I’m struggling because of what “I Believe”

Another Life: RE: Dade City et al connections....:
I’m struggling because of what “I Believe,” while I know she supports me as a graduate student, and knows I’m doing what no one else can do.  But . . lol. . .Maybe I need to just shut-up and trust it will all be as it must.  I’m the Engineer on a mission exchanging energy to get the same.

Sat Nam.

PS. sign up for this: http://wosonos2013.crowdvine.com/.  The author of the Open Space Book (Harrison Owen) will be there May 16-19 doing a World training.  I already have a student scholarship to it.  Susan, who is doing it up with Sharon Joy, attended this last one that I video recorded: http://www.starsusa.org/finished/chris-harvest.wmv

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you feel?

It feels really wonderful!  I'm really confident again.  I seem to go through these odd cycles.  One minute I feel like I'm getting chewed out and have no clue what I am doing.  Then the next minute, I'm leading and teaching where I am on top of the world, expressing divinity at such levels not known to man.

What do you see is common here from one to the next. . .

I get the sense of how I am the little kid in the candy store, again!  Where I can be so strong and confident in one moment, but then quiet and insecure in the next.  Maybe when I'm sure what I want and what my place is everything flows . . .  Like, I remember when I was selling candy in grade school.  Each week I would walk into the grocery store ready to pickup my supplies.  I knew exactly what I wanted, where I was going and what I was doing.  It was like I was invisible to anyone else, because I was a man (child, ;-) on a mission and knew that no one needed to know anything about it. . . LOL . . . but then when I was nervous and shy about it (bringing someone with me), suddenly everyone could see me, take notice and question me - - challenge me - - refute me!

What's the difference here?

I guess one is a place of power, and the other is not!

What else?

I'm thinking one is when I am full in my own truth, and the other is when I shy away!

What do you feel about your events these last few days?

I see how I was able to make a strong showing when I was clear in what I was asked!  When work and circumstances allow me to fill my place, I can see and fulfill . . .

What about when YOU CHOOSE to see the place and action before you, you can easily fulfill.  This is part of the most significant learning you need.  CHOOSING to see and ask for the light and guidance to see this truth and place for your power . . . not following, not being true and clear. . . stepping out alone, to be shy and fearful is not your place.  You Know who you are.  You know YOU created this all for you.  You ARE still the kid in the candy store.  Everyone around you is old a dying because you need to take the place and lead the change.  None can do this but you.  NO ONE because they did not sell candy for cash when they were 10 years old.  NO ONE because they did not understand or experience the American Dream, lie and deception so deep to the bone as you did.  Sure we can all claim this is a lie, or decided to avoid sugar and fat.  But YOU lived it, your beat the system at their own game.  Then you beat it and allowed it to beat you.  You played them better than they played themselves. . . and you did it in plain sight, right under everyone's nose without anyone knowing anything. . . Then you died from it.  This is who you are.  Remember your mission and goals are about CHANGE..

not little simple change, but BIG change, changing everyone an everything. . . you set this in front of you, and wrote it into your bones, your days and nights and everything about you flows from this.

I know, and I need to get busy.  Thanks!  I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.