Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

Why don't you write about it all for a while. . . express your feelings . . .

I just watched all this cool stuff come together that was really just awesome. I couldn't really believe it all. . . So many great incredible opportunities just coming together out of thin air. Somehow I see all these things, and just jump on them. It's really kinda freaky sometimes how this happens to me and no one has a clue how I can get into so much.

But it keeps happening. Funny yesterday I was challenged again to really describe things. I wax over the feelings and only define the issues. Only describing the events and never getting into the feelings.

This morning the Speaker who came into my entreprenueral calss was very clear and dynamic about the whole concept of business being the connection to people.

Course what do I always have problems with. I mean, I connect and understand things very deeply into people, but never really do anything about it. Seeing Susan sing in church once comes to mind. I could feel her hurt and after she was done I just gave her a big hug. She admitted she was hurting from some fight with Jerry. I knew it, no one esle did. No one else responded. Hum, I do that all the time. . . . feel the pain in others and respond to it.

Of course in my class the speaker and I connected together very well. I walked right up to him, or I followed him in before class started. . . . Not even thinking we had a speaker today. Just as I placed my bag down wanting to run to move my truck that was illegally parked, he turned around to say hi and shook my hand. Later on during a break I went up and asked him about helping me put together an advisory board. And again at another break I looked in my bag and found I had my transit patent there and the Vision picture. So I gave those too him too. . .

He spent a lot of time with it too, looking, reading, he liked it, I could tell. He said something too, like "hum". . . Then put it into his jacket packet.

The three major things he said about all business, since all businesses are the same anyway, is

1. your biggest competitor is yourself
2. you can't get into business that you don't know about
3. people do business with other people

Course that' s what my life is all about anyway. . . I'm always challenging myself to do things that are just beyond reason and insurmountable, impossible, never been done before. I ALWAYS get stuck with this kind of thing. No other tasks come my way. . . Ever! It's ALWAYS about beating myself, and my biggest enemy is myself . . .

THEN I always know and see how I can do it and make it happen, anyway. Where I constantly push myself to do things that seem to be beyond reach but I try anyway. And I get stuck with doing things with people who never listen, understand or are ready for what I can do.

WOW. Just had a conversation with John about it all too. We always understand each other at some very basic level here at OE. . . . . .

Thank you Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ for making this opportunity for me to serve you. Please lead and guide me to more fully express and comprehend all that I have before me to do for your glory.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

You still need to express yourself . . .

I know it was great to talk with John who came into his office today, and understood my challenges, and knows what I need to do. I told him about my meeting Monday with the Rotary; so he said how I needed to get focused and clear about what I wanted to present Monday. . . . He went through a lot of things that made a lot of sense to me. Then I followed him to get us dinner with Barbara in New Tampa and I picked up a book at his house after that.

When I got back to my office John called. Suz's brother had finished the Celestine Prophosy book I dropped off for him yesterday. . . WOW. Nothing is coincidense, everything happens perfectly exactly as it must for us to complete what we need to do.

So John was telling me about the book, and said how the Mayans dissappeared.

WHAT?
Yes, there is a section describing how they increased their vibration too high and vanished.

WHAT!?!?
SO I WANTED to give him a link... no pc there yet! And I started to laugh as I realized that the same thing happened with his sister... no links for her at first either. So now I've printed somethings out for him and am ready to go there. 10.49pm

Thank YOU dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ for your strength love and Wisdom! Please lead me into your strength love and Glory; amen.

Yahoo! Driving Directions - Tampa, FL

So the other day I got an IM message from SUZ.
I remembered her ID and asked her where we met. . . After a few moments she said Susan James: the Majic Wall.
OH WOW!!!
I know YOU!!!
I have a MAJIC HOUSE!
Everything I see all around me ALL the time is TOTALLY majic reminding me of the truth inside of me ALWAYS.

It's really was such a total TRIP, since she UNDERSTOOD EXACTLY what I meant. 11.09pm "STARS LIGHT.. Let your faith be know, threw a megaphone.. Tell the world what you are about..." Let it Out By Aaron Benward on the radios now of course... lol....

It was SOO cool to meet this part of me again, wow. Complete understanding and comprehension, almost mystically relating to the pictures and all of my life and experience. OH COURSE MY WEB SITE WAS DOWN... Yes all of it gone, so I could NOT show her anything... zippo... no wedsites, and links... none,, oh hold it i found the old scire ...lol...

I bet that's something I need to go look at again. I had to explain it in words instead of "here look" and leaving people alone to figure it out. MY GOD, I never work at explaining things to anyone.... And that's what I did with SUZ.

She was stunned, flattered, impressed,.... Interested, and reviewing, hum even recommending pages to others within a few days as I got the server reformatted again. It's really kinda cool how much she knows and does this stuff already, and really likes it all... Yes, she's flattered me a lot too.

