit which can be distracting and lead you back into materialism....

And it MUST be centered on Christ, or always should be... Jesus Said; "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." This is actually the first link above ....

But the point is to USE THE NAME!!! If you hear something in your heard or heart ASK ONLY for it to be from CHRIST - - - and all this other crap will dissolve. I mean it is a serious power - - like a Magic Word. DEMAND ONLY JESUS CHRIST, and watch things clear up... seriously DEMAND IT!!!

I mean "valley of the shadow of death" stuff has been in my face and head before so thick and strong that people would go crazy - - - and I would CHANT OUT LOAD "I Love You Lard Jesus Christ" over and over again . . . . lol... adding "Thank You Lord Jesus" once in a while and watch all the crap vanish ... Course after my Motorcycle Accident in NJ, I chanted this for weeks...

Now I still use it just to clear my head too... It's a powerful intention and if you are there you need to control and use it. The Name is the trick. And You will KNOW and feel when a Voice accepts and answers to The Name - - but be careful as anything can pretend - - But ONLY GOD: Father Son and Holy Spirit will say YES repeating the NAME of Jesus Christ for you in the peace and comfort of your heart.... You can feel it and know when You are ONLY IN TRUTH!!

!I guess it might help to study the numbers a bit more . . . lol . . . who knows . . .

1st 9/24/2006 7pm-12am Met, dinner
2nd 12/14/2006 12-1:30pm Thia lunch
3rd 12/22/2006 12-4:30pm Picnic in Lake Park
4th 1/4/2007 12-2pm My house for lunch
5th 1/7/2007 3pm-11pm Ciera cooks
6th 1/12/2007 12-1:30pm Wonderful Brother
7th 1/14/2007 1-11pm Our Ciera

1 9 24 2006 7 12
2 12 14 2006 12 1 30
3 12 22 2006 12 4 30
4 1 4 2007 12 2
1 7 2007 3 11
1 12 2007 12 1 30
7 1 14 2007 1 11 = 33 = 6


Create Your Own

Great 2 sevens, 1+5=6, 4+2=6, and another 7 . . . 3 sevens and twelve, 3 sevens and a 1+2=3 . . . eek or thirty three . . . double eek, or just 6 . . . yes of course, I guess I better just leave this alone for a while longer . . . not something I need to concern myself with at this time . . . . Share Your Word, and let it BE; everyone makes their own choice to learn their own way.

Ask and receive, otherwise . . . get stuck!!! lol . . . oh, sorry it's not funny ;-/
Reminds me of Equan = = Have Faith in Our Convictions!

Wow; and if you can really read this other language of numbers . . . like with just looking at the dates 2, 4 another 4 more 2's . . . a 4 and then POW a big 7 . . . . another 2 and 4 . . . . lol . . . Wonder what happened with the Big 7 then . . . hum, maybe I should just post that . . . wow . . . Hum, it was really only 7 days, no more, no less . . . guess You created all of Heaven and Earth in 7 days so who knows whether it's done or barely beginning . . . not my problem for now, I guess So Be IT!

Oh and of course I need to make sure you know how to use the Power of The Word. I mean anyone can say the Name Jesus . . . BUT only ONE can answer to the Name Jesus. So if you are going to pray and ask for the Guidance of God, be sure you hear only the truth. Not just "claiming" to be Jesus, anyone can say any name (I said people who get close to me are attacked and will be conned...), but to actually answer our heart's call to Jesus Christ in love is something only Jesus Christ can do!

That's what the gift of the Holy Spirit is all about, the Love of Jesus is a very real tangible thing that we can see and feel . . . IF WE WANT TO!! And all kinds of Spirits and things can pretend the feelings, and claim to be Jehovah, Babaji, Jesus or whoever . . . BUT only ONE can answer to our heart's call to Jesus Christ in love!!!! SO MAKE SURE in prayer that only Christ Answers you!!!! That why I Chant "I Love You Lord Jesus, Thank You Lord Jesus Christ" over and over, only the One True Voice of God can come through it...

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ, THANKS Amen!
wow, all the 6's and 7's here. . . I wonder 6+7=13

You have no idea how much peace and joy it BRINGS ME to share this all with you... Trust your heart, and always keep it pure in the Light of Jesus Christ!

Find Your Bliss and Peace to share and express it EVERYWHERE. . . . don't worry about who can keep up with you or not. The birds always will and children as well... And if you flow in this Love and Beauty you will pump up so much Love around you that the rocks will start to sing for you ... lol... ;-xxoo

Forgiveness

1.04pm Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

Big word there... What's up?

I guess I need to clarify some things . . . a lot of things... lol... what's knew right! I realized I've been Journalling too much and not blogging enough, so I've got to go back and post all this stuff... mostly the recent stuff, all about forgiveness I guess. Hum, 4 months to the day, lol . . . 9/24-12/24 . . . the 24th is a favorite day of course since it's like Your Birthday Jesus, or at least the date we like to celebrate Your Birthday. . . lol . . . midnight the night before . . .

yea, but Why's that not up yet?

The events were very unique and very powerful, and I was inclined to keep them private, since I wasn't sure HOW MUCH power there really was, and I also needed to discern the truth and purpose a bit better. Hum, it was really only 7 days, no more, no less . . . guess You created everything in 7 days so who knows whether it's done or barely beginning . . . not my problem for now, I guess.

Why is that?

I cut the Silver Chord that tied me to it all. It was weird, lost like 50 pounds, felt all this freedom return with all this stuff falling away from me. It's funny as I regenerate Karma and energy all the time. I was really curious how so much got stuck on me. I also noticed in my next ritual all this tight stiffness in my back broke up and fell into the Earth too. Course I also caught something in my throat on 9/24 that I had worked all through in Red Tantra . . . lol . . . sorry long story, I'll add a link to the details when I add the Red from my journal to the White I had already posted . . . lol . . . and now it's back in my throat again. Hum, guess I should get into the Red some more . . . or maybe there is something more to this?

Yes, that's what we've been telling you all week. That first time in the Red you were very clear and strong about it. The desires and intention were powerful enough to process and clear anything. While now you are all wimpy in the Red, and don't seem to want to clear anything out. . .

I guess I can clear anything any time I want . . . hum which is why I need to post this new stuff I journalled about forgiveness. I mean I need to start clearing spaces for people and do more about what I do. . . I mean BEing a Temple to Connect Heaven and Earth is really cool, but I realize there is a lot more technique and details that I need to learn to utilize this more here.

What do you mean about that?

I know I can bring anything into the light and it's really easy to clear a space, forgive and bring resolution. Lol... I usually just walk into a place and I can feel all sorts running to hide. But that's not the same as clearing it out and getting everything into the Light. I mean, I never knew I could pick up people's Karma just by associating with them. Sure I can invite people into my space and sweep them clean of God only knows what. I've seen people come in loaded with tons of crap and about float there way out. But I've not done much about MAKING this happen. I guess it's more about my intention?

What else would it be Son? Everything comes back to your intentions. Like asking Chris what he saw, it's easy for you to do that all the time. And it happened because you unconsciously knew that's what he needed to see. However, when you don't feel what people need or want from you, then you really don't do anything for them. That's why DJ never has gotten anything for your rituals. You need to get your intentions stronger about making things happen instead of expecting others to carry the direction you need.

Yes I know, I need to come up with some procedure to clear a space and something more specific about helping people with their Karma or whatever. And this "unconscious" stuff; we all seem to do so much unconsciously and I wonder if that's what keeps connecting this Silver Chord, like it knows where it belongs whether anyone is conscious about it or not . . . Then I know I need to be more specific with people about the power that I bring in. Anyone who gets close to me will get so much more energy coming to them as well. Like not only will satan attack them more than ever, since he can't get near me any other way . . . but also I tend to attract all kinds of energy and people who have high energy needing to be and express more . . . like attracts like, and I can tell people about the population growth and thunder storms, but helping people who get close to me understand what that really means is so hard.

What it takes is only Your Intention! If you want to help people with Karma, then you decide that and you do it. Nothing about this is complicated. People will always understand only what they are ready for from you. You've already been through all the hard parts, you've just been coasting down hill. It's time for you to start peddling again, and really put some power behind it this time . . . When you get to the bottom and head up that other side the jump at the end will really send you out there . . . again! More so than you could imagine.

Oh great, so my Intention makes it happen, but I can't even imagine what will Really happen? That sounds a bit backwards or weird and out of place.

What you do with intention is set the purpose . . . that's like the direction . . . not your end destination. You can intend to clear a space, and blow out everything enough to send souls home and open new births and all the rest. Just clearing is the intention, but all the rest will fall into line based on everything involved beyond your intentions. The actual location and all the people and forces there will determine all the rest; yes like attracts like so the clearing and freedom you bring can open marvels, but if people there are lost in fear, it can bring their doom faster than ever as well.

I understand that. But then why do I need to know which Ascended Master Chris saw, or whatever.

When you create with intentions and call in specific powers aligned with your purpose, you can get a lot better results. Like anything else, with the specifics you can get at a more personal and applied solution. Remember your talk about dancing and people spilling their energy. Just because you created focus and direction for energy, you attracted all this "loose" energy to you. All energy is essentially positive and holy, it's just the purpose and intentions you put on it that sends it off. In the dance you describe you provide purpose to all this loose energy, so you absorb it. It's really the same principals. If you want a healing then you can ask for Raphael, if you want Strength and Protection then ask for Michael. Sure they can all heal and protect but just stick with the pro's, it'll be better for everyone that way.

I get it. So I need to get more specific on my intentions for all this that I'm doing.

What you did with the Affirmations was really perfect. And you can do that for clearing a space or lifting someone's Karma or anything. You can also let people figure out their own Karma, and simply send the energy they need to break it down manageably. Not everyone can blast things apart as you do.

I know, we fun, let me do all the blasting, Booms, Sparks and stuff . . . like I don't have anything else to do.

We went through a lot to get this all into you. And You went through a lot as well. That's really why nothing can mess with you. Not so much what you can do to others down there, but what you carry around undercover. NO worries, everything comes in time, and your time is anything you want it to be. . . still playing little college kid, look and act like it too, so enjoy it, there's always more and better coming if today's turn out weak and lost. . .

I don't know if I want to know anymore.

Yes, that's why you never like card reading or anything, some times you really don't need to know what you are capable of, and it comes through and happens very freely and easily for you . . . BECAUSE YOU ASKED! So Be It!

I know all in The Spirit Of Jesus Christ, For the Glory of God, our Father, Son and Holy Ghost!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Power

7.31am Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What's up?

I AM . . .lol . . . .
I am... i am that i am.... he he he he

Wisdom, what is wisdom?

Wisdom is understanding . . understanding how things are discernible . . . to bring out the Truth in Judgment and experience . . .

As experience, Wisdom is really a function of experience. People who have been there know the way back. It's something we know by trying and learning . . .

Now "Knowing" and knowledge is more concrete and mechanical. It's more like a formula or an equation, while Wisdom would be knowing how to use the equation, or how to manipulate it and modify it for specific applications....

So knowledge and wisdom are very close and applied together a lot . . . . Whenever I listen to the Spirit Rap I hear this phrase : "Wisdom to finish what Knowledge starts"

The knowledge and history of creation is recorded in our DNA, and it is through Wisdom that we bring it out and make things happen.

Cool stuff!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Dear Eric,
Here is your single's love horoscope
for Thursday, January 25:
The stars are all lined up and, if they've got anything to say about it, some pretty hot prospects are likely lining up for you. Set up some dates or fun out with friends immediately!

---

Permission, Eric, is what you give yourself.

I give you everything else.

The Universe

© www.tut.com ®

And there's no need to dally, Eric... your chariot awaits. Chariots, actually, your assistant here insisted you'd want one for every day of the week... Assistants, actually.

12:10:02 PM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

Ugh, I read the 1/23/07 stuff over and over again about her daughter . . . . OUR DAUGHTER . . . it is really just so cool and real. I love to read it over and over. Ciera is there sitting with me each time, laughing about it as if she were experiencing it again as I read it. I guess these kids coming through now are so strong and connected to things, they should really feel any time someone thinks or says there name anywhere. I mean it's ALL GOD anyway. So when I feel the love and joy that Ciera shared with me, I'm really loving her in God. And since she's in GOD all the more anyway, she likely knows and feels everything I do.

Kinda neato cool stuff. On Wednesday, September 27, 2006 I journalled about the Tantra connection with Lyn some more. It actually happened on 9/24 but I wrote about it more on the 27th. And now I realize that she broke it 1/23 and then I broke it 1/24. . . almost 4 months exactly to the minute.

AND NOW that bug in my throat is back. Like the piece of her that didn't fit right at the very beginning is back again caught in my throat. I wondered if it was her mom or john that was still caught in her and making me sick . . . then I thought it might be something that will leave me when she really leaves. Course so now I don't know if I want to get it out or keep it close. Lol. . . crazy world… Last night chanting again she wanted to get in and has tried a number of times. I've been tempted and got little tastes a few times, but I don't want to. Sure I can really love her and everything could really be incredible for us. But now it's more on my terms instead of hers. Shit there aint any man out there anywhere better for a child than me. And for a single lady with a child it's even harder to even get into a good relationship; let alone find someone great for the child too.

Yes I know all about Love and truth and all. But I also realize that the 2 months she dreamed about me made our next month really powerful. So if I give her another month off to find out what's real for herself . . . no sneaking out to visit me at night. Then she'll really be ready for anything then. I still wonder about blogging because I feel like she needs to read this about her daughter.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

last time.... BOOM!!!

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you think?

I don't know how long this will last this time.... but BOOM!!!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

10:36 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

Lyn called to say goodbye.

What does it feel like?

It feels like a lie.

Why?

It feels like someone else telling her what to do again . . . she's not following her own bliss.

What about us telling you what to do? Is that following your bliss?

I guess that's always what you do, but I can see the truth in it and the bliss behind it all. You force me to really look at what I want, and see it in another perspective, from Your Higher Place. I still CHOOSE to follow your Guidance in faith sometimes, but it is never opposed to my bliss or anything I really feel inside myself. I'm never guessing or "ASSUMING" that hurting myself or something will make things better somehow. That's the lie of religion and all the capitalism corruption; suffer now to be happy and retire later, that's total BS!

Why did you make this capitalization?

I guess I felt something that Lyn said about facing "her Karma." She assumes that's really the only way of dealing with it. Karma has a lot of aspects and elements that make it part of our lives. Forcing things that we "assume" are necessary for the sake of karma or some other myth is really only lying to ourselves. My Chant burns up Karma! Facing something because we call it "karma" is just an excuse to avoid the truth and finding what we need to really learn. I know her mom wants her back together with John. He's got lots of money and can support them all into oblivion. Lol ... weee funnn . . . It feels more like it's her mom's Karma with him that needs to be resolved not Lyn's at all.

