Knew i needed to tell you something.... lol...

4.58pm 8/13/05 I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

I Am just sorta hanging out and Loving You Dearest Lord Jesus Christ.

Yesterday Dr JJ returned from his trip and dropped into the office. We understand each other very very well and it was almost funny. We even would get up to do things at the same time and accidently bumped into each other in the hallway twice (3x?). I guess it was him returning and me leaving at the same time. It was really kinda funny, and we also talked about all the tasks he left me. He was very happy about where the KLD data was going. The digital archives that Jessica did need to be redone. I added a few more missing volumes and found the format for her's wouldn't allow us to search through them. I showed him what i did and suggested ways to make it better to use. Took me about 2 hr for 2 years of articles. But the system is simple and I can direct an Intern to do it in the fall. He said that would be a great resource for us to do research.

Then we went over and talked about the website. I told him about doing things for sharon and mike. He was thrilled but also very strong in his position about them. He doesn't want anything to interfere with my job for him. But if i can do a hundred other things that's fine. WE seemingly have a lot to do together.... lol... a great great deal i know...

Why do you say that?

I Am convinced he has spent his whole life dreaming of publishing the solution of creation that God designed for us all... It's like every night i feel more of it. Then i awake at 3am to chant and see more and more come together...

What do you mean Son?

I Am always getting stronger and stronger pictures of what You want me to build. Like i see the waters moving all the time and that means people and power. It's such a fantastic trip as everything that happens to me in this community brings the pictures in my mind stronger and stronger. Whenever I bike or do anything i see how it all fits together. Like at the yoga center i can feel and see how much power and focus there is there. I get flashes of the transit system connection from her house to mine, and then down to Channel Side and up to USF.

Building a little loop first and expanding and expanding. One step at a time. More and more every day. And every event in my life brings more clarity to it. And I see how others are helping and adding to it. Everyone. Even those people who are mad or negative towards me.

They are the ones who add the most. The power and clarity of their focus is wonderful. and the results will certainly surprise us all. I Love you Lord Jesus Christ, Please Guide and Love all my family friends and associates here on Earth and Beyond for the Glory of God, our Father, Son and Holy Ghost.....

What are you doing now?

I Am listening to Heart of Champion By Carmen CM Radio.net 5.46pm

What are you doing now?

8.18pm Wow, I Am reading and writing and reading some more and more... there is so much going on here that i've got no clue what to do about it all. I know that I have so many things going on at once and that I will get all the help i need at any time and space that You like...

This is really about you. This is Your Dream, Your Creation. What you are doing now is bringing so much focus and clarity to the issues around your life that nothing will be able to stop you.

I like That I Am ...

Just setting these words down before you at this very moment is more powerful and clear than you will ever understand. there is no more time. everything will begin happening now. What have you seen with the hurricanes... start in africa...

I guess i once saw how a hurricane stayed in Africa and the waters and winds were so strong that hundreds and thousands...

What was it?

Uhg, ok millions of people died, and I saw the floods of water with all these bodies and the wild animals were taking over the land in a feeding frenzy. It was just the worse disaster mankind ever witnessed and it was a sign and a warning for them to wake up people and get serious about life on Earth... Not Greed, corruption and Control trapped in the ego.... But instead it was Truth in God...

The Power of Faith in Love....

And since then I saw it again and but it was Florida and not Africa. Like half the state was cut off from Tampa south where all the sand was just blown away... yucko...

I love you Dearest Lord Jesus Christ... Good night....

Why me and You too?!?

Amir called last night. She told me that Dave had borrowed some videos from Dan and they were dropping them off when Dan asked her for a ride.... just to get away. He stayed with her that night and that was already more than enough. I told her I was stunned to see her there getting him and really had no idea what was going on. She wanted to reconcile us and get things civil again. I told her it was too late for that. I had done everything that Scott recommended and now had a restraining order against Dan.

It was weird. Yesterday I ran around all morning dealing with this court BS. And then I picked up Andrew just as he had gotten to my house. He didn't know the locks were all changed. We went out to eat and just as we were finishing I called the courthouse about the injunction. I was thrilled it was awarded, and went straight down there to get it. It was like a great big relief. No more Dan insulting and harassing me all the time.

He got his 3-day notice for eviction and also got 2 weeks that he can't get near the house or me. It was SO NICE to go home then. I was thrilled. Amir decided she needed to get a box of cloths and stuff for Dan. She had gotten him a few jobs and she wanted to make sure he could do it all. I told her to be careful and when she arrived at my house a few hours later I showed her all of Dan's work around the house. It is sloppy and incomplete.

It's just kinda sad, but that is real, and he just wont face it. I've really tried to be honorable and respectful, but he just gets arrogant and belligerent all the time resorting to violence and insults. Not a very mature way to deal with the situation. But what can I do about it. Or should I say; I did exactly what I needed to do about it.

When i went to Yoga this morning, Wij saw the cut on my face and asked about it. So i told her what happened. She was really proud of me, no one should take advantage of me, and a 5o year old man watching TV and not paying rent is simply rediculous. Course when we went to lunch she invited another student who is a freelance journalist.

A very good writter who wants to start writing a lot more. So of course I want all the help i can get and we chatted about working together on a few things. Wij was such a delight there too, saying all kinds of nice things about me. I really haven't know Wij that long, I met her the same day I met Amir. But Wij has seen who I am and what I do. So this is all kinda cool. Like clearing my house and moving on opened new doors for me already....

Wij said that too. How I'm making things work, talking the dreams but then doing what it takes to make them work as well. That was really sweet to hear from her and I felt really good....

What are you doing now?

I guess I'm sitting in my office at school, typing and listening to the radio. I'm so happy about this office that I set up here. I fixed up a pot of plants from the Center and brought it in here. I'm busy pulling out all these weed sand such there that are perfect plants for my office. So I'm happy about them too.

What are you going to do next?

I guess i need to finishe a few things around this office and then start reading more and more. I need to get ino this research that I need to do.

What have you been thinking and planning in this regard?

I guess i keep thinking about the meeting with Dr. Jermier. He told me he wanted to go over all the ideas and such that I have about my own Phd. And I told another teacher here about that too. Then I said how i was really nervious about talking it all out with John and felt like I could easier with all the teachers together. Then I thought about how it could be an event, where I schedule a room and feed everyone while i really go through it all in detail. That is really kinda freaky.

Why do yo usay that? This is something you have waited all your life for, and every moment you are getting more and more prepared for it. Like this event with Dan. It was a very spontanious and specific experience. Nothing about this is left for chance anymore. There are too many things at stake now. And everything is going along exactly as it needs to.

So then she told me that John would never do that. Like someting about him being so much to himself. He did tell me that all the journal information was completly separated from USF and that I couldn't share or discuss any of it with anyone. So then I wondered about my own research. If what I do gets pu.... oop, WHEN what I do gets published it will bring a lot of attention and such to me and the journal. I sorta have always known that. but i've never cared, or felt anything about it.

Like it always feels so funny to think about the STARS issues with Kieth and Scott wanting God removed from the business. While me and God are all about Busines and what we do will be what gets noticed not another charity or something else that they work on. I guess it's something that I can feel coming down the pike.

What do you mean by that?

I felt like telling John would be easy, because he is an editor and will actually read all the stuff that has been written. I mean the spoiled little white boy that died at 16 after a mean motorcycle accident doing 110mph escaping police with no helmit on. That's a freaky story. But it's written down on paper since 1980. over 25 years of paper writing disucssions and events with God and some dead druggie. Course the druggie lived and witnessed how suburbia went from the happy free community to the locked, secure, paranoid prison of today. Children had to be locked into schools and also locked out of all the expensive tools and materials that made learning worthwhile.

What else?

I don't know. I guess what comes to mind is the lightning bolts. I've seen that in visions for years and years. But to FEEL it and watch it happen right before my eyes was really freaky. I mean it wasn't just seeing how lightning and thunder are created by God. It was more intense, watching and feeling it happen there on me. See look it happened again! Wow was that a real trip. And I guess i know it will happen again.

Actually I always see it happening in the court room. Like put your right hand on the bible and sware with me. And then it's like boom. Some conflict, lie and story is blown apart by God since the con has to end sooner or later. It's not there for you, it's there because everyone needs to learn and accept the truth that exists and not the stories that are made up by people to get control. Control over what? It's all God, nothing here is free or happening by chance. It is all created by our own energy and our own focus.

So I decided to make the cahnges that the world needed. And so the whole world and bent nad twisted to make it happen the way it will work the best for everyone. It certainly it not something very easy, but the commitment and dedication are there and that's what it takes to make things happen....

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Please fill Dan and Kieth, Amir, Dave Andrew, Equan Scott Chuck and my friends and family to make it and grow into the Love and light that only you can allow and create for the glory of God the Father Son and Holy Ghost! Amen.

Why me??? lol....

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ! 8.33pm starting this

What are you doing now?