It was just a trip...
I was flying again like I AM 12 now!... Ok 21... lol... ;-D)))

Then a week or so later, with a few thousand lines of chat already, downloads, videos, photo albums, even WIKI corrections!!! WOW! TOTAL synchronizing and coherence, blessed beyond reason in every aspect. . . . lol... Except her daughters aren't single... lol... GOOD THING, she's in AZ (of course)

OH then she remembers her brother John is in Tampa.

WHAT ?
Another John?
I mean John A. Jones who's mom still lives in the house behind our NJ home; is the only family I've spoken to in months. . . . Oh and Chuck and Joni who are always around and ready. . . . and Equan!

Oh Yes, "JOHN" her disabled brother would love to talk about moving energy. He lives in Tampa too...

WHAT? lol, not only is he in Tampa, but the Treehouse in about half way between us. He's just opposite me on the hillsborough river.... I pass his block on my way biking to USF...

No I mean, his space feels directly on the opposite side of the River on the meridian of this Earth... LIKE WOW!

Yahoo! Driving Directions - Tampa, FL: "Starting from: my house 2008 E Patterson St, Tampa, FL 33610-1068 Save Address
Arriving at: 7517 N 40th St, Tampa, FL 33604-4518 Save Address
Distance:2.7 miles Approximate Travel Time:7 mins Get Reverse Directions

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you need?

I know I need to work on a thousand things at least.

What you have before you is what you have been asking for. If you are really serious about making this all happen you have all that you need here at your hands. You keep wanting it all done waiting and hoping for someone else to do things that only you can do. Like your first conversation with Dr. Nord, no one could say or share that. You understood he was open for it and you shared it; responding to his dreams in ways that you will never fully understand.

Then again when you spoke to him. He listened and smiled, you did all the talking, and you got things out that you never even considered before. That was very important for you. You need to see that you are the one that needs to make this all happen. . . Waiting and hoping someone else will be able to do something for you is really just a joke.

No one can do anything unless you tell them to. Very strong and clear statements will only work if you are sure of yourself. Like speaking with Dr. Nord. Each time you were very strong and clear, no question in yourself about what you were doing. You never considered it ahead of time; BUT IMAGINE IT YOU HAD! You know you can say and create more than anyone can understand. And you don't need to concern yourself about what they understand or do not understand. . . You ned to just do what you know you can do.

I know you always make it sound so easy. . . .

Was it easy to speak to Dr. Nord. Each time it was really easy for you, and you need to stop worrying about it and simply make it happen. That happened there because you needed it and wanted it to happen. Not because anyone else had anything to do about it. Like everything you saw start this week. You made it happen because you knew you could and because you wanted it all. Not because of anyone else. . . . This is about your will power and YOUR desire!

I know.

Then stop your waiting and excuses, decide what you want to see and make it happen. Like your presentation you need to do now. What do you want to see? Do you want to impress for success. . . . Then do it!

I know I need to get busy on it all.
Thanks Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

You see this short and sweet writing is a lot better for you, and everyone.

Thank you Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ, Please continue to fill me with your Strength Love and Wisdom for the Glory of God the Father Son and Holy Ghost amen
I love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Here we go.... Again... lol... Hey didn't I say that already?

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

Do you really want me to write this much. I know there is a lot for me to do and a lot has happened.. But do I need to write it all out?

What are you worried about. You asked for this all to happen that way. Everything happens at once whether everyone is ready for it or not. That's the way it always happens.

I still can't believe how much I wrote already. I kept feeling people read it over and over all day. Then tonight I went and spoke to a bunch of people about it too. There was a Water conference over in the EDU building that I raced too right after class. Dr. Echelberger was there. I passed out like 6 cards, four USFers' as a student looking for a graduate program. And then two as an engineer. . .

It was really awesome...
First person was the Rotary Govenorese who know Dr. Palmer by name and wanted to invest more in that work. They just started a student chapter and were looking for projects to do. I'm sure I'll but a link here for it soon . . . I told her I wante to builda river walk to clean water for the city. I already had city designated park land where they are putting in a trail for me. . . .

lol. . . I know I need to write him a letter again too. He needs the sanitary Dept Loaders!!! LOL! And I'm building a recycling center anyway... lol...

Then I gave an engineer card ... lol.. "We move rivers" still.... lol.... He was involved in privitizing the water systems locally. So I told him how I modeled all the rivers, Hillsborough and Alafia. I could tell he didn't believe me of course . . . . lol. . .

Then there was an engineering teacher and a public health teacher who were both proposing inter-disciplinary research. . . . The engineer was talking to the Center Director (Patel place who put on the conference) when I got to her. And of course the Director had spoken to John over in business just last week...