What happened now?

10 am I went and chanted. I sent so much love and passion into Lyn that she about bounced in her seat at work. She resisted and tried to hold strong against me saying how she wanted to be cut loose. When I finished Kathy called me back. I called her as soon as I got off the phone with Lyn. Kathy told me about respecting Lyn's wishes and accepting what she needed from me. So I cut the silver chords to her right as Kathy spoke. It was really weird. Like so much fell away from me. Like my cold suddenly about disappeared, even Kathy noticed my voice changed on the phone.

Now I feel Ciera crying, she knows what's happened. John respecting and honoring Lyn or not will still do nothing for Ciera, she's three years old and it's obvious to me that no man has ever loved her or even noticed her . . . that's something that either is or it's not. You can't teach an old dog, new tricks. Lyn and John playing nice or pretending to be a real couple will never change anything for Ciera. Ciera needs real Love not some make believe fairy tail romance; lets pretend to avoid "failing" at some BS relationship that was never meant to be anyway.

Wow, and I sang my kids to sleep from birth . . . That's a real Father. . . The NICU nurses waited for me to come in after work for Emily, it was so real for them they would wait between shifts just to watch the little girl fall fast asleep. Fathers must be rare in Tampa. Chris even asked me to sing him to sleep still after a Boy Scouts meetings . . . lol… That fills me with so much joy and Love now knowing how "real love" can be, nothing to pretend or prove there. Even if they are lost now, that kinda Love lasts forever!

I guess all Loves have to go get lost and be set free before they can grow to be real enough to last forever. So whether Lyn sees or knows anything or everything . . . will really be her choice. I just hope it wont take years of Ciera suffering before she releases the lies and follows her own bliss instead of some lie about Karma or someone else's wishes for her . . . for Ciera's sake if nothing more.

What else do you feel?

I cut the chords and Lyn knows I did. At first she was glad, but now she seems to be searching for me again and again . . .

What are you doing?

I guess I'm just watching her. I know we could do anything together, and will only if she's ready. But this is something that she needs to do . . . whether it is a struggle and a fight for a few days, or weeks or years and life-times is really up to her. Forcing a square peg into a round whole is just not possible and really only hurts . . . always hurts. But everyone needs to do what they need to do. If she can't accept she made a mistake and simply move on, then she can suffer for the mistake over and over again until she forgives HERSELF. She doesn’t need to forgive him, she needs to forgive herself.

What else?

I feel all these other girls calling me. I've been locked in my office for too long. All these dreams and fantasies are bubbling up from everywhere around me. I can feel it . . . kinda makes me laugh and smile too. Thank You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ . . . Amen

7.30pm

Weird, very weird . . . she asked me to cut a silver chord that seemingly has been there forever. So I cut it, and cut it again and again. I mean serious, graphic, brutal, machete hacking, cut it up, desperate work cutting this giant tree trunk of a chord. At first I lost like 50 pounds, my throat cleared up and there was so much ease and balance in my tasks before me with my power and freedom returning again. Hum, I wonder when I first got sick whether it coincides with her mom coming to town, or something else she did or thought, guess I'll never know unless she reads this blog and comments to the posting about when I first said I was feeling sick.

Every memory and event that we shared; that I have held so dear; comes to my mind now and it would include this Chord getting attached again. Chop, chop, chop, it's getting easier now. I've been able to wave my hand and brush off her energy, the connection that I once savored, our private discussions through the ethers and enjoyed feels almost like poison now. No not nothing for her now, if she wants something, she can use the phone or do without. I mean, I know I can connect to anyone. I mean anytime I look at someone I can feel their energy patterns and emotions. I ALWAYS avoid this and never read into people much at all. I could feel every time she came back to connect, whether she did it consciously or not. There was a very clear difference from God and other Angels who normally guide me.

You felt a lot more than this. What else are you seeing?

It feels like She is forcing something to work that never was meant to work at the expense of a wonderful little girl who now sits at the point of no return. It feels like its all about ego, being right and making something work, instead of simply saying "oops I made a mistake." Ciera could be loved and blossom into her full potential or will she remain on the sidelines and become a causality of a dispute that can never be resolved. A sad loss for simply an ego that can't accept loss, like cutting off the nose to spite the face!

What do you mean?

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

10:35:45 PM

I always connect to kids. It's real and easy. They know it too. I enjoy it too instead of feeling some lost stranger that has no clue that they are constantly spilling their energy all over the place. A child recognizes me, like Lyn did the first time we met. It's obvious and clear we are connected and we both recognize it. Ciera knew she had met her match when we first met. It was funny here Sunday 1/7/07 after we biked all around and played in the river and drumming in the hammock. We went into my house and I got out Christopher's drawing set with all the colors and paints. I had set out a table in the living room again and got out paper for Ciera to draw and color while we were inside.

I started a bit with her, scribbling some colors but soon was off with Lyn in my office. We had so much to share as I've written about before. Course she did some belly dancing and aerobics, not letting me catch her with my camera . . . and then the three little steps we shared dancing in my office . . . too much power already . . . why do people have to fear the power of total bliss ? . . . Lol . . . So anyway after we sat in my circle and spontaneously got into a Tantra position . . . Ciera came in. "Oh look and see how I can break up all this paint into the floor."

OOPS, I forgot about Ciera. And she knew it too. She's been down this road all her life. But of course now she's met her match, NOW. Shit, I barely had anytime alone with her mom either, so I should have known . . . OBVIOUSLY, neither one of them has ever been Really Loved by a man, any man maybe. And so I should have had the sense to keep Ciera involved all along. Daaa! My fault, no problem, I can fix anything!

What did you do?

"Oh wow, are you hungry Ciera?" Course easy question there . . . and I stood up and picked her up in my arms walking out into the kitchen . . .

"So what do you like to eat for dinner?" . . . fish . . .

"Great, so can you help me cook some fish for dinner?"

Immediately Ciera was the center of attention again. I set her on the high office chair I have in there and rolled her up to the stove next to me. She was on her throne in charge of everything again. It was so cute. She was just beaming. The heck with making dinner, or helping in the kitchen, she was in charge, and she loved it. Everything was up to her, and she even had the master of the house escorting her around . . . lol, it was just so cute to see the expression on her face . . . So I rolled her up to the freezer.

"What kinda fish do you like best?" and I showed her this bag and that bag. Lol . . . obviously she never has cooked dinner before, nor has she ever had a choice about fish, she didn't really seem to even know there were different kinds of fish. . . . Not that it mattered of course, it was HER CHOICE! That's what was important she was making dinner! All the power and focus in the house was on her!

8:59:21 PM "In the name of Love, One man in the name of love… one man come on a barbed wired fence, one man he resist… In the name of Love, One man in the name of love… In the name of Love, One man in the name of love…"

Thank You Jesus, I'm here answering your questions for you, NO ONE ELSE….

Good go on with the fish.

So I think she saw a picture she liked and picked some fish to cook. I grabbed out the bag of veggies to go with it and she didn't care for that. "Oh that's ok, we need to roll you back over to the stove." It's so easy to distract kids with love, I guess it's something about my truth and sincerity that they can feel and know, that is what makes it so easy for me . . . lol . . . no big deal if you are conscious and for real . . . lol . . .

Because I have the time of my life… I never felt this way before, and I sware it's the truth, and owe it all to you… Club .977

I know thanks Jesus Chirst, you are just so good to me…

Yes good, What happened next?

I started the stove and dropped the frozen fish into the pan. Then I told her she needed to turn it and asked her what she wanted to use to cook the fish. I opened the drawer in front of her. She's on this "throne" . . . like it's a drafters working chair, up really high with a foot bar on the bottom and light-blue cushioned seat. She's about sitting up to the kitchen counter where everything there is just within her reach.

I realize now that her mom basically had no clue about this. She was all embarrassed about the broken paints and was sitting on the floor across the room meticulously picking up the tiny fragments of paint to fit them all back into the boxes they came in. Now Ciera is queen in charge of dinner and leading everything in the household so she grabbed out the biggest implement she could find in the drawer. It's funny how I feel the love and joy of this moment like it just happened a second ago. . .

Yes Son, exactly the point. Whenever you say to people that you connect and relate to children at another level, they really have no idea what you really mean. The Nurses in the NICU know, and will remember you in their death beds. What happened next?

I get it. Ciera raised up this big shiny whisk, she knew she found her scepter waving it at me like I was getting knighted . . . showing her approval for my efforts to show her how Life in Love is meant to be. "Oh, that's for making pancakes in the morning . . . hum, next time you visit and we can get up early to make something yummy and I can show you how it works . . . but now we need one of these flat – fish flipping – kinda things."

It was so cute, I really about chocked on this one. I glanced over at her mom to see if I put my foot in my mouth again. I'm too spontaneous some times, loves does that to you . . . She never noticed still face down into paint ground into the carpet . . . I was lucky. I guess I was luckier that Ciera knew what pancakes were and maybe even liked them so she could wait for that at another time, no problem. She then found a flat boring scepter and was happy to be trying to flip the fish.

9:22:17 PM "so in love with you" Janet Jackson "when I think of you" on Club 977 the 80's channel. Go on, what happened next. . .

I know I never wrote about this before, so to be there again in this is really kinda fun for me now. Though I'm trying not to even connect to Ciera who often would come into my Chant with Lyn riding the silver chords . . . though I realized today she was born about the time I said goodbye to Emily in court, realizing God wanted me to move on. . . accepting the Truth! So she might be more connected to me than Lyn even!

Oh so anyway Ciera was busy at work cooking fish. Flip, flip, flip, she was focused and clear about this. But then she flipped it out of the pan once and looked terrified like she's had her head chewed off before for being bad. "Opps, no biggie;" I laughed and put it back into the pot "It'll still taste great, cause you’re such a good cook" and dropped in spices and veggies and such for her to keep flipping. She was in charge, making dinner, all by herself. And she could do no wrong; which really was a surprise to her, all smiles ear to ear in total control loving ever second of it.

"Oh look into my eyes Ciera, you need to go slower now and be more careful. This is getting really hot and each time you flip you are splashing all over and that tiny drop that splashesd on you will really be hot and hurt a lot. I told you how this works and you need to listen to me and be more careful because once you get burned no one is going to be able to stop it from hurting. Yelling for your mom won't help you then, so please be careful."

I think her mom was about done then and told me I needed to get out a vacuum to get the last of the paint up from the carpet.

"Oh time to set the table."

"Ciera, do you think your mom can help you set the table?"

Wow, she jumped right off her throne. I thought she would want to eat up there or something. But that was cool she was ready to set the table, and maybe mom could help. But she knew how to do that already. She knew she was still in charge . . . that was just too cute too. Her mom could help her!

10:23 pm

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What else?

I never noticed how much I focus on children, and how much they respond to it. I remember walking into the river with her too. She wanted to get in the water. I thought I was just there to make sure she was safe. But really, it was all about her being alone with me. She just had to go back and check with her mom all the time, make sure she was ok too. I guess that was how I knew she never had any attention from a man. For Ciera to have my undivided attention was just a blessing. And she wanted to savor every moment of it, and was very determined too.

I remember now when they were leaving and they were singing to me in the car. They love singing car songs together, and it was just cute too. All three of us were in the front seat. And as I leaned my head onto Lyn's shoulder, listening and savoring the moment. Ciera put her head up against both of ours sitting in our laps. It was late and time for them to go. We were all saying goodbye. And the last thing Ciera said as we cuddled there together was that she wanted her daddy.

What do you think she saw for the first time there with her mom?

I guess having someone loving her as much as her mom was really special for her. And that's what "daddy's" are all about. Or at least what daddy's are supposed to do. I mean I can't imagine being away from Emily and Christopher for 6 months while they were babies. When they were babies it was never even a day, and usually less than 12 hours. I mean I ALWAYS sang them to sleep at night, so I guess I was never long away from them at all.

But a man who can live without a baby for 6 months is simply not a father. I mean it's like asking a dog to stand up and cook dinner. Some things are simply not meant to be. Dogs can't walk or talk. And if they have four legs and are all hairy, barking at the mailman, then chances are they are a dog. . . no point in asking the dog to cook dinner, no use in hoping for it someday or expecting it to ever happen . . . Like some man who could care less about time with a baby, it's just not in them. No point in discussing it. And who cares about later, those first years make everything for the child. And a man who claims they can play when the kid is older and can bike or hold a ball is total BS too. No patients and interests in a child simply never changes, with age or not. Can't teach an old dog new tricks . . . lol . . . not point in it.

Hum, I guess I never thought colleen would ever try to put our children to sleep at night either. And when she tried to and told me she wanted to I should have known there was something up. Course she spent hours trying and never could do it. I still laugh when I remember her reading and singing to them literally for hours, and finally giving up. And I walked in and barely finished the first verse and they were snoring not even minutes later. I guess hindsight is twenty-twenty. After 7 years of never caring to suddenly want to put a child to sleep should have been a clear sign to me that something underhanded was going on. I didn't know she wanted to get divorced. I had no clue, not even when I traded in the minivan for two Hondas. DAAA!

But now as I think of someone pretending to do something that never has been possible before . . . . it's just a scam! 7 years I sang them to sleep alone; and 5 years more after we divorced too. But I guess we would all like to believe our marriage is worth something. Like the young naive event that made incredible children should have some other value to it. Course now I wish I had taken everything about colleen to court the moment it happened. Sure hoping things got better and praying for people to be civilized and honor their word . . . what a joke! It only hurt my children. I never should have trusted colleen, she still has never done anything for these kids except carry them for 9 months . . . the rest will be painful and result in years of therapy!

What else do you feel. . .

I feel sad. I wanna cry for another poor child lost to selfishness and materialism. But you know. I can only do what I do. People will choose to suffer or will choose to find their bliss. I can share my knowledge and experience for you to learn or you can suffer on your own and learn for yourself. People will believe lies or find their truth deep inside. Like I've told so many people that get close to me to be careful, they WILL be attacked, lied to and deceived. Like Emily and Christopher knew how to call Your Name Jesus Christ into all situations to discern the truth. They learned the Power of Your Name. And still when someone else told them otherwise, after giving them a big slurpy and a candy bar; they decided to listen to whatever voice they wanted to listen to. Our heads and hearts are always filled with voices and powers from all creation.

It's only when we choose and ask ONLY to Hear the WORD of Jesus Christ can we ever find the True Way to God. The NAME Jesus brings forth this power in the WORD. Sure lots of words and names work, but if they are true and holy, they will always stand strong within the Name of Jesus . . . that's the power of the Christos energy . . . while all the fake crap suddenly vanishes when calling for His Name!