Wow Dan assulted me again. First on the phone. I drove around with Keith all morning and then came home to find the house empty. THANK GOD. So i took the opportunity to look at the work sheet i gave to Dan. He's not been doing shit for months and stopped paying me rent again claiming he was doing work around the house.

So I told him it had to be written down or forget it. I even made a form up for him and Andrew like the Work/Study form at the Center. Then I told him that nothing I've done for him has worked out yet so we had to change things. $20/day, or 5 hrs work, or 2.5 hrs training Andrew. So i was alone at home and found the pad of paper and his form with the hours marked on it for cleaning hte kitchen floor and mowing the lawn. Here the font page of the pad of paper this is all put together in has a list of chores Andrew wanted to do for living here. Where Andrew marked he would "moe yard" and "vacumm floors" as his chores contributing to the household.

But now Dan wants me to consider these chores he's done as work for rent. I know he's barely ever done any chores, but how stupid does he think I am. So the last column of the form is labeled "office use" and I marked in 1/2 chore for cleaning the kitchen floor, but his work of 3 hours sealing it was fine. Then 1 hour mowing the yard was a chore for 8/3 but I can let the other 4.5 hours pass for fixing his own bike??? Cut and measuring the trim that I put in and the measurments he did on the Greenhouse.

So then I drew a line across the paper and added up his hours OF WORK. 16 hours for 5hrs a day that makes 3 days. So then he owes me for 4 days at $20 each, that's $80. Course one day when I told him all about this he dropped ...

1027pm scott called....
file a restraining order, call a lock smith in the morning or sooner, call the divorce lawyer in the morning about the threat from dan. Witness the inventory of stuff, pack it up and get it out. $200/ $160 888-7689 9-10am. 10 locks... 7 doors 3 dead bolts 45/call 12.5/key $170, 45 minutes... 1hour 971-1999.... 60/ +20/ lock... hour, 695-7700.... 45/ +10/key, 65/ +15/key 2hours, 238-1800; 55/call +19/lock 45minutes 237-5020; 55/call 19/lock hour, hour ...

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

At about 4pm- 1600 Mr Miller called me at my office threatening me, my family and children with lewd and harassing comments. I hung up on him and stayed there until 1900 before I rode my bike home from USF. I locked up my bike, checked the mail and opened the front door. After closing the door I told Andrew and Dan that if I ever got any more insulting or threatening phone calls from either of them that they would have to leave.

Dan immediately got up yelling threats and came into my face again. I saw Andrew leave behind him trying to avoid this situation much the same way I wanted to as well. Dan continued to yell standing over me sticking his finger in my face. I motioned to bite his finger and he dared me to. As I went by him and he called me a chicken hitting me on the side of my head as I went by. I grabbed my cell phone dialing 911 before I was in the next room. Dropped my bag and locked myself into my office. I told the police I had been assaulted and gave them my address and then hung up.

The police called back shortly and asked for more details if there were any weapons or anything. I said I didn't know, but was locked in my office and safe now.... Having locks for rooms inside of my own house. She said the police were on their way. Then I simply read my email trying to relax feeling the sweat from my bike ride still rolling down my face. Then when the police arrived I pulled up the pipe in the track of the glass doors and went outside my office. They said I was bleeding and asked me what happened. I told them how it happened so fast that I could barely understand what happened, except that I had been assaulted.

My God what a crazy day. Working and running around all day and this is what I come home too. I've been scared to come home for months and even dread seeing Dan's van in the driveway hoping that he would be out. Then I find the AC down cold and him laying on the couch in front of the TV while I'm working all day... every day... non-stop! Wow, I sound like I'm married complaining about a lazy wife. My GOD Does this all make me sick!

And Keith warned me about it, and Scott warned me about it. And even Dave across the street warned me about it. I mean it's been a year and a half and no one he's worked for has ever called him back. Oh except maybe his friend Tommy who was dying and died of cancer now, and Forest who has no one else to call on. But a dozen jobs, and several of my neighbors and friends have hired him but just once was enough no one ever called him back.

Why couldn't I learn. Why do I have to be such a sucker trying to help people out all the time.... Crazy and Rima came and got him. So he's over her house now.

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

Wow, things are really rocking all over. YesterdayI had to take Keith and Andrew to the Hillsborough High School to get them set and all. Amir was there too still working on Dave's stuff. Surprising to me, Dave and Andrew were not very friendly with each other. I'm not sure which one is playing ego crap, but I suspect it is Andrew. All the ego crap with Keith all the time, shows exactly to me who is lost in the toilet

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

clearing my data

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

I Love You Dearest Jesus.. Jesus is Lord by Blessed (CMRadio.Net The Best Mix)

What are you doing now?

I'm clearing my data on these computers. I have a lot of files about all this research. And I know i need to start reading and compiling more. Millions of links but very little read and compiled. I got my office set good this last week. And I'm ready to work. Even met one of the Dean's secretaries. They are so spoiled, clearly tensed about comtrolling their little fiefdom. It's so sad to see so many people lost in space like that.

But i also see how i'm lost in space too. Like Steve Bram' who got me into the school invited me to eat left-over lunch from the EMBA Program Friday. I sat with one of the GA's that work in his department and ate lunch. He and the lady serving it all were chatting about both being in the MBA program too. When i was leaving i could see Steve wanted to introduce me to someone...

Well i could feel it. They were at the next table where some professor was chatting up a storm; and i also could see they alreayd had enough going on there so i just left. I wasn't sure what esle to do. Interrupt to thank him for the invite.... lol.... so i just left on down the hall. I stopped in later again to get some coffee and the lady there told me to go to the Dean's office for some. Gaile introduced herself there, and said i got in before they dumped it out. So i guess i know about when to go there to get some.

What are you feeling now?

I Love You, that was really cool. I could feel how i've gotten in good already in the place. And i know there is really a lot there for me to do. Jessica and the office there was never very active. She has a few businesses she runs already and doesn't really need anything on campus. So me really using the space is a change. And i can see countless things i can do there too.

What are you doing now?

Well Andrew just came home. Gotta go...
I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Wow, Emily's Birthday this week

Sweet Sixteen, and never been... lol... yea right, never mind

What are you doing now?

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. I think I finally have some things going along the way they should. Or at least I'm learning to get it together right finally. It all really feels right too. I'm actually very comfortable and happy about things

What did you do today?

I rode my bike to school. And it was neat because i got down into my racing position a few times and really flew. It was really kinda neat, and exciting. I ride down 22nd around the ball feild. Carry my bike over the tracks, and then ride down Rowlett Park Dr. through the Park, down Waters Ave to 29th and into the Center. There was a big class going so i jsut dropped off some flers and cleaned up a bit. Then I race down Waters, to Yukon, 39th, crossing Busch Blvd at 4oth and then down 40th to the business college. Which i pass and ride to the gym, swim, shower and back on my bike to the new Bsn building.

I have no towel or anything at the gym. But i bike, yoga, bike and swim in litte bike shorts. Then shower in two streams of HOT water. put on the bike shorts again and bike to the bld. The basket ball courts upstairs has a whole lot of wind blowing out the door, so i blow off a bit. Bike to the bsn building and go to the men's room and change into work cloths.

It's kinda funny, since people look at me funny walking in in bike shorts, adn shirtless a few times.... but i gues i can't do that anymore...

What else happened there today?

Oh well the Executive MBA Program was having a meetin or class or something. They all get fed and such too. so it was kinda neat to walk into it. I spoke to Steve Bram' again and he remembered i was the kid with the weird program i was doing. He invited me to eat up left overs. I told him I was ast-editor with Dr. JJ and offered to edit/review his handbooks and such given to the kids.... So that was kinda cool. I met another guy who was just starting in the department as well.

What else happened with everyone else?

I guess Dan and Amir finally got together. But better still, Amir's son Dave and Andrew are really getting along good. They worked together today getting someones lawn done nad such. Dave said Dan was there too but he never did anything.

So What's up with Dan now?

I guess his van died. And he's not been brave enough to ask me for help. He has been trying to do more stuff around the house. but Andrew and Keith are here too. Keith asked me about Andrew and school, not wanting to send him south to Miami where his dad is spoiling his daughter. Like Andrew doesn't seem to get along with his dad either. And the schools in Miami are hopeless....

So i started Andrew on laying out chores. Which he dove right into. But then I told him he had to do real projects as rent too. I tried to get Dan to teach him things instead of doing the work that he can't see anyway. He's really being stuborn about it. Trying to work anyway when he really can't see.

Then he cooked chicken and rice. And i stopped in to get a drink while he was tearing up the chicken. And his fingers were still black with grease from working on his car. So i couldn't eat any of what he cooked. he said he sealed the kitchen and cut the corner molding to put in. it's still an 1/8" off. But i got to glue it myself instead of him drilling it all out as he had planned.

It really looked a 100% better with just the two strips along the kitchen counter. SO MUCH TO go still

Thank You Loving Lord Jesus Christ for Filling those around me with your Love and light for your glory, amen. Please be with Emily on her Birthday, and all those around me now... lol... oh funny thing, Equan and Scott have the same Birthday... lol....