Oh I work for John now, please give me a copy of your strategic plan too....

So I gotta send him an email too.

oh forgot, the other engineer card went to a guy who was working with "engineers without boarders" . . . I told him how I looked them up before to get data for flooding in Venezuela. A friend helped build a school there that always gets flooded.

What did you just feel?

I felt how I need to be calling people on the phone instead of trying to email them...

What have we been telling you about your med school proposal.

I know I need to call all those people too. And I will Monday morning . . .

Will you get it done this time? You said that last Monday too.

I'm sorry.

What's important is that you get this done. You asked for the direction and the tools. Now it's time to get busy with it all. Everything is here for you again. You asked for it, so follow it through now.

I am...
I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Thanks for your Strength and guidance in each task You set before me. . . . For the fulfillment of Your glory Amen.

Wonder if I'll go to another UNiversity?

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What are you nervous about.... you are holy, holy... the universe declairs you majestry

I sent something to Dr Nord and copied John, Sharon, Koehler, Claire, Katz, Budd, Klasko, Jonoska, and Heidi ...
it just felt so good getting it all out of my system again... and I know i need to chant....

What are you waiting for... get it done... get busy . . . . no fear son, just fo it...

I know, i know... it's only 1:44 am now... lol.. usually i chant at 3pm... 3o1am... lol.. 3o3!!!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Thank you for your grace Love and Wisdom... Chant time ... lol... wild ride tonight I know it's coming.... since it's already 2.03am now...
Please fill me with the Strength Love and Wisdom I require to fulfill all that you are ever to be here through us all now for the Glory of Father Son and Holy Ghost, amen 2.07

Now What?

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you need to write?

I'm not sure. It's kinda weird as usual. I'm been more open and clear about who I am and what I do and things just surprise me still. I finally rode my bike to school; wow does that feel so good. As I got to the building I passed Dr. Nord who was walking across the parking lot and said "Good Morning" as I passed him.

Course I was totally charged racing up on my bike. Back by my house the Osprey was chirping at me as I passed him, so I said hello to him too. Then the ride through the woods was just perfect and wonderful. So when I hit the road again going past Busch Gardens, I could feel all the people watching me pass the traffic on my bike. And I knew I could use that focus to create change. So I asked about it. And I could see the transit system of water taking me in. So then I thought about how the system could work with bikes really easily. . . . Allowing bikes to ride on water. . . . Visions always growing and changing. . . lol.

So I immediately fell into visions of how this would all work and going to Architecture right then to lay it out. Course last night Sharon asked us to look up the Water Wars issues for class which is getting to be a big deal. Of course water is all about sustainability. . . And the foundation for my big picture designs and everything I've ever wanted to build and design anyway. So then I felt and saw how the deal with my two classes and all could pull this together and make everything work right.

Not big companies taking over everything, but people taking the rights over their water, land and resources again. . .

OF course that's what the meeting Sunday was all about with the business plan team.
So I parked my bike and then walked down into the business building and there was Dr. Nord walking up towards me. Suddenly I realized that I was in the perfect place again. I need to get two Directors into STARS and have this business plan and Sustainability classes to design and create everything with me.

What will you do?

I'm not sure. . . You told me to come in here to write what I needed to do before I did anything. So I'm writing. I know it's 2.15pm now and I started at 11.41am. So I've read and studied a bit too and even have started a letter to the BSN Plan team since I tried to get them focused Sunday and still never got anything done. . . I felt like I was talking to myself. . . lol. . . typical!

Why do you say that?

I never feel like anyone understands me. They all get lost in the details and never see the big picture. . . sustainability is not about water or recycling it's about people working together to solve the big problems that corporate greed and corruption have caused.

Why didn't you say that?

I don't know. I just say what I can. . . You know I try to allow your inspiration to guide me

We know and that's what you are doing again now. No worries, be happy... Trust yourself son... Read and study as you need to...

I will. Please Lead and guide me to fulfill your glory . . . Be with all I know and love. Amen
I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What's up?

I'm really not sure . . . . I'm at USF again, and I did everything I needed to for John already. But I know I still have a lot to do.

What

I need to call around to all the faculty I've spoken to about my research...

What's the problem with that?

I'm nervous.

Of course you are. Think and feel how you will make it happen, and you will not be nervous anymore. You've dreamt about it, and felt all sorts of pieces and aspects coming together exactly as you know they need to. Have Faith. Remember what Equan has said . . . Have faith in your convictions

I know but I'm still nervous about things

What do you expect, that will fade as you work more on things... Trust it and let it be as you feel it must be...

I know Dearest Lord Jesus... Thank you for your help...