The Word. This name corresponds to the Greek name Logos, and to the Latin name Verbum (Spanish Verbo); it is said of Jesus Christ, the Son and eternal Word of God; He is the Word that God "says," and through whom everything was done: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God... All things were made through Him... and the Word became flesh and dwelt among us (John 1:1, 3, 14).

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

TUT... A Note from the Universe
I'm alright with the concept of Karma as it's generally understood, Eric, kind-of, sort-of.

The idea of spiritual contracts is pretty nifty, too. You've always been a wheeler-dealer.

Except, of course, if either were laws, you wouldn't be unlimited.

Not even a little.

Oh well, they were cute ideas for awhile.

The Universe



Karma, destiny, or the power-to-have-it-all, Eric?

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

2:01:22 PM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

Ugh, what did I do to deserve these numbers all like that??

What did you do?

I got a nothing note from Lyn, where she said not this week and that was it. So I wrote her back and didn't even want to send it. As I drove home from school she came in and asked me about it through the ethers again.

What's wrong with that?

I just wrote her about that too. Or I sent what I wrote before adding at the end:
PS. If God needed us only etheric now, we never would have met!

Why do you second guess what we "need?"

FINE, so "I NEED". . . It's me who's down here doing the "DO" so yes it's really me who needs to be loved. Is that too much to ask?

What's wrong with making that statement yourself?

Nothing at all, except I have made it a thousand times already. . . .

What do you mean by that? We've seen you asking all sorts of things here, wanting and needing this or that. But nothing so specific.

I need to Hug and Kiss Lyn at least ONCE A DAY! I NEED to be able to talk and share with her spontaneously for at LEAST a few hours each week, and MUST have at LEAST one day each month to just be together. I would prefer having a few hours each day and at least a full day once a week. . . . but I really just want her around me ALL THE TIME!

What was so hard about that?

I guess nothing much at all.

Why don't you tell her that?

I'm not going to be so pushy and demanding. It's not something that I can do that easily. I'm trying to respect her boundaries and honor her wishes to do and be what she needs to.

What makes you think she doesn't need the man of her dreams to chase her down?

I guess I don't really know if that's what she needs or not. But I know I can't stand waiting another week to see her. I mean last weekend it was "our daughter" to "not this week" twice in a row . . . HELLO, that's crazy kinda changes that I can't handle too easily. . . nothing that makes any sense for me at all.

I mean from "our daughter" to no time with "work commitments and personal obligations" … that's really getting out of hand a bit. Not sure what she's used to out in the ethers, but for little men here on Earth it's really never going to be that easy. Course I waited two months before I even tried to contact her. Then we had lunch and planned a 2nd. Since then we've done a lot, and I know her mom is here in town now, so I can give her a break. But I'm still only human, and her short little nothing messages from work are really a drag.

Course sometimes I feel like I'm really crazy or fanatical about some things. Sure she's a smart sexy babe, but she's 7 years younger and still learning lots spiritually all the time. Sometimes I feel like a know-it-all, but "still learning" is really where we should all be. Now I've convinced myself I could go get her a Rose and take it to her as she's leaving her office. I'm sure I can pull it off. I'm sure she never leaves the place until 5pm. And I really don't even want to kiss her since I'm not feeling so good. So it's not like I want to keep her from whatever else she has planned.

Please Loving Lord Jesus Christ Lead and Guide me through all my thoughts, words and Deeds tonight with Lyn. Thank You amen!

6:09:13 PM

Hum? Got a dozen roses, wanted to hand her one. Waited by her office for 30 minutes, freaked out the egg-head insurance ladies with nothing better to do, but then just left the flower on her car. I guess I got there 15 minutes early and hung till about 5:30pm. I was hoping I'd at least get a phone call by now. Oh well? Guess I should eat and get busy with reading something. I want to bring her another Rose tomorrow, and then again, until I'm out of roses or she shows up here to get the rest. . . . it's silly, but feels good gets my vibrations up higher!!!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

neato

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

* Aztec Astrology Report

(Copyright © One Reed Publications, 2006) www.onereed.com
Prepared for Eric born May 16,
DAY-SIGN: 11-Water (Maya: 11-Muluc)
YEAR: East -5 (Tikal System)
13-DAY PERIOD: 1-Rain (Maya: 1-Cauac)
NIGHT LORD: 6

VENUS PHASE: Evening Star

Introduction - The Astrology of Time

The ancient Maya and Aztec astrologers studied the mysterious influence of the rhythms of the sky on earthly life. Everyone knows the Sun rises and sets every day -- this is the basic rhythm of life around which we set our clocks and calendars. What the ancient astrologers discovered was that other time cycles existed that were multiples of this basic day cycle. This fact was discovered about 100 years ago in Europe and these cycles (there are many of them) are now called biorhythms.

The most important time cycles in ancient Mayan and Aztec astrology are those of the day, 9-days, 13-days, and 20-days. Additionally, years are counted also, in groups of 4 and 13. Each day is then part of several other cycles, so no two days are exactly the same. Your Maya/Aztec horoscope below shows exactly where in each of the cycles you were born. Each category below examines a specific cycle and a specific aspect of your personality. Keep in mind that our personalities are complex and contain many contradictions. All of us present a different "face" depending on who we meet. The delineations below will reflect this, but they will also give you a clear picture of who you really are. The true value of astrology lies in self-knowledge, the first step to wisdom.

Your Most Personal Traits -- The Day-Sign of Your Birth

Here are your strongest and most obvious personality traits. The delineation below describes who you are and how you appear to others, at least on the surface. In Aztec astrology this part of is your horoscope is your Tonalli, or Day-Sign, the form bestowed upon you by the Sun.

Water: You have very strong emotions and feelings that are easily aroused. Sometimes these feelings are so deep and so intense that they can take over your personality. You have very strong territorial drives that often operate openly with little conscious resistance. At your worst you may display compulsive and addictive behaviors, including abuse of power, sexual obsessions, drinking, and use of drugs. On the positive level these emotional drives cam lead you into deep commitments and persistence in achieving goals. Whichever way your emotions lead you probably has much to do with your early childhood experiences.

It is very possible that you have psychic abilities, or have an interest in psychic phenomena. Undoubtedly this is something that stems from your unusually strong feelings and reactions to things. Many Water personalities become artists who produce sounds and colors from their souls, not superficial illustrators or imitators. Even if you are not an artist you probably have a vision that you will attempt to realize during the course of your life. Whether psychic, artist or visionary, you are driven by forces that most people have no idea even exist.

You also have a need for recognition that is both a blessing and a curse. If circumstances allow you to exercise this part of your nature legitimately, as a performer or artist, then you are probably very successful. If circumstances work against you, then you could drift into an unrealistic or even potentially dangerous life-style.

You have an uncompromising quality that pushes you toward great success in career matters. You are an extremist and do nothing halfway, yet this is often what it takes to be at the top of a profession. You have a strong, independent mind and are capable, and very willing, to solve your problems by yourself. Although you may have some initial problems handling responsibility, control over your powerful feelings will bring out the leader in you.

You are likely to receive recognition for your accomplishments, whether these be positive or destructive. As you struggle to control, or at least monitor, the nearly uncontrollable urges surging within, you will undoubtedly achieve much. The important thing is that you channel your energies into constructive and productive area.

Your Deeper Self -- The 13-Day Week of Your Birth

Each of us reacts to the world around us in different ways. Our reactions are mostly unconscious; they represent what our deeper self needs. Our reactions both attract and repel us from things, people, and situations. What we like, what we like to do, and who we really are is shown by the 13-day week called the Trecena that we were born under. Each of these periods begins with the number 1 and the name of the day-sign that starts it. A number is attached to your position within the 13-day period that may be an important number for you. This is the eleventh day of the 13-day period beginning with 1-Rain. Beneath your surface personality lies a self that is very dependent on others. You have a strong need to feel that you belong -- to feel part of the family. You also have an independent streak in you that often causes you to spend time alone, or apart from others. In this respect, you contain many internal contradictions. Nurturing and caring for others is probably a major theme in your life. You tend to become deeply involved with your parents, in particular your mother.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Patents, Patents and More P. . .

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What's up?

I got some kinda bug or something. I'm sniffling and coughing, like yucko. Must have missed something REALLY IMPORTANT THIS WEEK. . . . lol. . . hint hint hint. . . lol . . . like something off balance. Guess it's been a few years since I've been sick. . . lol. . . once or twice a decade ain't bad so I can't complain. I got in bed late and woke up every few hours. I got Kathy out of her house, we went grocery shopping and then shared some fajitas. So anyway, really REALLY weird dreams last night. Almost freaked me out a bit. That really made it more weird than ever, being sick and all. I woke up ok and got up to eat something at a reasonable time.

I wanted to bike to school, but knew I wasn't feeling up for it. So I drove in a bit early and laid out in a sunshine before class. As my Venture Funding class started Sean asked if I wanted to present my patent. He had a dozen or so companies to present and thought mine would be a good addition to the mix. Each was at a different funding stage. I hadn't really prepared or planned anything but everything from my last presentation was still in my book bag.

I said how I presented a competition for UT and USF to write up a business plan, and we could do the funding for it. I kinda wasn't sure how we would pull it off anyway without the business plan all done, but then I passed out the sample the marketing company had done. I couldn't get the videos to work of course, but they had some good questions and I was done. Mit is in the class too, and presented his Computer company again. There were a few others that were interesting, but I didn't really care. It was just another grade for me.

Then we took a break and everyone was debating projects and teams. I went to my office to get some orange juice and peanuts. After I sat down again I noticed the girl next to me had a company and 4 team members already. So I told her to sign me up too, since I didn't think anyone would take my Bike Rack. Course she laughed as I spelled my name for her, since her name was Erica. Great, synchronicity is my middle name, sounds like a good way to start.

Oh then Mit's Team wanted to work on my Bike Rack. Oh cool. Course another team was working on his company but he didn't want to be on that team. I said I couldn't leave them hanging, if someone wants to help fund a company to sell my patent I better help them out. I recognized a few other people on the team too, bright kids I've seen in other classes with me.

It was kinda a surprise. I went and thanked Sean after class, cause I never would have thought anyone would pick it up. He said I might be surprised all semester long, so wait and see. So any way that really makes for an interesting semester. Might be a dozen kids working on making the bike rack a business. It was kinda funny as I was describing it. I basically needed a bike rack and nothing on the market worked fast and easy enough for me. Then I patented it since I wanted to learn how to patent. It was such a fast easy design, I figured the patent would be as well.

So cool. Course then Erica asked me if I knew someone who could draw up a patent for her . . . Oh sure, I charge $50 for a drawing, so I gave her my card too.

What are you so surprised about. Did you say you wanted to get everything done here so You could move on?

I sure want to be done, though moving on might not be the main point of it all. lol. . . well I guess finding my Bliss and Sharing that with someone is really what I need and want. That might mean moving on to somewhere else, or it might mean a hundred other things. It's really funny how things fall together kinda magically.

Son your desires and their fulfillment get closer and closer to being the same thing as you get more clear and specific about it all. Making affirmations about success with your patents and classes was very specific and relevant to exactly what you are doing now. Not some future, some dream or fantasy. Making it real is Your Choice, no one else's.

Oingo Boingo "Weird Science"

What makes your intentions so clear is YOU! Dreaming and wishing out into ethers is really a waste of time if you never reach out and grab whatever we send you and decide this is for you. The dreams and ethers go on forever, but making it happen here and now is really something that ONLY you can do. Sure we can guide and help and .... BEG! . . . but it's still only You with the power of Choice that makes it Your own.

I know I'm getting better at that and I know I can do it very clearly and strongly.

What you have done before has worked, stay with it and stay clear and strong. It's very easy to move power and create when You are sure of what You want, and are ready to reach out and accept your choices by the hand. Like you said before you made a commitment to finish what you started and it's all falling to your call. Trust it all, DO what you really want. . . NO FEAR!

I know I'm trying . . . but I never like forcing things or pushing too hard . . .

What does that mean? Do you think Issac and Jacob could have made it anywhere taking it easy? Sure be sensible and avoid forcing things if that seems more sensible and realistic. But OPEN YOUR EYES, when you see an opportunity and something opens up as clear as day . . . JUMP! Make it happen, maybe not force anything, but when someone is leaning your way a gentle push is needed some times. Course you can be a little TOO OBVIOUS and BLUNT some times, but the truth in your heart shines clearly for all to see. No worries Be Happy. . .

I know I know. I've been pushing things here and there. . .

yea, once in a while, trust your instincts more, if something seems open and obvious, don't hesitate to give a little push of encouragement. What happens might surprise you.

I know. Thank You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Please continue to lead and guide us to Your Fulfillment for the Glory of God, Our Father Son and Holy Ghost, Amen.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Impending Environmental Crisis

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word! 4.20pm

What's happening now?

I keep feeling this energy getting pumped up more and more. It's kinda weird as I feel things coming through so strong. Sometimes I will try not to take it so seriously or try not to pay any attention to it. And then I get an email . . . OF course I knew what I was feeling, she was reading and writing to me at the very same moment . . . I should have know! So I reply really quick, to share what I feel. . .

Some times I really gotta laugh about this. Like I work and study about whenever I want to so in the middle of the day I'll reach out ... and oh she's busy working on something . . . . SO WHAT!!! And I reach out and start feeling and dreaming and imagining all kinds of things. . . Oh sorry, got ya all wet again did I . . . GOOD! It's really kinda funny and I wonder about it sometimes, because I know the time never really matters, so I could be connecting now and she could be feeling it later when she's ready and open for me. Like we are both really sharing with the Divine aspects of each other, which are timeless so the energy can float through the ethers until . . . pow right in the kisser...

What do you mean about this?

I really don't know. Sometimes I wonder if she's writing me the moment I look for an email, and pop there it is. And then of course everything else lines up for me so clear and defined it's almost scary . . . like the song on the radio now "I know there's something going on" Friday on .977 The 80's Channel....

What else keep going on?

I know, like John sent me an email last week asking me to read some books.

From: John
Sent: Tuesday, January 16, 2007 10:14 AM
To: O&E Journal

Hi Eric,

I'll try to figure out a time for lunch or dinner.

Finish up your Independent Research. Find the two books by Eckhardt Tolle I mentioned and write about shifts in consciousness. Do a search on Tolle and consciousness so we can see what has been published in the research literature. I'll help you get started on the search if you want.

JJ/

And then I go back reading over my article to create a Outline for Dr Cohen, and here I find more about it all already in my article:

According to Eckhart Tolle, author of The Power of Now (New World Library), the positive energy you emanate will in itself also help protect you from the "negative mental-emotional force fields" of other people. The reason, he says, is that negative fields -- those created by fear, anger, depression and the like -- vibrate at a much lower frequency than positive ones, and the high frequency of positive chi is difficult to intrude upon.