"Who you Are" By Foreverafter CMRadio.Net The Best Mix 1209am
I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

But wow

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

Wow do i have a lot to do don't i... eeek, this is kinda freaky already... i wonder if everyone else is doin ok...

Please Dearest Lord Jesus Christ Help me to achieve all that i have to these weeks before school starts... Thank YOU!!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

wow 3:13pm on 7/31/05

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

So I'm in the office again. I really love how well I have it all setup. I almsot feel spoiled already, with my feet up on a pillow again now. Had a few cups of tea and sorted out all my crap here, creating some files for the current stuff i'm working on.

It's kinda weird. Recently Scott decided he did not want to be on the Board of STARS anymore. I've been wanting to talk him into staying, but maybe it's better if he doesn't. Just as he says this "Jesus Thing" is too much for him. I get a job to develop my research and make my place and focus clearer than ever. It's really this Jesus thing that can help express and define clearer than ever.

I guess it's all cool, I don't need to worry about anything.

Thanks you Love Lord Jesus!!!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

Wow you are so right... a daaa, like what else could you be anyway.... lol... so I never got to sleep last night until after 4am. Then I was awake by 7am, but tried to sleep until about 10am. Keith had plans with his son where Fred was going to pick them up so I made plans to get some tools together for the Center and also bring whatever i needed to drive over to USF too.

So I decided to go shopping and get a few things, buckles for the new straps on my book bag/Computer bag. I got some 1" leather belts to make into strapes. Then I went to Sams and got some food and such. And finally PepBoys. one day last week when I walked into the Center for Entrepreneurship and saw a professor in his office that looked like a dorm room with a fridge. He told me PepBoys had a real deal on a small fridge.

So wen i got there and looked around I found it. Then I found an electric water cooler. The Center has several water jugs around for getting drinks, which I thought I would get for my new office too. But then I saw a water cooler heater with a little fridge under it. WOW, all in one, for me to have tea and my creamer under it. So cool, so I bought it right them.

I'm in the office now. It's really cool I need to bring a pillow for my feet... course I have my feet up... wow this is really great.

What are you doing now?

Well i guess i finally got my shit together for you.

Yes this is correct, there is a great number of things that you can do now, and you certainly have a lot you can now do...

Wow I even bought some big snickers bars to munch on if I get busy and rushed around.

What are you doing now?

I'm trying to talk to scott online, i guess... not sure what's up with him anymore.... I can't have him leaving STARS now, it would make things crazy again. He's beeing stubborn about it all of course... still wants to have his way...

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

Ok wow...
This week was the first week with my new schedule. After I got the OE Journal job, I decided that I had to start ridding my bike to school. So I visited with Eel at the Center and we are like Brother and Sister.

I mean there are so many things we have in common and share it's really crazy. We both love to Bike and would prefer to be on 2-wheels all the time. We both are on PC's 90% of the time, working on them or making plans to. We both have a clear understanding about God and People. And even have the same Vision for the Center. I could write another 100 pages about this, since we both have interests in Yoga, and Research and all that stuff too. Even trying to get Kid-Centered Yoga going.

So anyway, the first day I went into to the center to work alone.... I wasn't alone! Monday 7/25/05... i could feel someone there watching me. It was weird. Then a few times I could feel the dream of making the place full and clear.

Course i then even saw all the land between 29th and 30th Street there being part of the garden and having a trail run up and trough the palce liske a river of water. Course that was the Sidewalk design moving water and fish now. But I could see how it was connecting the water to my house down across the river and how the water moved in a big circle. Course there were others there. But instead of hundreds it was only a few watching, helping, hoping, praying.... it was kinda cool.

I got a mat out and worked a bit in the Garden Room.

Tuesday when I came in I was jsut about to hit the shower and work out on the mat and I heard somone in the Yoga Studio upstairs. Oh great a teacher, so i can go tell her who I am and what I'm doing here, so if they hear me it's no surprise... And when I ran up, it was Cynthia. A very pretty, Dark haired, Dark eyed Goddess... who immediately welcomed me to her class....

Oh yes, of course i'm here for the class. We chatted a bit, and I told her what i needed to say, and the nstayed for the class. Wow neato stuff. I could feel so much power too. It was like preparations for stuff I do in the Chant. Like beginning moves to get the alignment right. Course I never can do that, so her lessons were really perfect for me. I go so the Kundalini anyway, but the Hatha Yoga gets the alignment and such for the poses I need to do.

It was really cool. And I later wrote Eel about it... saying wow, "love at first sight!"

The next day I got messed up ad bit with Keith needing a ride, never noticed my schedule and such. But I got there later for a bit. Weird thing happened then too. The plants are telling me what to put and move and where to work. Then the birds and butterflies too.

I heard this big squak and looked up into the trees to find a big while cockatoo, with all the mocking birds yelling at it. It seemed to have it's wings clipped, and wasn't flying too well. So I told him he was crazy to be flying around with clipped wings. It was funny talking to this bird, adn I told him to come down to me. And I could see him moving around to see me through all the trees.

Course as This happened i was swinging around my machetti for the plants, and ai cut my figure. Daaa... 2nd bobo. Then I felt to walk accross the street about a bandaid, and as I got there I heard the house full of birds and knew she could tell me what to do with the Cockatoo. The Bird flew over to follow me too. I must have woken her up, knocked three times before she came out. And she said how birds will hear her own and come oever to her house. So she opened the door to let him in.

The next day she said it left after I left, and she never saw it again. Then Thursday, I went to Wij's class, and we then went for Sushi. She even packed my bike into her car so I wouldn't miss lunch. BUT I forgot my back-pack and laptop so she drove me back ther again anyway.

Friday was really nice too. And as I was leaving I saw big hawk with the load mocking birds again....

So it was really a cool experience. I did my own Yoga a few times, and went to two classes. Last night I finall spoke to Eel about it all, and we had a great chat. some flyers done, some new ideas and al sorts. Really cool.

So she told me her mom's funeral was there in the garden and her ashes went all around in and down into the river.... Wow I knew someone was there watching and I knew I was making all the plants and animals happy. Guess I'm making her mom happy.

One day when I rode to school, I passes a dead red-headed wood-pecker in the road. Same type of bird as the nest with all the chicks outside my glass doors here. He had just been hit and was bloody still with no ants. So i grabbed a newspaper and picked him up. Layed him in the sun at the Center, and it was gone the next day. Big surprise. Then I also find a dead cat. This was on the bike trail through the park. I got him off the trail and took a little piece of the tail.

More weird stuff.... So i need to get moving now, and stop at the Center to bring some tools and do somethings before i go shopping for some other things.

WOW, what a week!!! First week of my summer break! 11.53am.. only an hour typing ... cool

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Who's Awake now?

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

Writing Keith ....

Yahoo! Groups : starsusaorg Messages : Message 980 of 980: "You took three days from me. And maybe more than you know since one of those days was July 29th, when the PE Exam application was due. The state lisence exam is an 8 hr test in Orlando they only give twice a year. Scott freaked when i intentionally missed the first one this year, thinking we had agreed i would do that immediately when I got into school, and i was crazy to miss and gold mine.

And so i missed it. Again!!
And then spent the afternoon trying to find a delivery service that could do a check for me to the FL PE Office. Course i didn't even find a visa card to pay until today either! SO now i've done a few dozen long distance phone calls from my office using a state line where i could lose the job, office, support and even be fined. I rushed out with no cell phone! This morning i finally figured how to bike, yoga, bike, USF, swim, shower, and dress RIGHT for work!!!! ((((FIRST TIME RIGHT ONCE!!!)))) Then, I even asked scott for an attorney's office in Tallahasse for a friend of mine who needed a favor... ALL Attorney's Deliver at court the last minute, with no notice or warning, and most accept Visa!

But if you would think of someone besides yourself, and remember what Scott said about this. You might realize that everything could fold in a flash of stupidity, Satan's work is at hand WAKE UP"

---

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

Writting Scott and Equan, but this applies to EVERYONE I copy too......

Hey Bud
Sorry that I seem to copy you crap all the time... It's easier than writting an additional personal note to follow. But in fact, I only copy things to you when i mention something you said or something that happened which could directly affect you.. Like here I refer to what you said monday night about me taking the PE exam.. which seemingly slipped our minds...

Reflecting each other.. God I hope i start to look and sound like Bear, instead of Keith or Dan!
Hope you had a good night. Not sure I will yet....
God Bless.
er;-)

PS, That's a joke, how people grow to look like their dogs... lol.... while I'm picking up "crap" from dan adn keith too .... Namase;-)
I am just Loving Lord Jesus Christ!!!

first this year

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.
I guess i can really do this now. and i see the time again 3.13am
this is chant time!