Ask and receive son

I know. Please fill me with Your Strength Love and Wisdom so I may achieve for your Glory... Amen... I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!
Wow, BIG moon out there. . . . I know what I need to do tonight
And I guess I know what I need to do tomorrow too.

What this is for you can be anything that you want. It's time to do what you need to do. And making things happen will never be any easier for you. . .

I Pray You will continue to fill me with Your Strength, Love and Wisdom for the glory of Father, Son and Holy Ghost, Amen,

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Morning Has Broken

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What are you going to write?

I really don't know...

What are you feeling?

I just finished a book Claire told me to read several years ago by Peter Senge. . . . Of course I want to write him. I always want to write people I read like this. Dalai Lama comes to mind, of course lol....

I would start off telling him that Claire told me to read it. And I met Claire when she ran the Florida Regional Data Center. I asked her to make me a list on their listserve to query teachers to create projects for credit. I wanted to write a fortran program to compile skills and interests so I could create new classes and projects....

My thought was that Peter will recognize that I was asking for a webpage from a mainframe listserve before there were any webpages. . . . lol. . .

Actually if he's really bright, he would recognize that I was creating the energy, the conscious desire for creation of webs and sending it out into the world.... lol. . . adding to the conscious power web that made the first webpage...

What's the point? Do you think he would listen or care?

I know you want me to do research and get out there more. So this would do it for me.

What about the VP and all the people you've connected to in Tampa?

I'm not sure about that right now. . . . Scott and Chuck would rather argue and blame me for being 'unrealistic' or whatever ... when all i required is that they follow up al lthe talk with really working together and getting something done. Course they called my bluff, essentially kicking dirt in my face blowing another serious opportunity. . .

What happened with Chuck and Scott had less to do with you than you know. All you did was watch, and describe what you saw and heard. They wanted you to create a business and take a more active role, while you simply choose not to. It was all their business and work anyway. But they were doing it for you, and you needed to make it happen. And could at any time, land and rain will never go away.

I guess I need to make it happen with Klasko too. He is likely reading the same books too. And I can just do it. Lol, see if I "can do it" lol...

well I guess that's what I will find out this next weekend. I am having my entrepreneur class team come over next Sunday so I can show them what I'm doing at 9.33pm 7 days. . .lol. . . Or 6 days, 15 hours, 27 minutes... lol..

I realized that the passion for the recycling project was MY PASSION, and I really hadn't shared any of it with them. I mean, I'm building a sustainable world, not just a recycling program... lol...

Oh so Dr. Senge, you see this patent I did is really simple and I would love to apply it to something you work with as an interesting experiment. . . .

WOW, that's a trip. I can have everyone on Earth testing my Theory. . . lol. . . YOUR THEORY!

Laws of nature are Men's theories, we already know the answers. What point is a theory to us? Besides helping you to learn and share more through them....

I guess that' what I asked you for isn't it? I wanted to solve your problems here on earth so You could come down here with us. . . with Me. . . ? Wow, is this about some personal relationship and desire? Daaa, Of course it is! Everything is about finding the real passion in myself
CHANT TIME!

I love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ... Thank you for this Power and truth in Your Passion! Amen 9.58pm

What a week...

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What do you need to share now?

I'm not sure? I've been sorta relaxing and enjoying my peace and quiet. . . I seem to have pissed off Scott and Chuck who seem to have both called my bluff. Well they both are high and mighty, always trying to take care of poor little Eric, who just doesn't know any better. . . Yea watch out for Eric, but control and screw every deal he's ever attempted. Course it's always my fault too.

What did you do?

I essentially told them to make the deal without me. . . Course my requirements were unrealistic, so they could never make it work. . . lol. . . Yea I required that they work together and create an "Equitable" deal where "we" could run everything together. Not sure what blew it for them, the "equitable," or the "together". . . Maybe they couldn't handle the "everything"... But whatever it was an hour or so later they both told me forget it. . . And both resigned from STARS. . .

good riddance... Feels like a breath of fresh air... Like I can finally do whatever I want to do. Course my first thought was to get the Med School VP on the Board and really Rock. I always wanted a School Official and then also a Student Organization official on the board with me. Then every term they might be re-elected or replaced while I could make sure everything went right as I have planned.

What do you have planned then?

I guess I invited my recycling team over here to lay out a new business. I'm great at getting business going and started. So why cry over spilt milk, especially when it only opens up a better deal for the rest of us. Then I think poor Sharon never really knew what I was doing or wanted to do. . . . But what's funny there is that she's unknowingly done more for my efforts than I could ever ask her to do. I guess it's really kinda funny, because people always get lost in the control aspects. Everyone wants control. . . lol. . . Except me. I would rather see it work and be successful than control it.

What did you just feel when you said that...?