“Whoever can free himself from achievement and from fame . . . will flow like Tao. He who has no power and no reputation is the perfect man: His boat is empty” (Bell, 2004a)

In Presence by Peter Senge they talk about the “Big U” for organizational change. Their research and ideas express the fundamental reality about how people can let go of all their old programming and connect to the Big Picture to solve problems similar to the Framebreak concepts (Mitroff, Mason, & Pearson, 1994). This includes a deeper more personal evaluation of all life’s priorities not only simplistic business decisions directed by the American Machine. One author described the experience more personally:

"I walked as quickly as I could to the train station, and from there I called home, but no one answered-the line was dead. I had no idea what might have happened, but by then I knew that it probably wasn't good. I boarded the train, and after the usual forty-five minute ride, I took a cab rather than wait for the bus to take me the last few miles home. It was the first time I'd ever taken a cab."

So I'm back with the same concepts again and again like we spoke about again today over sushi. Of course I tease him about how he never read the first paper I wrote him. . . and now he's asking me to expand into areas that I started on already. Ok so I know he's got some talent and clear spiritual connections for a lot of things, but this gets really spooky some times.

Why do you say that?

I know it's really nothing that surprises me . . . and I guess I tell people all the time how the time is running short. And I know I can make things happen better and faster than anyone alive . . . And I always have the best incentives alive . . . sending me sweet little love notes as I write these words now. Of course then I need to stop and reply . . . and reply for real this time sharing what I feel down deeper still . . . 4:45pm.

What did you write?

I asked her if she's ever been loved before. Like she doesn't know what that really means, or how a lady is supposed to be treated by a lover . . . I mean, most men will say anything it takes to get into a girls pants. It's kinda bizarre that ladies ever find a lover at all, since men say that so quickly it's barbaric. Howard Jones on the Radio NOW... "What is Love?" And then the ladies would respond with open arms . . . like that was their job description. Reminds me of High School where everyone was having sex all the time . . . . lol. . . but me! It was just another trick guys would learn to put another phone number in their black books. I remember when I first heard the word "Tantra" and started reading everything I could find, since it was all old news for me.

Then this one book talked about how men who played around a lot would age a lot quicker and lose their strength and power . . . lol . . . I always thought I was a little guy. I remember this one party in College. You know all the girls and the big jocks. And these two guys were trying to pump the keg up. I mean they were twice my size, or looked that way . . . and I couldn't figure out what they were doing. . . . both together working this little pump?

So when I could finally get myself another beer, I noticed the keg needed to be pumped up and just did it. They looked at me like I was superman, and I was sorta dumbfounded like it's no more than a stupid little tire pump for a bike . . . no big deal. Then I found out how the jocks who pump iron to get big and "sexy" all turn to flab as they age. They might keep their shape, but no strength or muscle tone . . .

I better get going . . . it's kinda late, for me to be in this office still . . . lol, like that makes any difference to me . . . Friday night and I'm bored to death, as usual. Yes I know, I have plenty of reading and writing I can do. . . . weee funnnn, Hum last note had no reply, feeling too much, being too blunt again. Oh Shit, that was her office email too!!!! God Please I hope she got that before she left or I could really be in the dog house!!!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

10:25:38 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What?

"I've been in love before, I've been in love before, I've been in love before" By Cutting Crew . . . "just one touch, just one move . . ." Yes Lyn, my sweet loveable baby; I can't be writing you Love letters every day . . . like I want to. I know you've dealt with more than your share of wacko men hungry for you. But you know what, so have I! While we are so much in tune with each other and each little thing we do and share is simply perfect. I can't wait until we can spend all of our time together!

I can really love you Lyn, I love everything about you, and each moment I see and think of you I feel closer and more love for you. Oh, and your daughter needs a little brother or sister. 3 years is a bit much for a gap between kids, so we need to get busy. Sure I know we've not know each other too long, but I also know we have known each other forever. And I know there is a lot more to come and share. Remember we earned this and deserve it.

Our passion and joy together will exceed everything we could ever imagine so we need to trust this feeling and instinct between us. The only thing of concern is the time we miss, since the joy we might have shared yesterday can never be again. We need to get together to find out what we are capable of and where we will go next . . . it's our dream that we share together in peace and joy, so let's just love it NOW!

Peace and joy be with you my love and thank you so much for being YOU and holding on to all the dreams and passions that make you so AWESOME!!! Now let's share this more, right NOW!

Thank You Loving Lord Jesus Christ for giving us this moment to share in Your Peace and Love for the Glory of God, Father, Son and Holy Ghost, Amen.

5:05:47 PM

She sent me a little prayer from work. Then responded to a text message on my phone. Quick simple little notes, which just made me smile, big and happy. I get so much energy from her, and feel so much power and passion in everything that we share. He mother came into town today. Now I wonder how soon she will introduce us. That will be a big sign about how serious she wants to get with me. But then I've been developing a sour throat and am about ready for bed now after some chicken soup and orange juice.

Kathy called now too. She's convince Lyn's mom knows all about me already, and thinks she'll be watching Ciera and all but pushing Lyn to get some intimate time alone with me. She's not in a long time, and evidently not enjoyed it in an even longer time. I guess I've been feeling this from Lyn too. Not about her mom, but that she's been thinking more and more about getting that private time we want. I still hold onto her at night and feel things coming through a lot. Like last night I had some dream about selling something, and then I thought it might have been Lyn's dream instead of mine because of what was involved and all.

Lyn also told me that her and her mom are best friends and really close. No surprise of course. But then I wonder how much she knows about me already, and if Lyn shares everything or not. I really don't mind, but kinda would like to know. Now I feel like I need to get a hair cut and a beard trimmed tomorrow. I want to look good for her mom, as if that would make much of a difference for me.

Wow am I beat, I need to get into bed. I wonder if Lyn will call the moment I lay down or maybe try to plan something for tomorrow or Friday. . . . I offered to help out and even thought how I have an extra room here if they are cramped over there. Never said anything about that of course. . . .

Thank You Dearest Christ Jesus for making this all Happen for You Glory, Amen!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

5:17:20 PM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What now?

I've really gone bonkers for Lyn. I mean every moment we share together, on the phone, even her emails just pump me up with so much energy and excitement. I walk into my house and see pictures of her that I put everywhere and I just start smiling feeling all warm inside.

She was telling me about picking up energy Sunday, and has told me how people will suck her energy, and wondered if that ever happened to me. Never! That's when I told her about going dancing in college. All these crazy people that go out all the time are never conscious about their energy and have no control over it, always wanting and seeking, spilling out their energy everywhere. It's like the blind ego desires just sends out energy everywhere. Course I always just suck it up and get totally pumped up.

She said Sunday she knew I liked to dance. Not sure why, lol . . . but she said I could likely be out there with them all night on the dance floor. I guess every moment I held her close to me I would just get totally pumped up again. Lol . . . yes so of course I could dance all night, you just wait and see . . . lol . . .

Today I visited Dr. Cohen and told her I was thinking that she was giving me the insight to pull together what was left for John's article. She wanted to see what I wrote for John already. I printed out a copy from the Wiki and gave it to her saying how I could create an outline of what I had and what I thought I needed to add to it. She said that would be a good place to start.

Of course I had my presentation books and went through everything with her. I guess the symmetry and synchronicity just totally blow my mind all the time. She didn't seem to concerned about all that, but just wanted to make sure I was clear and focused on what I would write up for her. Course she said this was the first time she did this and I teased her saying how she likely spoke to John about it ahead of time. She told me she really enjoys talking to John since he is so strong on the academics while she is a lot more practical and applications focused. She said how both were really necessary and together the two perspectives give stronger insights into things. Then I told her how being an engineer was something that really made things cool for John and I since we were so far opposites on so much . . .

Course then I look up at Lyn's picture again and think about how much we are opposites on certain things but then also identical on other things. It's really wild almost, as we slowly get to know each other more and more. It really feels like she is falling in Love as much as I am. Sunday when she was leaving . . . and asked Ciera to say good-night, Ciera said she loved me. That flows out of her very easily, but I was still totally thrilled. I said it again to Lyn too, but she's likely heard that from a hundred men anxious to get into her pants.

Ok I confess, I've dreamt a great many times of being inside of her. She has been coming to visit me at night through the ethers, where my dreams are felt and shared by both of us. But on Sunday when she drove into Ybor City and parked we noticed Ciera was asleep in the back seat. So I all but jumped on her. It was really powerful, kissing, breathing, hugging, sharing . . . very strong and full of passion. She was still trying not to let us stay connected too long. Then she even said she's not been intimate in a long time. I joked that I was sure everything still worked and it was not something she could forget.

But then I admitted I hadn't really loved someone in a long time either. I tried to recline her seat back a few times . . . more so I could hold and kiss her more. She wouldn't let me of course. So thinking about this again this morning I wrote her about it:

Feeling this below again...

Even if you reclined the seat back and asked me to, we would have done nothing more than kiss in the middle of Ybor with Ciera there Sunday . . .

FYI,
Eric

PS. Course I can do anything, so if it wasn't our first opportunity and Ciera wasn't there . . . I'd enjoy doing anything you wanted . . .

Eric wrote:

And next time Our daughter falls asleep.

Wow, I am just totally swept up by this lady. Each moment we share is another complete dream. We get closer and laugh more and learn more about each other. It's obvious we both want to get intimate. I mean we do at night through the ethers, but she's still scared or nervous about something. It's really funny. Like I tease her about her heels and she says how the heels make the shape of her legs look better . . . lol . . . YEA, she said that not me.

Course then I joke that I need to wear my heels too so she's not taller than me when we go out. She said she's always taller than men. But then she kicks off her heels and she's just about my size, maybe just a little bit shorter. I can tell she likes that. Whenever we get deep into a kiss I'm holding her head up to me cupped in my hands . . . savoring every morsel. I'm always rubbing her and pumping her energy up. It's really funny because I never even notice some of the things I do. Like when we were in her car deep into each other I was like thumping her chest with the palm of my hand.

She asked about me moving energy like that, and then I noticed what I was doing. Course you think I'd be going after her breasts instead like any normal American warm blooded guy. BUT NO, I never thought of that! It's really neato of course, since the things she's worried about are likely the things that will be the most exciting and our strongest connection. It's funny I time warp back to the experiences with Maryanne. Like is it possible to do that again? Can I really Beat that?

I mean that was 2 years of fantasies to fulfill the truth of God inside of me. While this is more like 20 years. . . to Fulfill GOD's Purpose on Earth . . . I guess that might mean this fantasy will be a whole lot more than I could ever imagine. I guess having a daughter who never had any contact with her dad kinda makes it easy for me. And I never dreamed that could come so easily!

8:51:28 PM

Wow another incredible meeting with the UT business planning class now. I love how excited people get about opportunities I present. As soon as I got home I wanted to call Lyn . . . I just wanted to share my joy and happiness. Then I remembered I called her last night too. I wanted to see if she had Ciera home with her and see if she was ok after the crazy day at work. I'm still curious about this of course, and want to help her out or listen if she needs to sound off about it all.

She was kinda stressed about things at work, so I wanted to support her on that. But I also know how I shouldn't be calling and writing her all the time. Lol, so I wrote her again now instead of calling again. . . . Only four emails today, lol . . . starting at 2am of course.

It's funny, I send a bunch for every one she sends. Then I usually include all kinds of links and other references. Lol, course the last one I just sent included a PS about being short without rambles or links so I'm getting better. I never got a reply on the business note I sent to her office, but she might have avoided it? Course that doesn't sound like her at all.

I guess what I really feel is how she's as crazy and hooked on me as I am with her. I've released everything so I'm free while she's still struggling with work and divorce and all kinds of crap. So we really share the bliss and fantasies over the weekends, but she sticks to the grind during the week. I guess that's really what she has to do for now. Expecting me to provide for her is something she will never do. She's very independent about that. And her challenges at work seem more to prove something than to make any income. I can't change that for her, but I can show her it's not necessary.

I still look at her picture wondering if I'm just dreaming. Sunday as we watched the concert she was drumming on my knee. It's funny how that's what sticks in my mind after all we did, even over chewing on her neck and ears in the car. I joked about bite marks and she said I left a hicky, though I never saw anything. I do kinda feel awkward walking with her when she's a few inches taller, but she doesn't seem to care.

I joke about it, saying how it's just right for me to keep biting her neck. Remember "love at first bite!" I start remembering this bite and the golden strands in my face for 2 months, then feeling this tongue I got for 2 weeks, and now her tapping on my leg and asking about OUR daughter. What a weird thing to catch onto and remember so much. Really weird . . . oh and it's 9:54:17 PM . . . almost 10pm so I need to get in bed and find her again.

I feel her all the time. Different things I hear or think about remind me of her and she's there with me. Thank You Dear Jesus Christ for bringing us together. Please lead and Guided us to Fulfill all Our Dreams for the Glory of God, Our Father, Son and Holy Ghost, Amen

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Monday, January 15, 2007 12:26:25 PM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

Monday, January 15, 2007 12:26:25 PM

We had another simply incredible Sunday. She came to Harmony just as it ended. Funny, Lu, Chet and Beth saw us together, and Ciera jumped into my arms the moment she saw me. I introduced Chet and Lyn, but no one else gave me the opportunity. We stopped at my house for a quick lunch, she loves my salads with super garlic bread. Ciera had cheese and crackers, eating almost only the turkey meat though. Then we went shopping at Big Top . . . funny, I sorta freaked her out knowing things about what she wanted and all. Lol . . . she asked me a few times "How do you know?" On our drive out she was telling me about getting more power all the time, and I tried to explain about picking up the loose energy, dancing and such. Course she wanted explicit details for that. No big deal, energy tends to respond to control, so if no one else controls their energy it only gives us more power to use and control.

Then she wanted to visit International Plaza in Ybor for a dance/drumming MLK festival. It was magical. I found us front row seats the moment we walked in. We sat holding onto each other and Ciera sat in front of us on some pillows with some other children. These kids actually preformed in the event too, while Ciera made friends with them all, hugging and playing at our feet.

At the end of the concert there was a lot of food set out for everyone there too, and Ciera was getting really tired and hungry as we got to the end of the line. I picked her up so she could see everything and I could fill a plate for her. Lyn filled a plate for each of us as we all went around the big buffet. We were almost done ready to find seats and Lyn said to me something about "OUR DAUGHTER" . . . My eyes must have popped right out of my head, as I turned to her comment. She knew exactly what she said too, looking at me almost as surprised as I was. It was just the natural spontaneous truth of the moment, and the love between us must have radiated through the whole place.