But there are 2 single dads with a kid each here now. So to chant and drum and all is really not possible... 3.16am

OUR Evolution

OUR Evolution
Cain: Yep All our taxes go to a data center which constantly checks and rechecks... until we are all comfortable with the truth and AGREE!!!! De-JA-vu!!! feel it!!! it's ALL feeling!!! There is nothing ELSE!!!

Abel: We've been here before? or lived this generation already?
Cain: We just all know and share it this second!!! And soon all the worlds will know the truth http://www.geocities.com/stars2man/Gods.htm!!!! the equation is SOLVED ..... we ALL are mater and energy... and we MUST UNIFY!!! We use the integral as a summation of all that IS!!! We are the solution, as we understand, accept and APPLY THIS FACT!!!
Abel: Well Unity is first before peace and abundance Unconditional love towards all

I’m not afraid of anything. Thank You Jesus Christ!

What are you doing now?

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. I AM Finally listening strong enough for what i need to do.

What are you doing now?

I Love You! Fulfilling Your Glory!

What are you doing now?

I Love You , trying to share this enough to define it.

What are you doing now?

I Love You so much, thanks for making this possible.

You made this possible Son. You have Listened, you have felt, and you have responded. What are you doing now?

I Love You .... i guess i finally got to write as freely and sincerely as You asked me to

Yes and you are ready too, as we all are. Read more, no fear, you will be surprised about how this works out for you. What are you doing now?

I Love You .... 2.30am now I look at the time i started to post, and remember the post is a webpage, and webpages have automatic clocks.... to i can set this up to record the times for every key stroke => and e=mc2 compare this to all the energy fluctuations of the earth. Like yesterday keith went Jolking and shared how he had another experience with God and the rain!

Yes, as he will more. the rain is coming again. What are you doing now?

I Love You 2.38 Note to keith:

NOTE: NO WORDS, You have wasted my time again. Flyers for sure
before 1am. Eric Hr 1= keith 10, Driving 1 = keith 100 (time stamp?) ew;-)

Mr. Mic

From: Eric
To: Chuck
CC: Keith, scott
BCC: Sss , Tim, Rowan , Joyce, , Laura Lynn, Claire, Dr. Katz, Sharon, Koehler, Rev. Jerry Johnson ,
Date: Wed Jul 27, 2005 10:00 am
Subject: Fwd: STARS Meeting stars2man

Mr. Mic,

'Adding Values'
That's always been your job!

Thanks for looking at and considering thie progress.
I know by the Grace of Jesus Christ, EVERYTHING will Be as it Must!

I look forward to your insights whenever possible!
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/starsusaorg/message/978
www.starsusa.org


Thanks again
Sincerely

Eric R. Weaver
Project Director STARS USA inc.
O - 813-237-3705
C - 813-679-5195


Eric R. Weaver
Ed. Asst. Organization & Environment www.coba.usf.edu/jermier/journal.htm
College of Business, University of South Florida
Department of Management, BSN 3215
4202 East Fowler Avenue Tampa, Florida 33620
Telephone: 813-974-1757 Fax: 813-974-1734
__________________________________________________
-----Original Message-----
From: Keith [mailto:kidovid2000@yahoo.com]
Sent: Tuesday, July 26, 2005 11:46 PM"

Saturday,July23,2005_6:12:14PM

Saturday, July 23, 2005
6:12:14 PM
I was really depressed with my son. It seemed like nothing had gone anywhere again, which just annoyed me. I mean Dr. Prange is supposed to be the professional and he’s really got no clue what to do or how to deal with this.

Then I started to work with Eel at the Center. I’ve always known I needed to work there and just never could find a way to do it, or an excuse to bring me there every day. Now I finally found a way to ride my bike to school every day. I have an office at school so I can keep stuff there. Then I can ride half way to the Center and do stuff there until lunch time and then go the rest of the way to USF. I made a schedule and figured it all out too.

Thursday,July21,2005_1:36:28PM

Thursday, July 21, 2005
1:36:28 PM
I finished my final last night, it wasn’t as bad as the last one, but I’m not sure how my grade will do. So far it looks like this next term will be a lot easier that I thought.

What Really Makes Us Happy

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

When your dreams or "end results" are stated generally, in broad brush strokes, like wealth and abundance, friends and laughter, health and harmony, then please, by all means, Eric, attach yourself to them. Attach, attach, attach. There is no limit to what you can have and no reason to expect anything less.

But when your end results are specific, like the ultimate car, a hot date, or a home in the country, do not attach, do not attach, do not attach.

Material details and specifics are always "how" to get to a grander picture of your life and are never important in and of themselves. They're "cursed hows" disguised as end results. Steps disguised as destinations. By all means, think of them, put them in your scrapbook or on your vision board to remind yourself of the kind of possessions and adventures that are your birthright, but do not give them an importance, through attachment, greater than what you are truly after: a fuller, richer life with all cups running over, the details of which will take care of themselves, when this is your end result.

Bok choi, baby -
The Universe

I know, no attachment, no expectations, only intentions of bliss followed by the will to follow my insight, instincts and directions.

What happened last night?

I had some intense Dreams , visions and all.

Write them out!

I know right from my dream journal, next to me bed. . . .

1.49am
I'm in this great house for a wedding spending a few nights there when the bridesmaids brother tries to kill me. Like we are going hunting and need to get some things out of storage. So we go down into this deep deep closet full of bags and equipment and gets me to start pulling things out an pitching them up to him. More and more comes out and deeper I go down into this chamber. Then suddenly he starts throwing things back in on top of me and soon I'm trapped and losing my breath. Then I realize what he's doing and bury him instead.

So now we are dueling back and forth and he gets a knife. So I get one too. But it's really weird like I get him buried again and it's like i get his house now. Like hie sister was really jealous of the Bride marrying another lady. But now I find his sister just wanted him gone so we could have the house 1.59am

Sky Sent on the CD Player now

Then he keeps getting out of the closet and coming at us with a knife so we bring him back down into the closet again and walk back into the main room of this big old rustic cabin and start cleaning up. There is this great bed like 30' to a side and the mattress is down on the floor, and the box spring next to it where we could just get by in the room. So we pick up the mattress only like an inch thick in places because is been warn down from years of use - generations - 2:22am and we place the mattress back on the box spring and go into the next room and I see him coming out of the closet again like a zombie or something . . .


So now I have a beer and got ready to Chant and I felt how this whole story of creation again. Where Adam and Eve return to be creation and Savior but Eve is still lost in materialism. So Adam has the solution for all the world, but no one believes him but Eve, and she wont come help because she can not resist him so wont allow herself the time with him wanting to stay in control . . . . to her own demise and that of everyone's . . .

2:26am So I wrote the dream and it was 2am so I knew to Chant. As I prepared I flashed into Jaclyn and she was with me doing this Chant each morning in Harmony and We WERE GRID FIRE, so much you could see the Grid Lines going across the grounds of the church, like faint sun beans. We had gotten the grant and were teaching MS kids how to heal . . . it's all done, Gardens and Children playing everywhere . . . The classic Hero's Story. . . CHANT TIME 2:30am

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Amen!

gofer or something else?

Tuesday, July 19, 2005
6:57:18 PM
Wow what a busy month. I can’t believe all the crazy things going on now. I’m finally getting more serious about who I am and what I’m doing here. It’s really kinda cool and inspiring. I spent the last few days with Eel and cleaned up the gardens at Center a lot as well as rebuilt their steps. It turned out really good and I had fun talking with her. As it turned out she is very interested in making the yoga center work, more to help people than make a profit, though the profit is necessary to keep it open. She really wants to expand it into medical research and has a passion for experimental design and applications.

No I’m not dreaming and I didn’t make this up. Really, a yoga center that needs a manager, preferably a live-in manager to help expand it into medical research and heart opened teaching and training. Wow, I couldn’t have asked for anything better.

---

Eel Hi again...
Do you follow this email below? Is this familiar to you too? My first feeling was that I've got more books to buy and read, along with all those you mentioned... but what do you think and feel from this???

My first feeling is "mindfulness" seems like common sense to me. I CAN'T drive while on the phone. I always turn off and park to talk with someone. It's like what's life without BEING fully in the moment to see and feel all there is here for me? I mean are people really this dead? All living through the TV of fantasies in the mind?

Wow, weird???
Thanks
eric

PS. Thinking about my calendar again, all the green will be healthy-biking, Yoga-practice, Center-fixup, Mayan Chant, focus-on-energy sadhana time... while the red and black will be strictly school work, research, reading time... not necessarily actually show up and leave times.... Oh and am I sorta your intern now vs. slave-laborer.... lol... gofer or something else?

---

Guess I needed to ask? Lol.... wow is this a funny life that I’m in now. It’s very weird and very strange for me to keep up with. But I like it. Everything is really cooking up nicely and I know I can get and do everything that I need to. Which is really cool.