I thought about the Learn and Serve programs and Volunteers and Honors stuff all modeled after what I did. They are working and successful, but still only make more bureaucrats instead of more students. Sorta like a band-aid instead of the real cures I created. . . lol. . .

What would you do differently?

I guess I really don't know, but will find out sooner or later, as I'm sure I will have the opportunity. . . Thank You Dear Loving Lord Jesus Christ, Amen
I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. 1.36pm

Son, you listen and LOVE!

YES, I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Here we go.... Again... lol...

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

We like what you have done. It's good to see you confident and strong. There is never anything for you to worry about. And this is exactly what you want and like to do. Just tell others what you want to do and see it happen. No troubles, or arguments. . . .

I'm getting nervous about what I sent out again. I can feel it. Oh, like someone is reading something I sent out. Oh wow is that all that I'm feeling now?

That is right, everyone is starting to feel more and more all the time. What you are feeling is as you have said. You can feel a lot more of them all the time. It's not something to get concerned about. Just add more Love to it. When you feel another connection, just love it and say it is good and perfect like it is. Do not worry, know it is PERFECT, accept and love it for the power they send you in reading something.

I still get nervous.

Why do you need to think about it. You have a lot better things to think about. What are you feeling now.

I felt riding my bike again. I went in Thursday late afternoon and raced in on my bike like I always liked to do. And I can just feel You...

Wanting more, that's right, you can feel when you are holding things back. You need to get more conscious of that too. So whenever you get nervous about someone's reaction to what you wrote. You fill it with love since you know that connection is real and worthy in truth. Each feeling you get is real and valid, becoming conscious of them and their place and purpose will help you a lot with what you do.

I know; I'm trying. So the nervousness means I need to send love to something. And when I write and feel you want more I need to Just Do IT, instead of worrying about it, wondering, questioning, whatever. lol...

When I ride down into the sunshine passing the cars I get so charged with the energy of God. Pumped up strong and clear. Which is what happens to me all the time in school. Riding around, meeting people, setting things up. . . . .

Oh, like Dr K said, social engineering. I like watching everyone work together and succeed at stuff. Inspiring people to grow. Running around like a crazy person. lol. . . . Last week Cecil had her first meeting for her R21 grant from NIH. I made her 13 agenda books and got Michel there too. Cecil introduced us as her three RA's Melissa, Michelle and me.... lol...

Michelle works at the BSN office too, and would be losing her job at the end of the term so I told her about Cecile's job. I brought her over once too. Turns out she's related to Koehler in BSN too, lol... So we gotta keep her in the family... lol... Milissa is someone Cecil found. Has a BA in education and doing the MS to Phd in Nursing Education now. She's pretty sharp and smart too, so it'll be a good team.

What are you doing again, we asked about the bike ride and you round around all over but there.

I know, I seem to do that a lot, go round in circles and never really say what I need to say. I felt the love and joy of God riding into his sun, shining bright from my heart. Knowing everyone could feel that Joy with me.... I wanted to get my foot brake on this bike too, so I could show everyone the best way to ride a bike. Course whenever I race down, leaning over my bike while holding onto the seat behind me with both hands... I get such a charge. It feels so much the same, like I've done it a million times...

Almost like the ride into High School, meddle School, Cresent School was always the same flight for me.... 3.09pm I felt that charge again to read the message to Scott and Chuck. I love you guys, Praise God all things come... lol.... So like I can feel Kristin or Cyndi holding onto me as I race on my bike. lol... New bike riding method all set and ready. Yes I always feel how racers will adopt it someday so they can go faster.... Is this what you asked?

Why can't you stay with just the question, or focus at hand instead of going in all these different directions.

I try. Do you need me to write about anything? Or what do you think about all of this?

What a good way to start. You've done all that you wanted to do. So you can let it go, and not concern yourself with it at all. People will learn and find what they are ready for, or they will not. Either way is just what it needs to be. And you are ready for either but what else did you feel you needed to do.

I know I have to read and write a few papers to be published. As well as see a bunch of professors at USF again. I could just feel how easy it will be to finish everything I started in one week. Like everyone will be waiting for me to come in and finish what we started.

What does this mean to you?

I guess I always dream about being able to love and heal all the time. Where my work is just chanting, teaching, sharing, loving and helping others to learn and share in the truth and love that I feel for them.

Why do you have to rely on others for this?

I do Love you and share in what I feel in each moment with you.

What you share with us, and listen to is a lot more than just spending time with us. It's about loving and being honest with yourself, and the Joy and Passion you feel deep inside

I know, and I'm sharing more and more all the time

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Amen 353pm

Ahhh, does this feel good!

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!
So I need to forgive and forget. Say what I feel and drop out of sight !!!

Why not, you are free again. How much more will you lose before you will just let it flow?