We ate, me teaching Ciera how to use her fork again . . . and soon we were all up dancing together. I did get close and danced a bit with just Lyn, but it was a very festive community gathering with lots of kids and families. Everyone talking and sharing together . . . oh except me, every second of my attention was on these two girls, I barely noticed any one else, even when they tried to talk with me ;-)

I can't even imagine how many times I went to art, dancing and social events with my children . . . played and danced with the kids . . . and watched other couples cuddling wondering if I would ever be so lucky. Sure the kids love to see their parents close, it gives them more strength and security. But more importantly when the parents are close and full of Love for each other it really radiates the family and community spirit and values to everyone affecting the Whole Earth . . . especially their children who glow and beam with the love as well.

The love and joy of Family is really what makes a community. Course bureaucrats and lawyers know this and are designed to undercut this stability to ensure greed stays in control.

Wow, this is getting powerful already. It feels like my research again. Sure I know everything that I do is always for God's purpose and plans, so nothing surprises me in the least.

What are you finding in this?

I was feeling my negotiations class again. How it is the "frame" set for the deal that really sets up everything else . . . are we going to create a win-win, are we friends helping each other, or are we only trying to beat our opponent. Is this about greed or about community? Are we people evolving into Love, or are we mad dogs fighting for survival? Each assumption about context changes the purpose and goals in the interaction.

What else comes to you?

I guess I know this is what everything is about. Community truths and morals are what is missing in our culture of greed and control. It's really just a matter of truth. What are the real values of our society, we can all preach about truth and justice for all, but we also know that preaching this won't make it happen if we don't practice it anywhere. When we look at our structures in our society we start at an individual relationship and then comes the family, church, neighborhood, community, city, state and Nation.

Somewhere in between is a company or business. Currently the values and the truth get more and more diluted as the size of the institution gets larger. Fundamentally an individual relationship should be based on truth and Love. However the corruption in the courts brings greed even into this with the divorce laws making it easier and better to avoid love and truth since you can take so much.

Now the fundamental values and truth of a loving relationship is nearly completely lost as well. Today people get into relationships for selfish reasons of greed and desires of control; full of selfish expectations and lusts. Similarly the values of the other structures in our culture are more and more based on selfish greed and control issues. People rarely trust or confide in their own priests or teachers. Then police and civil servants are avoided since they will typically treat citizens as a hassle, a number or something else to control and manipulate for selfish reasons.

In the larger scale of politics and elected offices; values and morals are basically a joke. There is no integrity there, nor is there any expectation that such positions will perform ethically or within their own professed guidelines. Unless there is a significant direct personal gain involved. The entire structure and system is simply not designed to create values and ethical decisions.

What else do you feel about this?

I guess the whole conception of a paradigm shift is about moving from greed and corruption to truth and cooperation. As we get smarter and stronger organizations we should have a more substantial culture and truth instilled into everyone. However, as groups increase in size the opposite happens, people get lazier and the values and culture gets more carnal and useless.

Hum, this sounds like something I need to explore more. I seem to have found a problem worthy to explore in greater detail, but I now need to formulate a theory about it. . . . hum

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

10:54:45 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

Hi Lyn,

Quick thoughts:

If you are not getting treated right then don't put all your eggs in one basket, and let's visit some other people I know: www.mdgflorida.com

Did you get this job from John's contacts?

My last project is done, so I'm not engineering anything now, if you need help. Another ace in your hands. After all the fun with OUR daughter, please just ask me if you need help with OUR other guests. No engineering with only 3 classes means plenty of free time, remember I can do anything!

Also, get some reasonable help dealing with John, see James R Kramer, PA.

Finally, what does the lunch schedule look like?

Love and Light to you … and OURS, lol ;-)

God Bless

Eric

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

The American Way

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you feel?

I start reading this all again and realize how I refer to sections that I've not posted here yet. I Blog and Journal and post a lot of emails too. I try to link them all together here, but if you're not on a dozen lists and able to click from website to website you will really have no clue what I'm talking about a lot of the time.

What's wrong with that? Didn't you just say you made things too easy for people? It's great to see you do have something of a challenge here for people. Let them search and study. That's what people need to do to learn and grow. People take Freebies for granted and never grow from them, they simply get lazy and co-dependent on more freebies. It's kinda sad how easy it is for people to get so lazy. Like America the great welfare state. . . Course the whole greed centered culture teaches people to be lazy, rely on corrupt corporations and politicians for everything so people just become useless consumers adding to other's greed.

I know that's what I really need to be writing about. I have to get back to my studies and read more about things to complete the research paper for John.

What about the negotiations?

Oh, I was feeling how much that was the fundamental element I was looking for. People base their relationships and interactions on some perceived goal or personal gain they can obtain. It's like people interact only if they are able to find a motive and benefit from the interactions. I guess this is really the greed and corruption mentality that people are programmed with, since I normally will interact with anyone who crossed my path. I guess I've become a little more conscious that just because people cross my path and ask for something, does not necessarily mean they are entitled to anything from me . . . .

But still I tend to give all the time anyway, to anyone who gets close enough to ask, whether it is in my best interests or not. I guess that's why I decided to get more clear about what I wanted and needed. It's no use living and creating all the time if I don't bring and attract the things that inspire and help me to grow to create better. But then I still trust people and accept anyone who crosses my path . . . lol . . . even to my detriment. Though I think I've been getting more discerning, and making more effort to connect to what attracts me and avoid what doesn't. . .

What about the negotiations?

I guess I felt I needed to go over all this with Dr. Cohen. Course that means starting from ground zero and explaining as much as possible. Though that always intimidates me. Funny, like even last night on the phone when someone asked questions that led me to stories of my past, I tended to avoid it . . . while in fact I started telling her stories that I already had told her earlier. She even liked it, since it was confirming and giving her better grounding into my past and the power I carry and know is there. I always feel embarrassed with the old war stories, even after I realized she had heard it before. I guess it's gotten to the point that I can not defer to readings as much any more. She's catching up to my NOW, and it's more about simply BEing than remembering and piecing things together.

What about the Negotiations, you are rambling off again.

I guess I felt how my whole research project was about negotiating a Phd out of the school. And everything that I am doing is geared to that. Not simply the Phd, but the methods and procedures that I've created for them. It's all about who I am. Like the very first class I took was "Leadership and Teams" where I was redesigning the Patent Process to make it easier for people to develop and succeed with new ideas. The systems are not designed for totally new ideas, they only want things that add to the existing corruptions to strengthen the monopolies and greed there. While Creations is all about new stuff and getting out of their box.

Where are you going with this?

I guess I've gone full circle again. I started off telling them how to do it all. And now I'm simply doing it. By presenting my patents to classes now and negotiating their commitment where I can develop something completely new and innovative, I'm really doing what they told me I couldn't do when I started. It reminds me of the CUTR dude, sitting in his arrogance "no new transportation system is possible" we can only survive with the car and the highway with these major industrial monopolies that control our culture and way of life . . . anything beyond that is simply not possible . . . lol . . . sure, I got the patent anyway . . .

oh "not possible" lol . . . sounds like my name is all over it . . . like kissing in kindergarten, or earning thousands selling candy and drugs to spoiled little yuppies . . . lol . . . no one can do that, it's not possible . . . or throwing lightning bolts. . . "not possible" . . . lol . . .

Oh weirdness again. I was in the shower and noticed on the side of the tub what looked like black smoke stains on the sides. Course I hadn't any candles in there or anything. Nor have I been covered with grease or dirt that would leave such stains. Oh well, so I got out the soup and cleaned them off. Then another time after an incredible chant and erotic night I got into the tub and sat down to relax. I love the hot water beating down onto my head and always feel it as a clearing. I sounded out some strong Words of intention and gratitude for God. . .

Strong powerful vibrations deep into the earth. I opened my eyes again and there on the tub were these black smoke stains outlining where my thighs were against the tub . . . Oh that explains it . . . The Power of the Word . . . lol . . . my old friends . . . lol . . . here we go again . . . lol. . . "No mater what happens next I'm ready... Dear Father, Shine Your Light on me... I pray for forgiveness, let my heart receive. . . today, is the day, I'm ready" Circle of Fire CD, "I'm ready" by Cari Cole playing now off my PC! (lol... sent a few of these songs to Someone )

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ Please fill me with You Spirit to Fulfill the Glory of Fatehr Son and Holy Ghost, Amen.

1/13/07 7.39pm

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What's up?

I invoke and dream awake the constant ability to be centered and empowered all the times. I am empowered by everything. . . My life is a continuous stream of Miracles. . .

The Spirit Rap just started here again. It's such a powerful CD, all about he WORD! So much power, more power. It's funny how much these things always reinforce everything that I am. Like I've had people asking me about past lives and the power of the Word. So I refer them to things I've written and now I was asked about Karma and Forgiveness. More powerful words that I posted about in th last few days . . . Oh just keep reading . . . like the previous posting answers that questions too. It's kinda funny.

Why should it be funny at all for you. This is all you are about. The WORD. When someone asked you for insight and guidance and the Words you wrote yesterday answers their questions today . . . these Words have so much more power. It's a conscious kinda personal thing. Whenever you can read something that was written spontaneously it carries so much more power. Sure ask a question now and make up an answer to fit, anyone can do that. But ask a question now and the answer was written yesterday . . . now that's Power! It's a human thing, dealing with time. Time really has no meaning of course, it's just another tool you devised to play out your dance. Like Friday, how many times were you pressed with time? And raced crazy wanting the time to stop, but then found you were early and the time was waiting for you.

I know I need to stop racing so much and simply know how the time will wait for me. Like now I can feel things changing all around me as I feel at Love and Peace with what I want and need in my life. Like at class this morning, I was concerned about this and that. There was another student there who watched my presentation yesterday. He said mine was the only project worth pursuing, and thought that everyone would sign up for it. So I told him how the teacher would welcome several teams doing it . . . so he could remind him in the next class.

Then the teacher in this class had heard about my project too, and said I could present it and do it here as well . . . . Ok I don't mind presenting it, but I'm not so sure I want to work on it again. My whole idea was for someone else to start the company and get it going. I've no time for anymore companies . . . lol . . . course I talk about grants and new projects every day. Which really ultimately lead to new companies anyway . . .

That is who you are Son, you will always create and do things what else have you been feeling about these classes?

I thought about how I could present a new patent every year if I wanted to. Course I got a notice from the Patent Office Thursday that the Unity Method was all set ready to go to the next stage. I figured it was done already and keep seeing it show up on my completed patents page for Idea Weaver, Inc.

What else are you feeling now?

I told someone to go chant and relax today . . . and feel her searching for connections again, like the buzzing in my ear. Why do I make it so easy for people . . . lol . . . reminds me of Keith and Dan. I made it so easy for them to start a business and become profitable . . . TOO EASY, so instead they sat and drank or watched TV. Wasted my time and space for useless things instead of creating something worthwhile. It's like making it a challenge is necessary for people to work and grow. And I just make it so easy for people all the time. Hum, I need to get more demanding . . . What about easy and fun for me! Push them on things so that it's not so easy . . . lol . . .

What did you feel now?

I was thinking about my presentations this week, and next week . . . lol . . . Last week it was to USF and next it's to UT, and I really give them everything they need to put something really viable together. None of this pie in the sky dreams about business success and creating some hot profits . . . but a really viable simple product that will splash and stun the market place creating a powerful buzz and high profits very easily. And I just give it out to them . . . I should have a time limit for me, so if I do too much myself, then I get to keep more of it myself . . . but what's so funny is that it's about profits and cash. And I care less about profits and cash.

What do you remember about cash? Where did that start for you?

Oh I always had lots of cash. I was thinking about that Friday too. I started fixing bikes for people before I started school (any school, like pre-5). Guess I was inventing or designing my own things back then too. Nothing too interesting but the cool fort and such that went with that . . . . lol . . . oh the sling shot that could send snowballs over 300 yards . . . lol . . . no one would ever mess with our fort! Hum, and I guess I didn't start selling candy until like5th grade. Guess before that I was too busy with the love notes and kissing girls . . . oh annoying all the teachers.

In High School I really started inventing things. I remember the foot break for my bike and the round tables, that I still have. But I'm sure there were a lot of other things. Course I was selling all kinds of things then, always with a roll of bills in my pocket . . . playing cards to win more lunch money too. Totally in control of all the greed ego crap I guess . . . Oh yea, so it bores me now. Getting rich is no challenge . . . guess I'm trying to make it all out of thin air now? Or get someone else to do all the work to make me rich . . . lol . . . but i guess if I give them everything they need to do it, I'm still making it too easy for them.

What's all that?

A new song came on, very powerful spiritual music and I could feel someone wanting more than a search . . . "Aadays Tisai Aadays" by Prem Snatam Kaur Khalsa

yes but creating the power and helping others to move more power is only for you if you set your intentions into it instead of just letting the energy float out there.

I know so I need to get out tonight! I can't be spending so much time alone. Sure I'm always with you. And I get out to Harmony, I don't sing every Sunday anymore, but at least I'm still getting out. Harmony lets me chant too and teach once in while as I know I need to. But getting out for me needs to happen more now!

What is it that you want?

I still want to fall in love!

Isn't that what you did already?

I'm clear about it and feel the passions and free light beauty of it all. The truth is there and everything but it's not clear totally yet . . . Oh I guess the full physical confirmation isn't finished. Sharing the dreams and light is wonderful and fine, but that's still only dreams and light not nearly as powerful as the Word in NOW BEING it all and expressing it fully.

What about building up the power and energy you want and sending it out there?

I guess I do that every time I Chant, so it's Chant time again . . . lol . . . wee fun! ALWAYS!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ, Fill me with Your SPIRIT for the Glory of Father Son and Holy Ghost! Amen.

08:35:56

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

I'm ready to write Lyn again… lol…. Sent her too much already though

Hi Sweetie,

I'm thrilled about how I make you comfortable and happy so easy, but we might be having a little trouble soon…

Well it's our nightly little thing we do. I know it happens all the time and sometimes I wake up in . . . hum, in you; and sometimes I wake up with you in me . . . which is all really fine and dandy.

But this morning I woke up sore.

Like I'd hate to pull the plug on our fun, but we better get away from just the etheric soon … before we rub off all the skin on something that might enhance things for us physically some day. Lol . . . I mean, I understand if you don't want to, or not for some time in the future, but I kinda need this, and really need to treat it a bit better for posterity's sake if nothing else…

Do you get my drift? Find Ciera a date for a night, or simply plan a day over here with just me!

I can't believe I even wrote that. I certainly won't send it to her, but wow it almost sounds like I'm trying to push her into sex. I can't believe I've ever done that in my life. Usually I'm getting pushed. Hum, but I guess that's the point, I am getting pushed again and well it hurts! So I guess it's more self preservation than getting selfish or horny.

Though I must admit everything about her makes me horny. And she even admitted yesterday at lunch how we are always building up this energy and excitement . . . just to stop before she can't stop. I said it of course, and she knew it, but wouldn't confirm or deny it. Course we were sitting in a place that her, her ex and Ciera visited often.