Son, you are getting very good at following what we place before you, and as you grow and improve in these things, everything will get easier and easier for you. There is really nothing to fear, and nothing will slow you down. Yes a great many things are coming together before you but you are very clear and sincere about it all, which everyone sees and supports around you. There is nothing to worry about and these things are only going to get easier and faster for you. Please be clear on your desires and needs.

Please Loving Lord Jesus can You take care of my son and my finances so I can focus more clearly on Your Purpose and Plans before me for the Glory of God the Father, Son and Holy Ghost, Amen.

What a nice way to ask. Very good Son, you need to stay clear and sincere like this.

Ok, Loving Lord Jesus, can You also help each of us in this house with the tasks before us tomorrow for Your GLORY! Amen.

Why sure we can!

Please Dear Jesus, WILL You take care of ALL THESE THINGS for me!

Certainly Will!

Thank You! I love YOU!

Sacred Cows

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What are you going to do about it then?

Dear Lyn,
Again I've tried to avoid you and all the psycho drama you are trapped in. I got out my book again and the next chapter was written for you too. I told you everything there was to know about me and still you prefer to make up some more psychodrama to live and pursue instead. So now I'll write you again knowing you will never read this or find it. But I need to get it out of me...

The next Chapter was about "Sacred Cows" - - the excuse we make up for not being real. Oh I'll exercise, grow, learn teach or whatever "AFTER" I finish this that or the other thing... Some crap "sacred cow" that we use as an excuse for avoiding our own truth. People love saying how they can't reach and achieve UNTIL something else is finished. Oh what the hell, I'll stand here and hurt my sore arm some more scanning this in for you... no big deal if you learn, it's worth it - - for Ciera's sake if nothing else...

Yes of course I know you're suffering... no one looks God's Gifts in the face and says "oh not good enough" without suffering... I mean everything you told me about seeking, asking for, pursuing was exactly what I am doing. . . NOW, not tomorrow, not after grad-school or after the bank account is big enough - - BUT NOW. It's all here NOW. Wondering why you are not here too?? Oh HELL I Don't I know... maybe tomorrow is better for saving the world . . . there will be more people then, less Earth, less Trees, Less birds, and Fish and Forests . . . as if you care . . .

Oh well So I got it all out . . . Ok Jaclyn so Leave me alone or use th phone. . . THANK GOD, yes I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Oh, and here's the book chapter for you.
Namaste'
eric



Sacred Cows
You can prepare yourself for your journey to the Upper World by ridding yourself of limiting beliefs about love, power, money, and health, such as: "I'm not good enough," "I don't deserve it," "Soul retrieval won't work for me," or "I'm too burdened by responsibility to change." Other versions are: "When the kids grow up, I'll change," "I'll practice yoga when I have more time," or "When I have enough money, I won't work so hard-and I'll eat better, too."

We hold on to these limiting beliefs, or "sacred cows," because we think that they'll provide us with security, but in reality they prevent us from achieving the one thing that will allow us to experience the magic of the world. We convince ourselves that if we get rid of the sacred cow, then we'll have nothing left. In other words, we think it's better to hang on to what little we've got than to have nothing at all: Better a bad relationship than no relationship; better a bad job than no job. For example, one of my sacred cows used to be my fear of not being able to support my children. I kept telling myself, "When my children are grown, then I'll dedicate myself more fully to my calling as a writer and a healer, but for now, I have to do the responsible thing and work at the university." One day when my children were still little, I left the university and headed into the Amazon. It was on this trip that my mentor asked, "Alberto, do you want to live like an eagle or like a chicken?"

Of course I didn't want to live like a chicken! But there's a lot to be said for having the security of regular feedings in a chicken coop, as well as for the barbed wire that keeps out the fox. It's the barnyard equivalent of the corporate job with a retirement plan, or in my case, a university teaching position with a regular salary. But I also knew that many of us leave the chicken coop only to remain stuck on the ground of the barnyard-that is, we look longingly back at the coop, lacking the courage to take off and fly.

I had to face the fact that if I wanted to soar with the eagles, then I had to make some changes in my life. I had to give up the security of a teaching position to pursue my studies in the Amazon. At the time, I was one of the youngest members of the university's faculty, and I had a promising future in academia ahead of me. My decision meant sacrificing everyone's expectations of me, along with all the ones I had for myself.

However, after a few challenging years, my new career took off, and I was able to provide for my family with abundance. I no longer taught at the university, but I began lecturing around the world. My sacred cow had been hindering my ability to experience true success.

Letting Go of Limiting Beliefs
A sacred cow is the last thing that you want to lose or give up, and it might be something that you think absolutely must be maintained. For instance, I was once called in to consult with a company because its founder felt that the business was stagnating. He told me that he was willing to change any- and everything to improve the situation.

Well, after meeting with all his managers, I discovered that he was what had to be changed! The managers knew that the company was in trouble, but they were afraid to tell the boss about their difficulties with his management ideas. The company's founder was the sacred cow that had to be sacrificed in order to make any significant change.

I broke the news to the president: He had to fire himself. He ended up promoting himself to the board of directors and relinquishing day-to-day operations to a new generation. After that, the company began to flourish, and the employees were happier and thus more creative and productive. And the founder was able to return to the big-picture thinking and strategic planning that he'd always loved. He felt more fruitful and was rewarded with the joys of business partnership for the first time in his working life.

You see, a sacred cow is the limiting belief that we confuse with reality. It's always the one thing that we don't have the time, money, health, or courage to do, yet we must be willing to attempt in order to become whole. It's the thing that keeps us doing what we've always done for much longer than we should, even when we know it's wrong. As a client once told me, "My job is a nightmare, but I need the sleep." Even though he hated going to work, this man clung to his position, choosing to sleepwalk through life rather than risk exploring what it would be like to sacrifice this sacred cow and plunge into the unknown. Yet even though the risks are often enormous, the risks of sleepwalking through life are even greater.

When we cling to our limiting beliefs, illness or hardship may result. An acquaintance of mine who's a university professor kept telling me that when his retirement plan was fully funded, he'd finally do the things he wanted to do. Unfortunately, before that could happen, he died of a heart attack. The lesson here is that you can't always wait: You have to let go of your limiting beliefs so that you can journey to your destiny.

Of course this is easier to say than to actually do. I'm reminded of an old Indian story about a group of parrots who are in a cage at the palace of a sultan. An old bird tells the others (who were born in captivity) about the blue skies and how delicious the mangoes are when you eat them from the treetops, and how great it is to soar free beneath the clouds. One day, the bird-keeper accidentally leaves the cage open, and the storytelling bird says, "Go, my friends. Go and fly. Greet the treetops for me." One by one, all of the parrots fly out of the cage-except the one who talked them into it. This old bird just wasn't willing to sacrifice safety for freedom.

Limiting beliefs are always held as dogma. For example, the Italian astronomer Galileo was brought before the Inquisition in the 17th century as a heretic for supporting Copernicus's theory that the earth orbits around the sun, which was directly in conflict with the teachings of the time. This poor astronomer was criticized by a world that didn't know its proper place in the heavens, so he abandoned his investigations of the movement of celestial bodies for years after he was reprimanded by the Church. Nevertheless, he felt compelled to go back to his calling, defending it even before the Pope.

Galileo had to sacrifice the sacred cow that claimed our planet was the center of the universe, with the sun and stars spinning around it nightly. Even though he was kept under confinement for challenging this belief, by staying true to his destiny in the face of overwhelming danger he made discoveries that forever changed the course of science. Galileo's ideas were held to be false at the time-yet today they're universally accepted, and schoolchildren everywhere learn about him and his discoveries.

Just like Galileo, if you want to scale the highest heights, you must do so even in the face of rigid dogma and adversity. Your friends and family won't believe that you're leaving the job, career, or relationship they consider perfect for you-they'll think that you're following a fool's call. Yet answering your calling means that you only answer to one person's opinions: yours.

The Call of Destiny
It's possible that you may receive a calling to a destiny that even you'd rather ignore. It's tempting to say, "I'm not ready to do this yet-I'll do it at some other time. I'm comfortable now." But when you don't respond to a calling, you risk the wrath of heaven.

In the story of Jonah and the whale, for instance, God calls to the poor shopkeeper and says, "I want you to go to Nineveh." And Jonah responds, "No, I just want to have a simple life. I want to be a shopkeeper, and I want to be around my children and my grandchildren." Jonah ignores his calling, gets on a ship, and sets off in the opposite direction from Nineveh. A huge storm rises, and the sailors know that someone has incurred the wrath of God. Crestfallen, Jonah admits to his fellow seafarers that he's the one who has done so. To save themselves, his shipmates throw Jonah overboard, and he's then swallowed by a whale that transports him in its belly to the shores of Nineveh anyway.

While in the belly of the whale, Jonah recognizes that his calling is to spread the word of God. When the humble shopkeeper is regurgitated by the whale in Nineveh, he then begins to teach-but he had to go through immense hardship before accepting this calling. Jonah's story teaches us that if we don't respond to our destiny of our own free will, we're going to be taken there anyway.