I'm confused again.
Thursday's group was weird. I felt like I needed to stop going since I couldn't keep up with all that was here for me now.... Adding more just felt stupid. But when I got there the door was closed, so I just stepped to the next open door. Skalkos of course, as I always want to see her anyway. As I walked into her office, I realized and said to her how I really had no one else I could say anything to... She told me that was exactly why I needed to go in there. I was charged and excited, going crazy with too much to do. Course I told her how all the crazy stuff we talked about was happening now....... She brought me over telling me to save it to share with everyone in there. So I gave her a hug and told her how I loved her. . . . then walked in blowing up immediately. . . lol. . . sorry Jean!

It's always happening now! Now is all there is!

so What's the problem then?

I need to ask You that. Why is there always so much?

Son, you always could do anything. What's important?

I know... I need to do so much still. Or I really just need to do something for You. Everything must be for You!!! And I feel like I get lost in other people's greed and desire. . . Wanting to help them and lose track of my own commitment to You!

Wow is that really it finally. I always feel what I need to do. But I don't always follow it through. I get insecure seeking support and reach for others, where I get lost in their drama and forget my own. Wow, that has really happened all of my life! My dreams inspire others but then I want to follow their lead instead of build from my own. So it all dies then. Nothing gets done unless we all find our own passion. I NEED TO WEAVE OUR DREAMS TOGETHER!

Now, I feel all the stuff at school coming together. We had a team meeting today about the recycling business with Dr. Henley and Dr. Givens. . . . And again I just watched as all the pieces went all over the place. . . LOL. . . . Sounds like how Hanna-West's class has gone now too. We were supposed to present something there Tuesday too. No one knew except Jack, who wasn't there. Another opportunity for me to breakinto the New World!

What do you feel?

I feel like I can do whatever I want to do. . . Like the deal with Scott and chuck blew up. I guess after their fight at the bar-b-que they both blamed me for the disagreements. I really just watched it happen too. Like I barely participated at all, and let everyone else say their piece. Then when they did ask me, I really only complained about the context, telling them to look at what they did and wrote. . . It really just all smelled bad to me. I put everyone together and I had the skills and resources to make it all happen. But then they wanted the control and 30-50% of the profits, wanting me to concede and kiss ass . . . So I dropped out no reasonable deal, then forget it.

Hum, guess it's kinda obvious why that BS never happened. I wonder now if that's really what chuck has always done to me. Wanting control and the last word over my projects and dreams, leaves me to think that I don't need to do anymore on it. LOL. . . Yea, smarty pants, you're incharge now, so you do it. . . lol.. >;-D))))

Oh that is just so funny! Now with no one around to tell me what I can't do, I can really do anything I want.

WOW, I did it finally. I finally figured out what I'm doing and what it's all about. I'm just LOVING JESUS! Jesus, You are placing these people and opportunities in front of me all the time where I can listen and love anyone who comes along. Each person I meet I simply open up to their dreams and feel where they are at so I can develop something with them. I love and share with everyone who comes along.

I remember in Henley's class I told him how "everything is an opportunity." Course he didn't believe me. But now, I feel how whenever you love someone, you can feel and see their skills and opportunities. You can find out how people work and share together and help them to be successful. So not just that every "thing" is an opportunity, but every ONE!

What do you think now...

I wont worry about the past, the future is my life one way. . . .LIVING FOR TODAY!!! It's so funny how I feel so much here with this. Hearing such words on my radio... CMradio.net I keep seeing myself having this big bar-b-que with the team from Henley's class at my house. Just to show them everything. . . . Oh you guys want a long term recycling program, boy do I have a deal for you.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. But why do I stop now?

What now...

YOU need to tell me!

We are ready Son. You can do everything that you are seeing before you now. Each little piece will fit together exactly as you have imagined. You are making this happen. And when you feel clear and strong about it, things will happen quicker. You know and understand all of this very easily. And making it happen is more important than anything right now. There is nothing more for you to focus on. You don't need to think, or plan, you simply need to do it. There is no reason to write yourself instructions, just do it. You have most of it all done already. You have the people and the passion. There is not so much to worry about. Everyone will come to help you as you begin to get results.

I'm nervious

What now. . . you can do anything. When you went to get that motorcycle, you were not sure what to do until you put the key in and pushed it down the sidewalk. Sure you are nervious, that keeps your power focused. You don't need anymore guidence. No more planning. You've designed everything, and built more than you can explain. Just tell the people what they need to do.