Lol, but I did send it to Kathy.

She called me when she got it . . . told me to say "please" and to call instead. Oh that's a good idea so I called. Lyn picked it right up. And she understood completely enjoying our hot night together in the ethers. Yes, but my rubbing a hole through my pillow isn't healthy for me. She was amenable and sounded like we might be able to do something about it for real. She had a full day planned with Ciera and offered to call me again when she got home.

Course then she started getting into the numerology and all kinds of stuff, reading things from a book share really liked to get a sense of what I felt about it all. Course everything we find speaks more and more about how good we are for each other. So maybe she's gotten enough confirmations from everything around to get a bit more serious. Or at least explore the chemistry a bit more. Course her numerology book spoke about our intimacy and desires for very sensual intimacy. We've both already known this and experienced it a bit too.

I'm not holding my breath for tonight, but now it certainly feels like a sure thing. We'll see I guess.

Thank You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ, Amen!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Friday, January 12, 2007 8:32:33 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

Friday, January 12, 2007

8:32:33 AM

Wow this is going to be really intense. I can feel a lot of things coming together and changing really quickly.

Thank You dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Please fill Me with your strength Love and Wisdom to achieve for the Glory of God, Our Father, Son and Holy Ghost, amen.

7:54:08 PM

We had lunch again today. I planned it with a place I picked, but it was CLOSED, so she suggested another place further away. It was a place she visited often, where everyone knew her, so she told me I couldn't be all "lovey dovey." Course if I knew that I never would have gone . . . lol . . . well it was cool anyway, a little Cuban place. Happy family, really nice place where I felt right at home, while she's hugging and talking with everyone, having not seen them this year yet.

But she also got really serious with me talking about a few issues. She has been able to talk about these things with one of her closest friends, but evidently knew we had shared a lot already and were very connected. She started asking me about past lives, Aliens and where I fly off too . . . Oh gezs, just read my journal . . . lol. . . like the very last words I'd written were all very clear and specific to exactly what she wanted to know. She asked me to explain it all there and I simply wouldn't, focused more on Ciera and all the other things we've been sharing.

I kinda recounted a lot of our experiences together, linked with what she was doing. It was really cool, because we both knew so much of our past and how we'd done countless lives together. I guess as I think about it more now, everything between us was on the edge. I never charged my cell phone so it was about dead but we talked all the way between the restaurants, watching each other in the mirrors.

Both of us laughing about how much we already know from each other . . . like it's family and she finishes my sentences as much as I do hers . . . total complete understanding between us every moment. So she's getting more connected to everything and asking me about feeling it all the time all around her. Yea, just you wait! Lol . . . Like the first thing she says is how she had two cups of tea already and was wired with the caffeine. Cool, we're both there now!

Then the guy running the place has my answer . . . every day you walk around and people say "hi how r u" and I'm always saying "WONDERFUL" just blissed out running around . . . so he felt like a brother immediately!

Oh like the presentation today in Dr. Henley's class. Totally blissed out! Everything was dry and stale and you could see the class was half awake . . . JAMMED PACKED full, every seat taken, even a few in extra chairs, 50 people he said. Course I should have put a counter on each webpage I showed them since they are likely buzzing now . . . lol . . . I was the very last presenter!

I just ripped through the whole thing. Here's the deal. Here's all it is. Here's what you can do. I invent and aint got time to run another business. Get it together and you get a 1/3. They had some good questions. Basically all the details about all I've done and it's all; is on a disk for you to read at your leisure!

OH THAT's PERFECT. Never said it that clearly, I'm sure . . . lol . . . Another guy to present before me was John who worked on the recycling job with me. He even talked about it as he started his presentation, referring to when we had the class. Then he told me after how no one could read any of my slides . . . course I gave them links on the letter they got, so I was just telling them what's there. Then he said how I had everyone laughing. Dr. Henley liked it too, said "it's just you, Eric;" when he came outside and looked at my truck. I told him I would welcome multiple teams. He said he preferred that too.

I need to be bloggin this don’t i?

What you are doing is blogging, simple post it all when you are finished.

I have a lot to write, don’t I?

Well you've been doing a lot haven't you?

I guess so, but it feels like not much at all.

What happened changed the whole world Son, everything you do affects so many people and changes a lot. The "taken for a ride" documentary movie you saw with your department this morning was really important too. It involved several departments and colleges and though you said nothing about it, your name was referred to in the general discussion. The CUTR dude remembers you, and you have the patent he denied was ever possible. The email you can write to this group is something you will need to consider for a while.

What's important now is that you allow this all to flow easily. No judgments, no concerns, just accept it as your truth and enjoy it. Everything is coming together exactly as you have created.

I guess so. It's funny how I don't like talking about these things in detail out in public. I told her about Chuck and she said I'd told her that before, but as I did she was surprised by the details . . . ? So I told her anyway. It was weird repeating things I write here. Like I said how it's so much like a dream and I never really feel like I was there at all. I feel it all but never remember what I said. It's like I was never there, told her how I always look at the kiss picture.

What do you feel now?

I guess I better go chant . . . 9:37:34 PM

What did you do?

I keep reading over what I've written wonder 9:52:20 PM

thank You so much for Your WORD!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

horoscope

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

Dear Eric,
Here is your single's love horoscope
for Friday, January 12:

Relationships are in the stars -- perhaps former ones and possible new ones too. Meanwhile, look at the relationships around you. What do you want yours be like? What do you want to do all you can to avoid?

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Thursday, January 12, 2007 1:06:39 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!
Thursday, January 12, 2007 1:06:39 AM

Wow, such clear pure POWER! Tremendous power. It's just so awesome that I can't handle it sometimes. Well I can ALWAYS handle more power, I seem to be able to control it so easily. Like I remember the first time in NJ at the college party where I just started telling people what to do. It was kinda freaky, too much power, but I did it anyway and even played with it a bit. Not really doing anything dangerous or harmful to anyone, but certainly more than I want to describe in detail now. . . .

Why not tell some more?

I guess it happened in NC too. After I said goodbye to my mom and she came home from the Hospital anyway with the first CWG book. I never read anything in a weekend in my life before. Then I found the next conference was in Black Mountain where my kids were that very moment. Course I got a scholarship for the week retreat from a USF alumni too . . . lol. . .

What's the point? You're rambling again. . .

Oh sorry. So when I was up there and got all this power moving THAT was TOO intense for me. The spontaneous regressions were neat . . . talking to the pirates as we went into the harbor to sack another city . . . oh and hunting for Bambi's dad with Roosevelt was a trip too. . . Oh rambling again . . . but really when Tim talked about the evil in the basement trying to stop us and I saw all the darkness come in around him; it was almost funny how quick that changed with just a Word. . .

You're still rambling. . .

Oh I need to get the context. . . I mean even glowing in the dark and people calling me an alien was almost funny. Yes I know, it was the blue sparks that totally freaked me out. I mean paying with power is easy, or fun most of the time. But when I heard the thunder and people talked about how there was no rain and no storms. . . I still thought nothing of it. But seeing blue sparks roll off my shoulder into thunder totally freaked me out. That's when I stopped and left to go home, at 3am! No wonder John said I was a Pleiadian or something . . .

Oh figures, I looked up the word to see how to spell it and that website has a picture that looks familiar to me . . . lol . . .

That was the Words coming out of you with the thunder. You know the power of the Word is what this is all about and what you have been doing and working with all of your life. You experienced how the lies and deceit of greed were so common and effective as a child and simply decided that was something that you wanted to change. You were able to fill your children with Our Truth and Power, but they needed to learn about lies and deceptions on their own. You can not teach them everything. While now everything you are doing is all about the Power of the Word. Writing research papers and helping to publish and even this Journal and blog are all about the Power of The Word. Your strength and ability is all based on the Faith and Conviction you carry in every Word. Everyone listens to you and understands so much from you. Each word has so much power and clarity, even as you carry forth These Words We share with you. Even your love and relationships now are based on the Power of The Word. The Truth they carry and move is something people can easily feel and know.

Yes I know… but I need to sleep 4:23:42 AM

Thank You dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ, Guide us all into Your Spirit, Amen.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

NOW

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

Today's Outlook for
Friday January 12, 2007
Yesterday | TODAY | Tomorrow

The Moon enters mysterious Scorpio at 2:07 am EST, drawing us into our feelings, whether we understand them or not. It's not for us to rationalize our desires at this time, but only to explore them. And sweet romance could be in the air, with sensual Venus now giving optimistic Jupiter a supportive planetary kiss in the form of a sextile. This harmonious aspect places a more positive spin on whatever dark emotions rise to the surface.

		Justice Traditionally, what has been known as the Justice card has to do with moral sensitivity and that ... more » Deck: Morgan-Greer Daily Tarot Reading using this deck
		Your Daily Number: 7 Today has strong spiritual overtones for you. It's a great day for communing with nature and ... more »

It's chant time... lol... wow

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

1:06:39 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What?

Wow, such clear pure POWER! Tremendous power. It's just so awesome that I can't handle it sometimes. Well I can ALWAYS handle more power, I seem to be able to control it so easily. Like I remember the first time in NJ at the college party where I just started telling people what to do. It was kinda freaky, too much power, but I did it anyway and even played with it a bit. Not really doing anything dangerous or harmful to anyone, but certainly more than I want to describe in detail now. . . .

Why not tell some more?

I guess it happened in NC too. After I said goodbye to my mom and she came home from the Hospital anyway with the first CWG book. I never read anything in a weekend in my life before. Then I found the next conference was in Black Mountain where my kids were that very moment. Course I got a scholarship for the week retreat from a USF alumni too . . . lol. . .

What's the point? You're rambling again. . .

Oh sorry. So when I was up there and got all this power moving THAT was TOO intense for me. The spontaneous regressions were neat . . . talking to the pirates as we went into the harbor to sack another city . . . oh and hunting for Bambi's dad with Roosevelt was a trip too. . . Oh rambling again . . . but really when Tim talked about the evil in the basement trying to stop us and I saw all the darkness come in around him; it was almost funny how quick that changed with just a Word. . .

You're still rambling. . .

Oh I need to get the context. . . I mean even glowing in the dark and people calling me an alien was almost funny. Yes I know, it was the blue sparks that totally freaked me out. I mean playing with power is easy, or fun most of the time. But when I heard the thunder and people talked about how there was no rain and no storms . . . I still thought nothing of it. But seeing blue sparks roll off my shoulder into thunder totally freaked me out. No wonder John said I was a Pleiadian or something . . .

Oh figures, I looked up the word to see how to spell it and that website has a picture that looks familiar to me . . . lol . . .

That was the Words coming out of you with the thunder. You know the power of the Word is what this is all about and what you have been doing and working with all of your life. You experienced how the lies and deceit of greed were so common and effective as a child and simply decided that was something that you wanted to change. You were able to fill your children with Our Truth and Power, but they needed to learn about lies and deceptions on their own. You can not teach them everything. While now everything you are doing is all about the Power of the Word. Writing research papers and helping to publish and even this Journal and blog are all about the Power of The Word. Your strength and ability is all based on the Faith and Conviction you carry in every Word. Everyone listens to you and understands so much from you. Each word has so much power and clarity, even as you carry forth These Words We share with you. Even your love and relationships now are based on the Power of The Word. The Truth they carry and move is something people can easily feel and know.

Yes I know… but I need to sleep 4:23:42 AM

Thank You dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ, Guide us all into Your Spirit, Amen.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Tuesday. . . 1st week, 2nd day

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What?

I think I only get to sleep 6 hours now, or less. I tried to crash early last night, but was up again by 1am to chant. I wrote emails and GOT emails after that, so I was all pumped up again when I tried to get into bed. I tried to sleep, but was feeling up close to someone so flew through all the feeling of that . . . it's like a mix between what I know and felt with dreams and visions. It even got into some total fantasy, like I flashed to things I've written, like Shauna's picture . . . the WHOLE picture, not just the piece I posted... lol... then being places and doing things. I remember this one like animation where I knew it was a dream and I was half asleep, but I could still control it and make things happen. Oh, Guess I do that all the time anyway . . . lol. . .

What happened now?

Kathy called. Wow. Heavy stuff. 9.20am already, writing to get some help there. Dave called too about how well the Commercial went over and all the new work they want him to do. . . he needs help too. . . lol. . .

What about class?

Oh yesterday, in Negotiations she had a full room, almost 40 people. Course Dr. Cohen is the only one who read over the Patent Proposal letter I wrote last term. When I got the idea and asked around about it, no one else was around to check my letter. . . Oh so anyway, she has a night class too and I was thinking of going to both so I could get a lot of practice and learn more. Then she told everyone how she added a research paper if anyone wanted to write up something instead of taking the final.

Course she said it was there for Phd Students. . . . and all but asked me to do it, I said I would go over it more and get back with her. . . As I left and started thinking about it more, I realized this was likely exactly what I needed to complete the work I was doing with John. Starting with Spiritual Paradigm concepts I was exploring last year and all the conflicts I exposed in my first paper, I was starting to find last term that the paradigm stuff was a lot more fundamental. Not simply greed and corruption, but a more basic issue.

I told John I wanted to get Adam Smith and Karl Marx stuff to see where it all came from and he told me that was much too fundamental and I'd be better reading certain evaluations of them. But now reading those and feeling out this new class, it seems like we are really talking about the basic frame for a deal...

What do you mean about that, what are you feeling with it now?

It's like if I make a deal with my daughter I have a frame of reference of love and trust and working to help her more than anything. While working with someone else I really have another frame of reference. And I guess when you really look at our entire culture here everything is based on relationships with others where we define each moment, event and transaction based on some frame of reference.

So the greed and corruption I wrote about already is just the current business frame of reference and all the environmental sustainable stuff they are trying to get started is another frame of reference too. Not much different in this case because they are both based on control to create profits which ultimately leads to more greed and corruption . . . hum, so the control and profit is the more fundamental aspect. But still more fundamental to that is the frame of reference that motives everything in between.

What does this have to do with class? you're rambling around in circles again.

I guess the class was about defining the "frame of a deal" and all interactions and relationships are about making a deal. Everyone wants to define the frame and context before they even discuss a relationship, profitable deal or otherwise. Yesterday we did that in class too. She went over some basic concepts and then passed out an example. A seller and a buyer, two pages, each with the background for just one side of a deal.

Then she went through the numbers she had written at the top. Buyer one meet seller one; all the way till everyone was paired off. And then we had 30 minutes to write a deal. Course when I read it they had a base price and an existing price, and simply the buyer was increasing the quantity so needed to negotiate a new price for the increased volume.