The call of destiny is an otherworldly one. It's not a menu choice between chicken and fish-it's a force entirely beyond our control. But we do still have the choice: Do we respond to the call of destiny on our own, or do we wait until an illness or personal crisis compels us to stop what we're doing and follow our destiny?

For many years I wanted to avoid my own calling. Every time I told myself, "I just want to have an ordinary job and a regular life," circumstances would conspire to bring me back to teaching and healing-I'd get sick, or the career I'd planned for myself wouldn't work out. I discovered the old adage that said, "If you want to see God laugh, make plans."

Accepting my own calling was always fraught with challenges-I had to face many fears and difficulties. For instance, after my first book, The Realms of Healing, was published, my co-author and I were chastised by the ethics committee of the American Psychological Association for promoting primitive "superstitions." Many of my colleagues believed that I was wasting my time studying "unconventional" healing, and even my own mother would ask me when I was planning to get a job. In the end, none of this mattered: I had to listen to my calling.

As you can tell, the call to your destiny doesn't always come in the way you expect it. For example, President Franklin Delano Roosevelt grew up in highly privileged circumstances and lived a life of success before being struck down with polio at the age of 39. But it was only after he was stricken with the disease that he embraced his destiny and achieved greatness on the world's stage. Aside from becoming one of our most effective and long-serving Presidents, Roosevelt also put in place a grassroots campaign that funded the discovery of a vaccine for polio, which stopped transmission of the disease that crippled him and was then terrorizing the country. Roosevelt didn't succumb to the belief that because he was disabled, he was powerless; to the contrary, he set in motion a healing that was far greater than his own personal illness. Roosevelt took a crippling condition and turned it into a healing crusade for others, transforming him from a man of privilege to a man of destiny.

There are many other such stories of people facing extraordinary obstacles and overcoming them, or of turning challenges into opportunities. Just think of Helen Keller, who was both deaf and blind, yet overcame her handicaps to learn how to read and communicate, and eventually became the first deaf and blind student to graduate from an American university. She went on to tour the country, inspiring thousands of deaf people to learn to communicate at a time when people with such disabilities were considered mentally ill.

Great individuals show us that we can sacrifice our limiting beliefs to change the nature of the quest from mere survival to destiny. So, what is your destiny? Is it getting accustomed to your limitations, or is it to change the world? The way of the healer has always been to discard limiting beliefs and turn them into sources of strength and inspiration. When you sacrifice your sacred cows, you no longer have any excuses that you can give to Spirit. There's no longer a disability to surmount before you can be of service to the world, or a child to rear before you can become a writer. There is only the resounding yes that you say to life.

Exercise: Identifying Your Sacred Cows
In this exercise, you'll identify and shed some of those limiting beliefs that keep you from living your destiny. You'll do this for each of the four strands that are woven into your momentum tunnel: your love relationships, power, money and career, and health. For each strand, fill in the blanks in the following sentence:

When I ____, then I will be able to _____. Be as specific as possible, and be honest.

Here are some examples of answers you might come up with:
1. Love relationships
When I find the right relationship, then I will be able to:
- be happy
- be fulfilled
- stop feeling lonely
- feel lovable

2. Power (psychological and emotional strength)
When I get over my anger at my mother, then I will be able to:
- accept my daughter as she is
- be more in touch with my femininity
- have confidence
- be open to meeting a man

3. Money and career
When I find the right job, then I will be able to:
- learn to meditate and practice it daily
- be more peaceful and contented
- travel
- become an accomplished chef

4. Health
When I'm not suffering from chronic fatigue, then I will be able to:
- exercise regularly
- learn to cook healthy meals
- deal with my unhappiness
- become active and fit

Look back at your answers. The first blank in the sentence is the sacred cow, the limiting belief that keeps you from advancing in life, while the second blank is the journey that you must be willing to embark on, whether or not the first blank occurs.

Despite the simplicity of the exercise, this tool is very revealing of your limiting beliefs. Since you have a whole herd of sacred cows, this exercise should be repeated often, delving deeper each time to reveal your most deep-seated beliefs. Used rigorously, this exercise will provide a doorway to your destiny.

Can I explain it all?

Tuesday, July 12, 2005
6:03:54 PM
So Keith’s back. He went down to Miami to deal with court. He got into a thing with a few cops and still has it hanging over him. Course there is nothing I wanna do but avoid them all together.

I know I need to talk to Keith and Dan about the BS here in this house. But I’m really not up for it now. Nor do I really feel like doing anything at all. It’s like I did take on too much again. Lol... or am I really doing anything now. Wow do I need to get busy. And it’s all right before my eyes, and I can’t wait to make it all work. While I know I need to chill a bit now.

Why do you say that?

Because I know you are here to talk.

What makes you think that?

Since you are ready and I know I am too. But it’s still really weird for me.

What are you thinking, it’s all at your fingertips again and no one can see or do anything here but you. What do you think about it now?

I’m a bit nervous now again. I mean I know it’s really only beginning so I can only hang on and do what I can. I mean, I’m not really sure about a lot of things again. I’m just whining now aren’t I?

What are you afraid of, you knew this was all meant to be and was very clear and specific for you now. There is nothing to fear, and everything is exactly where it needs to be. We can talk about it all night or you can start making it all happen now.

can you play critic http://www.starsusa.org/usffolder/TuesdayJuly12-05.pdf be blunt it's easier that way... lol... wow...

11:03:06 PM
Wow... and to see the numbers in this Word interest tool {alt}{it>}before I hit {enter} to load them. It was 11:03:03 before the 11:03:06 came up in the file. Sometimes I just feel the power of the numbers so much that I’ll soak it up for a bit... then when I finally hit enter and see another number, I change it to where I started. That’s what I feel whenever I write. Like I know You are here with me Jesus Christ and I want to fulfill my commitment to You by witnessing to Your Glory as I see YOU right before my eyes.

What a nice thing that you do.

Oh cool, thanks I’m glad to hear that it’s what You like.

Whatever you do we love. It’s always bringing you closer to God. We grow and evolve with everything you do. It’s just important to stay balanced and in truth. No fears, but balance, and light in consideration and nothing less.

Please loving Lord Jesus Christ can You continue to lead and guide those around me to succeed and fulfill Your power and truth alive in Us NOW..... thank You Loving Lord Jesus Christ amen!

---

Jiwan;
Yes this letter I wrote is really heavy... lol.... especially with all the links...

http://www.starsusa.org/USFFolder/TuesdayJuly12-05.pdf

I had planned to talk with you about it today, never thinking to send it to you. So when so many people joined us for lunch I didn't worry about it. And likely would have been happy to talk about it anyway.

Yes I don't talk much about anything else... I'm very focused on the tasks before me... too focused.... I wish i could relax and just chit-chat more, that would likely stop me from being single... lol... all in time...

So here's the link to the same letter, with all the other links... wow... I'm curious what you think about it... also I sent you a reminder to send me something else... course I don't remember what you were going to send me???

So send me your flyer for class, so i can print more to poast around USF. Also can you give me the list of Kundalini teachers in NY too. I want to send that to some friends up there... NJ too if there is one...

Thanks... Lunch was great... I'm sure your trip will be too... take care...
Namaste'
eric

---

Dr. Marshall,
I will be in the SMA class this Fall and would like to review the old reports that have been submitted to you. Do you have them in your new office or are they still in the Center Office? Can we schedule a time next week for this?

Actually, I'm planning to compile a list of sources that we can use next term for finding the best background for future report. Therefore the digital bibliographies would be the best thing for me to review if that is at all possible.

Congratulations on your new position.
Thank you

Eric R Weaver

---

Thank you Pam!
The classes were wonderful.

I was able to video tape the responsibilities as you asked. I think it turned out good. It was over 30 minutes long, so I'm not sure how to send it to you. I'll see how much I can get onto my PC and see how I can save it to send to you. Whether a DVD or something else. I might even be able to stream it off my server for you, but I'm not sure yet.

Thanks again for letting me join your class. I did leave a little early, so please tell me what you did in closing the weekend.

I’ll write again soon about the videos
Namaste
Eric

---

American Again

Monday, July 11, 2005
11:49:12 AM

James Madison followed the 10 commandments
Washington farewell address national morality with GOD
American Again by CarmenAbe Lincoln, school room philosophy now is political climate next year

Sunday,July10,2005_11:36:36AM

Sunday, July 10, 2005
11:36:36 AM
Of course Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ, I am always here for you. This is really a very interesting class and group of people. I’ve connected with a few and done a lot of cool stuff. Most are very clear and strong. It’s really kinda cool. And I guess I’m getting ready for something more that I need. I’m always getting more and more to do and deal with... that’s really no surprise for me and it’s kinda nice too. I’ve only got a few weeks left for all my USF classes, and then I need to get very serious about writing and setting things up with my new job and what I’m doing there.

I can’t wait to get my bike going to school every day. I just need to time it out to figure how it’ll all work. I'm sure it’ll be no big deal, but I need to start it slowly and seriously so I can get into everything good.