I can't do that

Why not? It's something that you will need to do. . . No one out there as any clue anyway. It's about creation son, Evolution, Change. You feel the truth and power behind all the emotions and desires. Remember Dream Weaver, you are here to make it all work. Friends, schools, businesses, families, everything woven together into a Dream of Love and Divinity and Truth for all. Not anyone's perception of this, or any personal desire, but YOURS! You alone asked for This Vision. It is yours. You can share it and make it happen all by yourself. No one can stop you. It's about being strong and clear and sincere. You asked all of them about their passions and desires. You know all that stuff already. Been there, done that. So making it strong and clear for them to benefit is very easy for you. The truth and sincerity is so powerful, they can taste it. It hits them, like a fist. Everyone can feel that from you. You just blow them over. Not anything easy or weak. Something very strong and clear.

I know, you say this all the time. Well, maybe I feel this all the time. I know how people work. Desires and emotions are really easy. So to put things together where they are all simple and easy to do is so wonderful. I get nervious when I think about it all. There is still so much that i don't understand.

What do you expect? This now is something that everyone can get involved with and make happen. It's not something so weird or abstract. People are smart. You bring people together to get something done. Then you simply do it. Nothing too complicated, most everything can be simple with the right people involved. And you have people ready to work and make it all happen. You simply need to let them all know what your dreams are all about.

I'm always nervious about that. I think about Thursday where they always want to know what i feel. I always avoid that question and think about what's touching me, or what I feel around me. Never what I feel inside or what they make me feel. It's funny they all want to help others in the group. They know they are growing and learning as they share. But I still avoid really feeling. . . or sharing what I feel. . . it's really funny. I've learned and seen how important it is to share what i feel with those others around me. But then I avoid it so much.

All things come in time now... Don't worry yourself about the details. Trust your heart and make things happen as you see them. Son giving your Life to God does have significant advantages. You are free to simply BE. Follow all your passions and let things grow and evolve as you FEEL. All the power of PEOPLE is in their feelings. Like when you ride your bike, and feel all those people. It's not something they can individually understand. They can go along and pretend to be in control and secure, but nothing will happen if you don't desire it enough. The vision and passion that you carry on this moment is more important than anything that they will understand. It's not just you anymore. You are moving with the Desire Of GOD. It's Existance, Life, Being, that moves not simply singular desires. There is a lot more focus and details to all of this than you might understand.

I know . . . . Please lead me to only do what is the Passion and Love of GOD, for the Glory of Father, Son and Holy Ghost. . . . amen. 2.40am

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!
so i need to forgive and forget. say what i feel and drop out of sight

Why not you are free again. how much more will lose before you will just let it flow?

I'm confused again.
thursday's group was weird. i felt like i needed to stop going since i couldn't keep up with all that was there for me now.... adding more just felt stupid. but when i got there the door was closed, so i just stepped to the next open door, which was skalkos of course, as i always would want to see her anyway. as i walked into her office, i realized and said to her how i really had no one else i could say anything to... she told me that was exactly why i needed to go in there. i was charged and excited, going crazy with too much to do. course i told her how all the crazy stuff we talked about was happening now.......

it's always happening now! now is all there is!

so What's the problem then?

I need to ask you that. why is there always so much?

son, you always could do anything. What's important?

I know... i need to do so much still... or i really just need to do something for you. everything must be for you. and i feel like i get lost in other people's greed and desire. . . wanting to help them and lose track of my own.

Wow is that really it finally. i always feel what i need to do. but i don't always follow it through. i get insecure seeking support and reach for others, where i get lost in their drama and forget my own. wow that has really happened all of my life. my dreams inspire others but then i want to follow their lead instead of build my own. so it all dies then. nothing gets done unless we all find our own passion.

now, i feel all the stuff at school coming together. we had a meeting today about the recycling business. . . . and again i just watched as the pieces all went all over. lol... souns like how hanna-west's class has gone too.

What do you feel?

I feel like i can do what i want. . . like the deal with scott and chuck blew up. I guess after their fight at the bar-b-que they both blamed me for the disagreements. I really just watched it happen too. Like I barely participated at all, and let everyone else say their piece. Then when they did ask me, i really only complained about the context... it really just all smelled bad. I put everyone together and I had the skills and resources to make it all happen. But they wanted the control and 30-50% of the profits. . .

Hum, guess it's kinda obvious why that
no one around to tell what i can't do, so i can really do something.

What

I

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Are you Ready!?!?!? lol... ;=)

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

"It's about time, it's about time, don't need a reason, do what you believe in.. Get a little crazy, give it up, get it on time." Best Mix CMRadio 8.56pm Hide by The Echoing Green

I still believe 9.01pm I offer my life, you are my shelter, you are my king, you are the risen son of god.... Thank you Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. For helping me to express the truth that you've opened up for me. Please continue to lead and guide me to understand and express The Love of Jesus Christ in everything that I am for the Glory of God the Father, Son and Holy Ghost

What happened?