Sure I immediately thought the base price meets our costs so that's easy, and give the buyer that and he's got the best deal possible. But I needed to negotiate as high as I could. . . right? It's all about profits and greed, why else would I be taking the class. So I looked at their existing price of 4.20/lb and may base of 3.15/lb... yea so split the difference makes it 3.68. . . that's a good number to target or shoot for. But then I need a first offer higher. So I'll start at 4.00, that gives them a little off and plenty of room over my target to negotiate...

I ended up at 3.73, while the buyer couldn't go over 3.75. . . I really did good, one of the highest in the class. I was surprised there was a 3.30 even. Course I knew the guy who got that deal, he was in one of my other classes. . . lol. . . I know to just stick to the "split the difference" with him, lol. . . Dr. Cohen said everyday we would do this with different techniques and different conditions. She said coming back with no deal is better than losing. But in her database for the class she had an average, standard deviation, a high of 3.75 and a low of 3.1 which was a big no-no. Saying again that it's ok to return in 30 minutes with no deal but the 3.1 with a loss was no good.

It was kinda cool. the 3.73 I got was about 2.5 SD over the mean. So I was almost embarrassed to be pushing such a hard deal. . .

What did you learn?

I guess what I realized was how it went in the deal. Like I goofed around talking and being polite before we started. Said how I never do this since moving rivers can go from 1000 to 100,000 in a flash. Like replacing a weir or building a new pond can change the costs in a second. lol. . . Guess as we sat upside under a tree to talk our deal I actually said how a Grandfather Oak could change the deal in a flash. Make an estimate for a site, but then you can't remove one tree and the whole site plan has to change doubling or tripling the costs.

What were you feeling?

I felt someone close I know who deals with this all the time. Like I could just say $x/hr and that was it. People I worked with knew me and trusted I could do anything. I guess all my clients know I can do anything or I wouldn't offer to do it at all. No commitment or guarantees but most everyone who hires me knew it was my terms or no job. Which usually meant no project for them at all. . . lol. . . guess I had a slight advantage there.

What now?

I know I need to update my fee schedules again. . .lol. . .

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

6:09:08 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

Lyn and Ciera came over to my house yesterday to go biking. I thought they would make it to Harmony, but called me last night while I was sleeping. I had a long day Saturday helping Dave film an Albertson's Commercial so I was dead to the world at 8pm when she called. No message or anything so I thought she might have changed her mind about Sunday.

In church Fred Johnson was there. DJ never told me about anything so I wasn't ready to tape him. When it ended I went to speak with him and he recognized me from Treehouse with Magi and my kids. I told him I had written Rosie, his partner on something the day before. He was as stunned as I. Then I gave him a card and said we needed to talk about getting a grant for them. "FOR SURE!" He really loved the place and said how there was so much clear strong energy there.

Lyn called me just after things ended. She tried to invite me out Saturday night with them when she called and almost made it into Harmony too. Then she said Ciera was napping and they would be at my house in a few hours. Wow, I was really surprised. As I got the video packed up and got ready to go talking to DJ about things, I showed her the picture I have of Lyn and I. She looked and said wow, that's Lyn, she's wonderful. Yes I know, and she just called planning to bring her daughter Ciera to my house today . . . you could see she was as surprised and happy as I was.

So then I raced out to Wild Oats. I wanted to get some lettuce for sandwiches and some juice. I also thought about some ground turkey to make spaghetti, but forgot about it. I had the child seat on my Specialized bike and the little bike with training wheels all cleaned up and fixed before they got here. Ciera was thrilled to see the little bike for her and we adjusted the seat for her right away.

I asked if they wanted to go out in the street with three bikes or back in the woods with just two. Lyn said we could start out back and see how it went before coming to the street. We took the bikes through the gate and went out back. I got Bear out on his rope and Ciera strapped in and we were off.

Ciera was hanging onto her mom, who really likes my bike and was moving out across the grass. Ciera wanted to be sure me and Bear kept up and was calling for us as we fell behind; but it was really just magical. We went out across the grass to the entrance then down the road to the river and all the way back up to the little creek. Then I asked if they wanted to stop down by the river and we went back to where the bigger creek hits the river by the bridges. Ciera wanted to get into the water so I toke off my shoes to go with her.

We just walked around looking in the water and finding things to go back and give Lyn who sat and watched us play. Bear was bouncing all around until he was all worn out and then sat next to Lyn. It was really just magical and beautiful exploring together with Ciera. Soon we got on our bikes and headed back to my house. Then I picked up Ciera and put her into the Hammock, and we were all in there soon with a bunch of drums goofing around together again.

Ciera had never seen her mom with anyone but her dad, which evidently was not very much anyway. She seemed to even like how close we were even wanting to squeeze up close with us. I mean really close up to both of us equally. She has big clear brown eyes and long brown hair. Lyn was clear that she needed to look me in the eyes to say hello when they came in and made sure she was comfortable all the time.

Oh and I sent the new pictures to Chuck and Joni and got a reply already:

Good for you Eric. You deserve happiness. She looks like a beautiful person.

Take care,

Joni

----- Original Message -----

From: Eric

To: Chuck

Sent: Sunday, January 07, 2007 10:25 PM

Subject: Re: pictures

Hi Joni,

Happiness is an understatement.... I'm totally blown away... Today we biked down to the river and played in the water and came back home to play drums in a hammock and cook dinner together. . . WOW, her daughter Ceira is a doll

Feels like some fantasy I've dreamed about for all my life...

Take care

er;-)

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

1:54:44 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

Copied to Lyn Tuesday, January 09, 2007; 1:54:44 AM before my Chant time…

From: "Lyn

To: "Eric

Subject: Happy Tuesday!

Date: Tue, 9 Jan 2007 21:47:40 -0500

WOW Eric! I will use a word that you enjoy - WOW! I truly appreciate you sharing your inner thoughts, ideas and dreams. Very Beautiful!!!

Good Night,

Lyn

---

----- Original Message -----

From: Eric

To: Lyn Kline

Sent: Tuesday, January 09, 2007 1:34 AM

Subject: Re: hi again, it's me....

Lyn Kline and Ciera make every day Beautiful...

Chant time, and here's a journal clip for you:

Monday, January 08, 2007

6:09:08 AM

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Sunday 1/7/2007 11.13pm

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you feel now?

Wow, when it rains it really pours. I'm dumbfounded. Just totally perplexed, by about everything. This year is just going to be totally out of hand . . . lol . . . Ok so It's really going to be IN my hands. I mean another person asked me about grants, and the last one I wrote about has one already that she can get.

And I've not even started yet. Oh and my research is getting so tight it's freaky too. I'm getting more and more insights into exactly what I need to write and how to get it all together. My first paper will just be background, making the whole setup is getting really easy.

What about today?

I "sunned" out. . . reading the card above and realized it was right on the money. I was totally in my space, my own private Eden, doing my thing with wonderful magical people who I loved. We biked around with Bear out along the river and stopped to get wet and goof around by where the creek dumps into the river. Then came home and played drums in the Hammock before cooking some yummy fish together.

Better still . . . wow, could it really be any better . . . lol . . . well yes still better we danced a wee bit and sat to meditate together. We kinda freaked each other out by getting into a Tantra position . . . it was nearly spontaneous and we just moved into it, not really trying anything but then we noticed the power and clarity was so strong between us I realized what our position together was. Like total bliss without even trying. I joked how it would be naked, and realize now that's not even the half of it . . . lol . . .

Oh and we danced too . . . I mean, just barely a tiny little bit. And she's a belly dancer so the moves and rhythm were perfect. Ok, that's really not even close. Like the Tantra where it was so right and perfect that we both felt it through to our bones. So the dance together was but a few steps and that was it, but you just know it's so much more . . . this is going to get intense!

This is what you wanted isn't it? You did ask for all of this, didn't you?

I know, I know . . . And it's really funny how You do this to me. You take all these things I've asked about since time began and you knit them all together into this fantastic erotic dream that's just so strong and clear that . . . that . . . wow . . .

That What? Wow what?

I know it's that You make it so clear how I can do anything. And nothing can stop me. This is really about finishing everything, and making the Life we need RIGHT here Right NOW, Save this Earth NOW! I know it's always about Fulfilling Your Love Dear Jesus Christ...

Please Loving Lord Jesus Christ, fill me with your Truth and Wisdom for the Fulfillment of Heaven on Earth for the Glory of Father Son and Holy Ghost, Amen.
I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

5:44:08 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

Wow. Hum, maybe I should make that my middle name. I've been saying it enough and feel it applied to me and my situation all the time now! Eric WOW Weaver… lol…

8:37:28 PM So Lyn wants to bring her daughter over with me this weekend. It's kinda funny, I got this message about it this afternoon that she first wrote yesterday. So I'm totally buzzing with this power I feel from them. Totally full of anticipation and excitement.

Oh also kinda funny, Chuck called. So I sent him a picture of us. He thought we were made for each other. I was really flattered by his comment and happy of course. Funny thing I had lunch with Mark who sounds ready to take his place in STARS. Cool lunch of course. Then I met with Dr. Balfour and told him everything I was doing and then with John.

10:13:03 PM

Wow, chant time. I love you Lord Jesus Christ! BE ME NOW

Oh another Big wow… Joni saw the pictures I sent to Chuck and wrote me a little note too:

Eric,

You look the happiest I've seen you in a long time. Take care.

Joni

It just filled me up with so much joy !!! Yes she is SO RIGHT!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

More new!

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What did you do that for?

Yes, I know I locked up my blog for the New Year. Well I write out my dreams and such all the time. And I also Journal a lot too, separate from this blog, thou I will cut and paste from one to the other some times . . . So as I journalled I felt this De-ja-vu that someone would read something on the blog and freak. Forget that. So I locked it up. Course a few people asked about it being locked and I simple told them DISCERNMENT!!! Course I like them reading so I have opened it up again.

What else about blogging is there to share?

Oh, someone else called me since she knew we could help each other. We are both doing similar things already. . . so I went and popped her blog open to see what she wrote last... WOW, she's writing about me... or writing FOR ME... giving me research related to what I DO. . . how weird is that.

Here my spontaneous insight when I read through some of her websites was that she should get a grant to work with Autistic kids. Told her about STARS and getting things done with us. Course autism is a scam to control the Indigos and Crystal kids, but her vibrational healings and sound work is perfect for kids...

"let the earth rejoice singing with one voice... all creation cried, Holy is the Lord" SpiritFM 90.5 this time... And to hear these words singing to me as I write these words sends this vibration through my whole body and my eyes start to tear up . . . "All Creation Proclaims your Majesty, and now we see..."

Who else did you send Grant stuff to.

Oh it was Ed and Dave. I got them to meet and told them to find a grant to fund their next Spiritual Movie. I think it actually registered with Ed this time. Last time we met there was SO MUCH energy moving around getting grounded and real about DOing something was nearly impossible. But everything comes together when it's ready . . . only when it's ready.

What do you need to do now then?

I have lunch with a researcher from Moffit who I met last term. He's exploring for new grants and creations too. I think he's ready to make something happen too. He liked the STARS stuff. Course I need to meet Dr Balfour too, just to tell him what I'm doing. I always blow things out of the water, and kinda like to make sure people know my intentions before they find the castles crumbling unexpectedly. It's like a CYA kinda thing I think. Most the time people have NO CLUE what I'm talking about or what I'm doing. So when the bomb hits it's good that I warned them up front. . . lol. . .

What do you REALLY NEED to do?

I PRAISE & THANK YOU Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ for all Your Strength, Wisdom and Truth that You Give me. Please let Only Your Word, Deed and Spirit Flow through us as we grow to Fulfill the Glory Of God Our Father, Son and Holy Ghost, Amen.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

5:13:07 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What??

Wow, went to bed early. But then had to get up and Chant, way too much energy moving for me to stay in bed. My hands started to vibrate too much I was struggling to stay still so I simply got up to do all the rituals by 8pm. Everything was very clear and strong like it had been planned for eons. Even the cave scene was a little extra done up for me.

When I got to bed and connected more with Lyn, I told her I wanted to take her home for lunch tomorrow. Of course that could imply all sorts of things which is really wonderful to explore and pursue, but what I realized was that she needs to see ME. I mean, everything that I have shared with her is real, very real, almost too real for the average person to even understand. As I chanted I noticed another picture of us that I had just placed on my alter. The colors and position and even the shadow cast on it from the lamp in the center were perfect and simply awesome.

I realized how she would see to my bones looking through my space here. Everything about who I am and what I do is very strong and obvious. It's all real, nothing to hide, no surprises. I'm sure every man alive has tried to con her and seduce her, as she's deals with satan himself I'm sure. But I only want us to understand each other. God doesn’t bring us together for nothing and certainly we both have a lot to offer and share that's simply beyond even our own conceptions. So I know she will find and see confirmations for who we are and what we can share everywhere she looks in this house.

Then what?

I think she should move into my house this weekend, so we can plan a big engagement party for next month. We can't get married in a month, but we certainly can get engaged and get busy with things so we can be married within the year . . . Lol . . . maybe even have the first child on the way too ;-)

It's funny I think about our time together and all. It was not "love at first site," our eyes can fool us so easily. But it was "Love at First Bite!" When we had our Zen and Tantra hugs and I nibbled her ear and neck; it was a power and vibration through us into the center of the Earth and throughout all the Universe. That bite made the whole experience so very real and clear for me. And the visions and feelings of her golden strands on me as I nibbled were what I felt and saw for the two months I wondered about her.

Wow, two months till the first flowers I sent her for Thanksgiving and then 2 weeks later more flowers for Christmas and we had lunch again. That means we had dreamed and waited 11 weeks before meeting again for lunch. And we both knew there was a lot more for us to do together. It's funny to look at all these numbers. Today will be 14 weeks and 4 days since we met, and will be our 4th meeting and 4th meal together.

Guess we could say 5th meeting since we met at church and then met again the same day for dinner. I went back to looked at the picture of her kiss again. It's really the best picture for me, since I really see she's making the effort to connect to me . . . literally! I guess those months of us connecting in dreams; or maybe years; can be hard to release. I mean we're together for real now, and we are making it more and more real all the time. I'm still slow to say I'm "dating someone" or anything else for that mater.

I'm ready for her to move in though. I'm ready to get really serious about everything that we have and share. It's simply too real and powerful for me. The other day I went and looked up the school in Arizona she wants to go to, in the same city, 6 miles south was a Sustainability Program at another big state university. It looked more like engineering and architecture kinda stuff, water resources more than anything of course. I mean she wants to start there in the Fall, and I'm done with the MBA this term and could be starting anything new I wanted in the Fall as well. I already started the MSM here, but I can transfer that or change it easily.

Then of course I realize I can do anything I want. Like even work as an engineer again. No one alive has done more river models than me and most are multi-million dollar jobs. When I look at my resume and the past work, I see billions of water resource work. So I can easily ask for $100k or more where ever I go. I mean, does it rain here, does the water fall down and collect in puddles and then flow down the streets here any different than it does over there?