I AM a Mission from GOD

From: Eric
Date: Fri Jul 8, 2005 2:50 am
Subject: Re: [stars2heaven] Re: DNA Consciousness Theories stars2man

Wow, when things start moving, they really start moving....

I guess this is what I asked for, what I wanted and looked for..... So Jesus worked it out exactly how GOD would BENEFIT the most! Here is one last Witness for you about Jesus in my life!

I AM here for Jesus. SO WHEN I DO MY BEST, Jesus Christ Lives to the fullest through my heart. I can EXPRESS the Holy Spirit of Jesus by loving myself and loving others around me every moment. But I must start with me. I must take myself seriously first and get healthy and strong enough to get things clear with others around me as well.

Look I'm 16 again, died and come back again, riding my bike to school again, like I always LOVED TO! Thank you Loving Lord Jesus for Sharing this with me!!! Let your Will BE DONE!

WOW, Jesus, these people on this list share this with me too... watching all these weird things you share with me. Sharing in Your gift of light here with us. WOW, I goofed and deleted them all off the list? How did that happen, oh well Your will be done Christ Jesus, Thank you for reminding me to get serious again. . Amen. (list is open/public http://groups.yahoo.com/group/stars2heaven/ for 3 days, hit msgs n search it once ...lol... & no more from me, no more time no more.... lol...namaste e;-xxoo)

Matthew 7:3-5 (New International Version)

"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.

I'm On a Mission for GOD!

Monday, July 04, 2005
8:11:11 AM
I've started searching a bit, and downloaded the patent submittal stuff for filing online to the patent office. I’m not sure if that was how the Larsons did it or not. But that's ok since I know what I need to be doing.

---

MayanChant MayanChant@yahoogroups.com, Tim, Scott, Rowan, Claire, Dr. Katz, Chuck, Dr. Koehler, Kristin, Laura Lynn

How do I get into this? Did You read the FIRST Journal Article yet? http://www.starsusa.org/USFFolder/GettingRightWithNature.pdf
I got the job to help the editor on this now, and he said he'd love a "Letter to the Editor" about it.... Nature, God, Man, Unification, Love = GOD... here we go again, do you think I can get it right this time... union, summation, integral of all of it... http://eweaver.myweb.usf.edu/resume/equations.GIF I got all the players: http://eweaver.myweb.usf.edu/map.htm and they gave me an outline:
http://www.starsusa.org/USFFolder/IntellectualMerit.pdf

---

Critique this for me now:

Everything is God, everything is Love, and everything is this One Same Energy of Creation. As Creation, as God, we ALL seek to create and express with this Energy of Creation. Thus our “Consciousness of Love” or creation is the primal energy form of existence. Creation is Energy, like electricity and heat are each forms of energy. The Energy of Creation can be measured and studied. We can feel it and see it. We create when we make love with a person procreating children. As we can create in Art sharing a vision of a new being. First we create in life with physical union to another and then we Create in space through intellect and paint in union with the canvas. Love and Unions are the Energy of Creation.

As another energy form “creation” can be changed into matter. All creations on earth can be reduced to math equations: like E=mc2. This math conception can be used to represent how energy (e) or electricity or electrons changes into Matter (m) moving at the speed of light (c). Light is the photon of Matter (m) moving at a high speed (c) to create the energy of the electron of consciousness the same Energy of Creation.

Electron of consciousness refers to how the electron is the measure of consciousness. It is consciousness (C) that moves at speed (c) C = c being the Energy of Creation while only the electrons can be detected in our nerves. The Energy of Creation and the Love of God is in our nervous system, in our being and can be measured as well.

It also can be used.

We understand how the electron and photon are fundamental components of life here on earth and we create with them. Once again we can use math equations E=mc2 to understand how to create things. And all of them are created. All things exist because of the “energy called Creation.” The energy of all existence is Creation. Creation is responsible for the Photon’s Light and the Electrons charge. The Light for photosynthesis and the Charge for attraction, mater bonding, magnetism and materials are all made of Creation.

Creation is the consciousness of GOD. Creation IS GOD’S LOVE. Creation is God, God is Love, Creation is Love. I can create with you by forming a loving union with you. The proton and electron create atoms with Love, with a Union. The power of Creation, and Consciousness, and Love that Holds the atom together is the Love that holds us together to procreate offspring.
This union of matter and form is fundamental for creation. The union between the photon and the electron create the atom is also fundamental, it is the same knowledge of creation.

What are you afraid of?

I’m not sure I can get this all done and all together yet.

Why not son, it’s all very clear to you. You told Keith very clearly how The Way of Life and Creation is The Way of Jesus Christ back to God the Father. Your Way, My Way, The Only Way. It is ALL GOD, so it all returned Here over and over again.

So I shouldn’t worry or be afraid of anything at all. I know it’s exactly where it needs to be. Everything is, it always is and I’m just the dumb fuck who died at 16 just to come back to play the prodigal and sign up to make this work for US.... lol... wow reminds me of another 4th of july: http://webspace.webring.com/people/ls/stars2man/newpage38.htm

www.astrocenter.com: Your Free Weekly Horoscope Service
Date: 4 Jul 05 00:00:00 +0000
Hello eric,
Here's your July 04 to 10 horoscope.

New Family Goals
This week and the next mark the start of a new phase, eric, as Saturn prepares to move out of Cancer, into Leo and the home and family sector of your solar chart. You can probably sense the change already. You are likely getting ready for that feeling of relief when it comes next week. But just to give you an early start there is also a New Moon in Cancer on Wednesday, which offers the chance for fresh new beginnings within this area of your life. Time to think about writing that book, teaching that class, getting your marketing materials organized and getting in touch with anyone who may have missed you. You have two weeks to get going. Wednesday is brimming full with new ideas that are going to bubble over into action. You can hardly wait. Both Mercury and Venus in Leo sextile Jupiter in Libra, so there are going to be some changes to your lifestyle and home situation, especially if Saturn has any say in it. Perhaps you are preparing for a whole new phase, like a birth or a move. Mars sextiles Neptune on Thursday, so you may not be in the clearest of states with regard to your career situation. Don't make any snap decisions at that time.

Hello Eric W,
Jul 04, 2005
Transiting Mercury Square Natal Jupiter
STICK TO THE FACTS
The challenge now is not to let one conversation, fact or detail get blown out of proportion. You may overstate your case or run into others who lack mastery of their subject. Big talk and big words get attention, but can create expectations that are difficult to fulfill. Use this time to study, to fill in the gaps in your knowledge and discover whether your theories are fact-based or faith-based.
In addition, other influences can add complexity to the day.

Jul 04, 2005
Transiting Venus Square natal Jupiter
WATCH YOUR APPETITES
You can have a lot more fun than you've had in quite a while, but could also be prone to excessive habits in your daily routine. It's all right to eat, drink and be merry. Just don't keep it up for too long, since you may not know when to call it quits. Think up a plan of action for how to conquer the world. There are opportunities all around you. Just muster up the confidence to set things in motion.

New Moon in Cancer
Wednesday, July 6, 5:03 am PDT
The New Moon in Cancer is usually a return to source, the home, family, instincts, ideals and habits that form the core of identity. But Jupiter in Libra and Mars in Aries square this New Moon, pushing us into connections with ideas and individuals that branch off from our familiar roots. Defending against the new is a fruitless battle that cannot be won, regardless of how much rage is poured into the fight. Take your seed and plant in new terrain where great care will be required to make it grow, but where the rewards can exceed your highest expectations.

Saturn in Leo
Saturday, July 16, 5:31 am PDT
Our responsibility for the next two years is to develop the creative potential within each of us. We are building hearts, constructing courage and training the inner child to apply its talents with commitment and dignity. Each of us is a potential hero, the star of our own show who brings unique light to the human family. Don't shy away from your ego and the need to be noticed, but use it to make love more present in all of our lives.

Saturn opposite Chiron
Thursday, July 21
Saturn in self-conscious Leo opposing Chiron in collectively aware Aquarius is a reminder that none of our wounds are entirely personal. There's no need to keep them private, project them or compound them with shame. Meeting across the membrane of vulnerability is a way to redistribute pain, loosening its hold and making healing a basic part of all our relationships.

Full Moon in Capricorn
Thursday, July 21, 4:01 am PDT
The Full Moon in Capricorn is like a meeting of your personal security council. Should you return to the safety of the Sun in Cancer shell or toughen up to claim your place in the world? This lunation is especially complex with Saturn conjunct the Sun, Chiron conjunct the Moon and Mars square all four of them. Going forward, then, seems the wisest choice, as long as you balance the push for accomplishment with some gentle self-care once in awhile.

Sun in Leo
Friday, July 22, 10:41 am PDT
The Sun's annual return to its home sign is more significant than usual this year due to Saturn's presence there. This is a time of shedding light into dark places, and courageously sharing your talents with the world. Take the risk of going too far with your personality, rather than holding yourself back, especially if you tend to be the shy type.