Everywhere it rains, and all the water moves exactly the same here as it does anywhere else. Course the EPA models I use are the standard in Europe now. So I could get the same job anywhere and talk circles around anyone who asked me about it all too. That's really what is so funny about all of this to me. I KNOW I can do anything at any time.

Oh like yesterday I called Ed Keller in Oregon and he answered the phone thrilled to death about everything I said about David. David wants to make a Spiritual Movie so there is plenty for them to talk about. While Ed is really all over the place still I'm sure. Course I wrote him an email now too, suggesting stuff for both of them. It feels good to help people out and see that they can grow and succeed together really easily. I guess that's really what I always do. Connect and reconnect and connect some more.

Thank You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ for Sharing this Life with me and Allowing me to Create more Experiences for You. Please help and Guide me throughout all my activities today. Let your light and will shine throughout everything. Amen.

9:36:53 AM I'm still totally buzzing. I've chopped up some more fruit, and the salad is still yummy, so what else, I saged my house again and walked around looking at everything. It feels like I might actually get her to come over today. Of course I'm just watching the clock and waiting for the time to click away. Too much, too busy…

"So I give myself to you loving, on this our wedding day" sounds like James Tyman playing now off of the PC. I made a folder of all the spiritual music that I like and play the whole thing. A dozen or so CD's so I'm sure it could go for hours. I guess I should get busy reading something or getting into something else so I can relax a bit. ;-)

10:53:48 AM I read a bit and am all dressed and ready to go now. I flipped through the pictures I copied for her and wow. It's really still hard for me to believe it all myself. So now I'm in black slacks and loafers with a RED shirt on and a black tie. Shit do I look good! ;-) I tried to call Kathy to see if the red was too much or not.

I planned to wear a white shirt so I can fit into the professional world she is used to. Course I never even tried it on. I just flashed into the red and knew that was better for me today. I plan to leave early and race over as fast as I can so I can time it right. If she likes the idea of going home for lunch, I want to be able to tell her exactly how long it will take to drive out here. Course I know already that I can race to Dr. Prange's office in 15 minutes. So why worry…

Always something more to deal with, more to think about and plan and anticipate. I'm totally thrilled to go out again with Lyn. I wonder about a lot of things, she seems to have a lot of things still to tell me about. Not that anything could change how I feel about her now. It's really all kinda funny to me. I see and understand how much we are made for each other then I also understand her reservations and fears. While I'm really very much at ease with everything about us. It's almost total fantasy for me. Like we've always been together and simply have the opportunity to really have some fun with it again a new time and new way.

Fun with it sounds exactly right for me too. Like how else could we be living and put together except for the fun and joy of it all. It's really just awesome. And I wonder about it a lot, wondering where we will meet next or what will be the next experience we share together. Or really how soon we will be able to share a lot more.

Thinking too much again!

Please Loving Lord Jesus Christ help me to say, do and BE only through Your Spirit for the Glory of God Our Father, Son and Holy Ghost, Amen.

6:30:52 PM She came to my house for lunch! I was really thrilled. And she really enjoyed it too. I told her I wanted her to know that I was for-real and not just here to take her for a ride. On the way back she asked me what I really wanted, so I told her "MORE CHILDREN." She was surprised. So I told her to wait until she sees me with children, she will understand then.

Course I teased her about moving in and getting engaged. I had a bunch of pictures for her too. And even this one in a pretty frame that looked like a wedding picture. I told her she didn't have to take that one if she didn't want a wedding picture on her desk or something. She left it behind, and was grateful I understood why. Then I said how I wasn't even sure she would say she's dating someone or "has a boyfriend." She told me she was very slow on that, and usually never lets anyone near her. NO KIDDING. Lol . . . . But then she said we could get together on Sunday, maybe just go for a walk on some nature trails or something.

When she got here she loved all my pictures on the walls and checked each one. She got a strong sense from my alter and ritual space. She felt very comfortable and enjoyed the place. Funny she even asked before entering my bedroom. Don't ask me why, since she sneaks in every night now through the ethers. She was very polite and sweet about it all. She loved my mom's painting and recognized my dad from somewhere.

Then after we ate she got onto my PC to read my blog and I told her how I locked it up and would open it for her. And then I opened the Horoscope stuff and she saw my birthday. She was surprised that I was older than her. Course I get nervous about sharing that and also . . .

Yes something else to be nervous about. When we got to her office I told her I loved her. She knew already I'm sure, but saying that out to her sorta set her off funny. I could see she was taken back by it. So when I got home and wrote her I told her about love. Not like she needs anyone to tell her. But I wanted to make it clear for her. I get nervous about setting her off balance.

She understands a lot and knows we can do nearly anything. But then she also knows that there are a lot of things that are very fixed and structured for us to deal with. I guess I shouldn't be worried or nervous about anything. She's wonderful and we are super together.

Thank You Loving Lord Jesus Christ! Amen.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

12:11:09 PM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What?

I'm totally all over the place… WoW. I got a note that Lyn opened an e-card I sent to her office for New Years, and 5 minutes later got a thank you note. So I wrote back asking about meeting again and she scheduled lunch for us tomorrow. Course everything else is just cooking as well. I mean it's really kinda weird almost. Even my paper for John is flying into all kinds of new things.

5:50:17 PM Now I went to pickup my pictures and they only had the one 8x10 of me and Lyn. Wow, does it look good. So I went out to CVS again to get some more made. Got some wallet sized ones and a few others. Then I made a 5x7 of the really good one of Lyn and I to put into a really pretty frame I found. Wow, the frame was made for this picture. So I plan to give this to her tomorrow for lunch.

I really want to invite her home with me too. She says she has an hour and a half for lunch so we could really do it if she wanted to. I'm really just totally thrilled to death with her. Everything about her just turns me on. Last night we had a hot and heavy night again too. So I guess I really expected her to call or something.

Now I realize I need to wake up and do affirmations to the full moon tonight and really need to get into bed soon too.

Thank You Dear Jesus I LOVE YOU!

New Year

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you feel today?

It's a new year now. . . . Course I got all these Horoscopes and such in my email this morning. So I clicked on one to do a Free Celtic Cross tarot reading for the new year. Oh yes I always avoid these things. Like when visiting Laura for Christmas, she wanted me to pick another animal card. Last time I got the Dragonfly and this time it was the Cobra. Figures. She asked what my intention was in picking, ugh, forgot about that, guess I was just exploring myself again, like last time. . . lol. . . I get into shuffling the cards and take so much with that I forget everything else. . .lol.

So the Celtic Cross I did this morning was kinda neat too . . . Course it's a computer, so I needed to type in an intention before I started. Future, intention, for me? Hum, more Love, or to Love more... lol... or simply "love" it really just confirmed everything I already knew and have been working on... I guess I could post the whole thing here if I wanted ... hum, maybe I'll just list them all instead:

1. Self: Ace of Pentacles
2. Situation: Seven of Cups
3. Challenges/ Opportunities: Six of Cups
4. Foundation: Queen of Cups
5. Recent Past: Seven of Pentacles
6. Higher Power: Two of Wands
7. Near Future: Eight of Swords
8. Blocks & Inhibitions: Ace of Wands
9. Allies: Six of Wands
10. Advice: The Star
11. Long-term Potential: The Fool

Course I could add links to them all too, but maybe you will find your own meanings for them all.

Taurus & Sagittarius
Key Word: Dynamic
Elemental Force: Earth with Fire

This team will definitely be an active and dynamic one. When the Taurus decides to take on a project, they are on the move and hard at it before you can say, “go.” Combining this with the Sagittarius’ enthusiasm makes a great team. The Taurus brings commitment and timeliness to the fiery Sagittarius and in return receives understanding and optimism. Each is enhanced by the other. Work that requires a hands-on approach or that requires creative thinking is suited to this partnership.

The Sagittarius’ tendency to procrastinate and change their mind on a moment’s notice can be challenging for the Taurus to deal with. Alternately, the stubborn side of the Taurus can frustrate the Sagittarius. Patience and courtesy will alleviate most of the problems that can arise

I think this stuff is kinda neat. It's funny how people often disregard it, saying it's all New Age gibberish. Course there is nothing new about the planets and stars affecting our earth. They have all be reflecting light and sending energy to us since time began. . . and they still do. I guess it all made a lot more sense to me when I started Chanting. After the Lords Prayer the first position is all about dusting the Earth. . .

What does that really mean?

I always thought it was about collecting all the energies that You send to the Earth. That really means all the gamma radiation, light and so forth that comes from the sun and all the other stars and planets that covers our Earth at any moment.

What do you feel about this now?

I need to start on the Mayan list again and describe this all in great detail... wee fun?

What else do you feel?


Your Moon Nakshatra is Pushya

Pushya means "to provide nourishment."

The symbol of Pushya is a cow udder. Pushya is ruled by Saturn, giving you a practical, serious, and determined nature. You will have a dutiful, conservative, and realistic approach, one that appreciates the value of our daily efforts as they magnify over time.

Mythologically, Brihaspati the priest presides here. Brihaspati was the husband of the beautiful Tara. The moon God Soma fell in love with Tara and she with him. The two ran away together and had a passionate affair. After some time she was convinced to return home, but she had become pregnant. She gave birth to a child (Mercury) from the union with Soma. In spite of the child not being his own, Brihaspati agreed to raise him and loved the child as his own, even though Mercury did not reciprocate the affection. A deep compassion and desire to nourish others is seen here, as well as the capacity to endure humiliation for the sake of duty and responsibility.

Strengths: You are very good at putting into practice what you have learned - walking the walk, not just talking the talk. You will have a deep sensitivity to others and the capacity to endure humiliation and difficulty without excessive ego in order to achieve your goals. You are also a good planner, particularly adept at putting into place the right steps that allow your dreams to manifest through patience, humility, and service.

Shadow issues: You may be stuck in your ways and slow to change, convinced that the old ways are the best, tending to be stuffy and conservative. Be careful not to become the martyr, suffering silently, enduring too much for the sake of your long-term goals, or else arrogance, jealousy, and bitterness may result. Your self-contained efficiency may simply be a wall of protection against the fear of change or the difficulty of facing your emotions honestly.

I want to post these other reading I got for the fun of it . . . lol . . .

eric Sun Sign: Taurus Rising Sign: Aries Life Path Number: 5 Chinese Sign: Dragon

	Element: Earth Mode: Fixed Ruler: Venus Color: Green, Red-Orange Famous Taureans: Fred Astaire, Joe Cocker, Bing Crosby, Salvador Dali, Ella Fitzgerald, Sigmund Freud, Audrey Hepburn, Malcolm X, Karl Marx, Golda Meir, Florence Nightingale, Jack Nicholson, Michelle Pfeiffer, William Shakespeare, Barbra Streisand, Eva Peron, Orson Welles Strengths: Cautious, committed, enduring, faithful, patient, persistent, realistic, reliable, responsible, sensual, stable, tender. Weaknesses: Conservative, greedy, indecisive, inflexible, jealous, lazy, materialistic, naive, overindulgent, possessive, procrastinating. Your sign is that of earthy Taurus, the second sign of the zodiac, the sign characterized by endurance and sensuality. Taurus is also associated with material goods. Venus, the planet of love and beauty, is your ruler, and makes you a very warm and faithful person. For the most part, eric, you are even-tempered and show a great capacity for affection, as well as an appreciation for beauty and art. You are loyal and reliable. You keep your promises. As the first of the three earth signs, you are realistic, patient, and persistent. You are the most grounded sign of the zodiac, preferring to put down roots and aiming for stability. Comfort, even luxury, is very precious to you, eric. And indeed, you rule the second house, the sector of the horoscope that encompasses money and possessions. This house describes your value systems, including the value of oneself. You are a fixed sign, eric, meaning you enjoy responsibility and taking charge. However, you are not a doer - you are a delegator! Like every genuine Taurus, it may take you longer to get involved with something, but once you do, you don’t want to stop. You are more passive than active, and prefer to have the world move around you while you sit still and direct.
	As an Aries Rising you face the world with intense energy and primal power, eric. You always look to go beyond your own limits and outdo yourself with every step. With each challenge, you learn more about yourself, and gain additional confidence to go even farther on your next adventure. Your incredible decisiveness enables you to act on your ideas the minute you form them. You don’t have time to waste! You are very competitive and have a strong urge to excel in whatever you do, and you continually prove your power through action. The downside is that you can be quite impulsive and often make decisions too hastily for your own good. Once you’ve made a decision, it’s difficult for you to go back and reconsider, because you only know how to move in one direction in life, and that is straight ahead. It’s no easy task to make someone like you back down. This irreversible strength you have inside allows you to thrive in some of the most powerful and influential positions in the business world, the ones in which the important decisions are made. If you have stopped climbing, it’s probably because you’ve already reached the top. It’s as simple as that!
	Your Life-Path number is probably the most influential numerological aspect to be considered and represents who you are at the time of birth. It indicates specific traits and will likely be active and influential throughout your lifetime. It is the overall number that determines much of what will be important to you and how you will handle things as they come. If your Life-Path number is FIVE, a love of sensation and adventure will likely be prominent for you. FIVE’S are very social and enjoy fun-loving light-hearted company as opposed to serious philosophical conversation. The average FIVE is not too worried about tomorrow but is generally happy go lucky. However, while laughter may be the drug of choice, many FIVE’S spend time searching for the answers to life’s questions. Those with a FIVE Life-Path are usually very versatile and progressive. Freedom and independence are of the utmost importance. As a FIVE, you will want to go about life completely unrestrained and will abhor routine. Your need for stimuli and adventure won’t tolerate repetitive and ‘boring’ work. Key qualities for a FIVE Life-Path number are expansiveness, vision, adventure, the constructive use of freedom.
	Sovereign in your kingdom, you exist to be flamboyant and exceptional. Like the mythic, fiery Dragon, you love to confront the enemy in battle, leaving the earth behind you burnt to a crisp, and hearts inflamed along your path. Great commander of the rain and fine weather, one must respect you when you talk, admire you when you act and submit when you command. An impetuous energy animates every one of your actions: you are ready to take on any challenge, go off on a conquest of power, and tear down any obstacle. If by chance you fail, you will never admit to being vanquished and will find in this snub a new will to conquer. An insatiable warrior, you become stronger after each defeat, and more invincible after every wound. Demanding of others, you are rather gentle on yourself and rare is the Dragon who recognizes his faults... Intelligent, lucid, and clairvoyant, you willingly bang your fist on the table when your audience doesn't share your point of view. You like to see life as a big adventure and can't stand it when those around you lack ambition. Your fault: A bit of megalomania and narcissism!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Please fill me with your Love and Light for the Glory of Father Son and Holy Ghosts... Amen.