Venus in Virgo
Friday, July 22, 6:01 pm PDT
Recognizing the mechanics of relationships is the gift of this transit, a valuable activity as long as the voice of analysis doesn't drown out the sound of your heart. Recognizing where there's room for improvement is a great way to refine your talent, but make sure that your criticism is constructive and gentle.

Mercury Retrograde
Friday, July 22
The communication planet turning backwards in Leo (until August 15) tends to promote stubborn thinking and holding onto positions out of pride, rather than reason. This is a good opportunity to recognize where matters of faith are not really matters of fact. Backing out of positions that no longer serve your growth is appropriate now.

Mars in Taurus
Wednesday, July 27, 10:13 pm PDT
Forward moving Mars tends to bog down in hold-your-ground Taurus. Patience is the key to making progress; slow and steady wins the race. A positive effect of this placement is sensuality, an unrushed pace for pleasure that can reduce fears about intimacy. Enjoying the process is more important that reaching the goal. Filling the senses with experience makes the journey more delightful.

Chiron in Capricorn
Sunday, July 31
Chiron makes one last visit to Capricorn before returning to Aquarius on December 5. The wounds of thwarted ambition and overamped expectations can make a Nobel prize winner with an Oscar feel insecure. If the pressure to get ahead is too strong, this is a good time to back off a bit.

This is an Act of God. I Am here on a mission from God. He told me what to do and I’m just doing it. When we understand a law of nature we can use this law to create and change nature.
Everything is God, everything is Love, and everything is this One Same Energy of Creation. As Creation, as God, we ALL seek to create and express with this Energy of Creation. Thus our Consciousness of Love or creation is the primal energy form of existence. Creation is Energy, like electricity and heat are each forms of energy. The Energy of Creation can be measured and studied. We can feel it and see it. We create when we make love with a person procreating children. As we can create in Art sharing a vision of a new being. First we create in life with physical union another and then Create in space through intellect and paint in union with the canvas. Love and Unions are the Energy of Creation.

As another energy form “creation” can be changed into matter. Many creations on earth can reduced to math equations: E=mc2. This math conception can be used to represent how energy (e) or electricity or electrons changes into Matter (m) moving at the speed of light (c). Light is the photon of Matter (m) moving at the speed of light (c) to create the energy of the electron of consciousness the same Energy of Creation.

Electron of consciousness, refers to how the electron is the measure of consciousness. It is consciousness (C) that moves at speed (c) C=c being the Energy of Creation while only the electrons can be detected in our nerves. The Energy of Creation and the Love of God is in our nervous system, in our being and can be measured as well.
It also can be used.

We understand how the electron and photon are fundamental components of life here one earth and we create with them. Once again we can use math equations E=mc2 to understand how to create things. And all of them are created. All exist because of the “energy called Creation.” The energy of all existence is Creation. Creation is responsible for the Photon’s Light and the Electrons charge. The Light for photosynthesis and the Charge for attraction, mater bonding, magnetism and materials are both made of Creation.

Creation is the consciousness of GOD. Creation IS GOD’S LOVE. Creation is God, God is Love, Creation is Love. I can create with you by forming a loving union with you. The proton and elctro create atom with Love, with a union. The power of Creation, and Consciousness, and Love that Holds the atom together is the Love that holds us together to procreate offspring.

This union of matter and form is fundamental for creation. The union between the photon and the electron create the atom is the same knowledge of creation.

Sunday, July 03, 2005
12:18:02 PM
From: "Astrologers" weekly@astrocenter.com
To: "eric" stars2man@yahoo.com
Subject: www.astrocenter.com: Your Free Weekly Horoscope Service
Date: 4 Jul 05 00:00:00 +0000

New Family Goals
This week and the next mark the start of a new phase, eric, as Saturn prepares to move out of Cancer, into Leo and the home and family sector of your solar chart. You can probably sense the change already. You are likely getting ready for that feeling of relief when it comes next week. But just to give you an early start there is also a New Moon in Cancer on Wednesday, which offers the chance for fresh new beginnings within this area of your life. Time to think about writing that book, teaching that class, getting your marketing materials organized and getting in touch with anyone who may have missed you. You have two weeks to get going. Wednesday is brimming full with new ideas that are going to bubble over into action. You can hardly wait. Both Mercury and Venus in Leo sextile Jupiter in Libra, so there are going to be some changes to your lifestyle and home situation, especially if Saturn has any say in it. Perhaps you are preparing for a whole new phase, like a birth or a move. Mars sextiles Neptune on Thursday, so you may not be in the clearest of states with regard to your career situation. Don't make any snap decisions at that time.

What else could you expect?

I’m sorry I thought it wasn’t proper for me to “expect anything”

What are you here for then?

I guess I’m just doing whatever you set before me.

What do you want out of it?

I really want peace and freedom to fully express the divinity that you have given to me in helping everyone to find divinity; Your divinity in Christ Jesus.

What did Keith do with you this morning?

He went to church with me. And I was all embarrassed about it.

Why do you think?

I’m not really sure. It’s just kinda unnerving. I’ve got all these weird things happening in my life, and I just feel like I’m hanging on.

What do you think would happen if you just let go? Do you think you will fall?

No I’m not afraid of anything.

What are you doing now?

Eeek, fixing feathers... and I need to go do that now....

12:46:46 uh oh, Dan’s home. I’m not ready to speak to him without Keith around. While Keith will certainly say I need to speak to him while we are alone. So I shut off the radio in my office and turned it on here with my laptop. But I still hear his voice on the phone a bit, which I don’t want to of course. So I guess I need to go do some more feathers... I love your Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

What do you think Dan needs to teach you?

I’m not sure about anything right now....

So I copied all this above to Joyce... just to say I Love You.

But I also know I still need to talk about Keith and Dan. They are both here to help me figure things out. If I’m changing the world and making things work. I need all the help I can get.

What HAPPENED NEXT

Hum, I guess I wrote a lot of emails, Joyce, Kelly, and then played with feathers again. I know they’ll be fine, I just need to know that and let them come out the way that they are, not the way that I think they should be.

What are you going to work on?

I need to check for school work and then do more Journal reading/work.

4:01:30 PM
So I’ve been online and such more than anything. Just opened my school book and I start falling asleep. Wow am I beat.

9:14:31 PM
I know I need to write an article about another patent. And I also need to file another patent. I need to do a methods patent search and begin looking for the details to write up a new patent. I know I need to get busy on this and I know that I need to do a lot of school work too. But I can only do so much at a time. And baby sitting grown men just interferes with my purpose and priorities.

7/2/2005 12:21:11 AM
Ugh. I have searched for truth I’ve searched for peace... 12:25:53 AM hum, freedom come when I lay it down ...

What DO you think? Are you ready to see everything come together for you?

Yes I guess so. But I’m always nervous about everything too.

That’s good. Then you can take your time and be slow and careful about what it is that you want to say and do. It’s important and will certainly fit together just fine. It’s not your problem if anyone else understands or believes you. It’s all there for you to do exactly as you’ve dreamed for years.

Sweet piece of God come over me... like a gift from heaven ... Thank you Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ... amen

http://www.starsusa.org/USFFolder/mainResearch.pdf
http://www.starsusa.org/USFFolder/IntellectualMerit.pdf
http://www.starsusa.org/USFFolder/GettingRightWithNature.pdf

---

KS list post:"mEL"
"PaintbrushInSpring"
"Dale Morrow"

I shy away from Dragons for a long time too. But then I learned how they are of the earth too... just as I am. Sure something about how the reptilian races came here to dominate and rule...But actually only helped us evolve out of the water onto the dry land... lol, we had them fooled...

Then I thought to bring this energy into me as well. We are here to make peace and union with our world not divide or separate anymore. I was fearful at first... feeling like I was growing spikes down my back. But then I realized it was more like wings... and they sprouted feathers... angel wings not dragons.... No fear it's all here for us.

So now I've been given two Hawks and a Sandhill Crain. Lots of feathers for me to work into my rituals. The birds are all around me too. The Osprey had another litter behind my house, and the redheaded woodpecker has a nest full of chicks in the old oak behind my house.

Aren't the birds something that evolved from reptiles too? Hum, does this make me kin to frogs too? lol...
Namaste'
er;-)

---

Still hanging out trying to do my school papers and research for class. I’ve really got a lot to do still. And I’m making some progress, but not as much as I want to.... yet.

I LOVE YOU

Friday, July 01, 2005
8:17:07 PM
So I’ve got a new job, that I’m really excited about and I know I need to do a lot of things, too many things. Keith is here ready to help now, so I need to get him focused as well. He thinks Dan is a lost cause. Or that Dan will only do what he has to just to get by and not do anything more. It’s kinda annoying. But that’s about what I’ve been saying all along.

I love you

7/2/2005 12:21:11 AMugh. I have searched for truth I’ve searched for peace... 12:25:53 AM hum, freedom come when I lay it down