I guess chuck finally had a bar-b-que! Wow, perfect, classic, better than the original, since it was so totally original that Chuck's dad even stopped by to get a copy and shook hands with us all! Wow, perfect wife, daughters, house, family dog, even awesome mint chocolate chip in a sugar ice cream cone at the end. Even with a little extra on top for me! WOW, SO Perfect!

I was at home with my brother and dad better, closer, more real than ever I have seen anyone alive ever. The American Dream! My mom was awesome too, but she was alone with all she could do. I guess some people don't even have a mom, so I shouldn't talk since I had two moms.... lol... Got a hug from Joyce today too... lol... Little digital Disney guy from the Lion King. ... . . As Bear licks my arm here while I try to type.

So everything was really cool, and I see why I always want to get my friends together. All of them are so far beyond the scope of mortal men. It's so funny when I think about how many times I've seen and met these people. Over again and again we affect each others' lives...lol...FALLOW THE NUMBERS.. lol... link dated: Sun Mar 5, 2006 4:37 pm copied at 9.30pm here tonight... lol...

What happened next!

I guess the guys had a fight.. Again... Always happened in my house I guess... Funny now, how I can feel how Christopher carries that energy too now. It's really kinda sad. I feel more children coming still. All learning more and healing more. lol... Just like all these other people I bump into. Like we've all met before and bumped heads more than a few times. Some souls here over and over again. Always learning, always growing.

What happened next?

WOW. I had ridden in the car with one of them, so had to go through this craziness all the way home. He said she said... bla bla bla... I just wanted to hide. When I got home all I could do was write goodnight. Never heard so much BS in my life, on and on like nothing I could fallow or recite now. Course as I wrote, and rewrote and rewrote, I got a dozen other emails and such... So I just attached them all together and said goodnight: "please let yourself out" and I went out to chant. . . . Locked myself in again.

what

Shit sandwich, start sweet, smash.... Then end sweet... God tapping you on the shoulder...

Yes, look here son, it's about time you really made some money... That's right. You know it! Are you going to write about it or not?

I know it's just awesome that Scott and chuck are finally working together. . .

What else?

I know I need to get a lotto ticket and go chant now... Thank you so very much Loving Lord Jesus Christ for filling me with your Strength, Love and Wisdom for the Glory of Father, Son and Holy Ghost. Amen

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

here we go....

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What you need to do... you already know...

I Love you god!... Amen...
Thank you so very much for this time and moment to make things work right for us.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/starsusaorg/message/1021
Please for your glory allow things to work with scott and chuck. I can't deal with it now. All for YOUR Glory Dear GOD! I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. amen

Unity Methods PATENT

7. Detailed Description of Preferred Embodiment
Fundamentally consciousness represents an energy stream. The Method creates the environment for the consciousness to expand increasing this energy stream. By loving new connections and ideas for dealing with any psychological and physiological state of an individual person’s life we are allowing ourselves to consider this fundamental perception of Unity in God. Detailed below are three different psychological or physiological "problems" solved by this Method disclosed.
--=====------------===========--------------==========-
HERE WE GO AGAIN
http://stars.dyndns.info/homestead/files/DEGREE.htm

PHD = > Leading Anthro to connect Sustainable Health to Earth!

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word! 7.58pm

What?

It's just been really crazy everywhere. I'm still not sure about what I am doing so much of the time but whenever anyone asks me to do anything I just jump all over it. So I guess John and Cecile are really happy, because they are about the only people who ask for anything of me. So I jump all over it. It's almost like I don't need to do anything else, not even for my classes.

Like tonight I just read the chapter for my entrepreneur class tomorrow. It was about being honest with yourself and realistic about your own skills. Wow, that's almost funny, since that is really all that I am about. I just jump on things and blow them away. Like this morning I called Scott in the Parks Department. And I left a message just saying hey it's been over a year and this mulch is still here. DEP has regulations about storing fill and EPA has fines for fill on a landfill. So next week I'll tell my attorney to write them.

He called back in no time and basically said the same thing he's said all along. And I really don't care, I might get a letter sent anyway. Then I realized I also need to get my Bike Rack sold and get some more patents done, as well as my roof under construction. . . . . Which are all attorney letters.

More and more to do. Then I'm finding more every moment as well. It's almost funny how much I try to do and all. Really weird in fact.

What did you miss. You read about things you've been thinking of.

I know, it's that I really just decided that I wanted to make my living doing things that I love to do. I mean, I know I'm not going anywhere and the whole world will be saved, almost by accident . . . I can do anything, still . . . So I need to get into the place where I have the most fun and joy in my life . . . Which means chanting full time for me. And I instantly feel the children. Like everyone having children here, and I just teach and play 24/7 . . . Like perfect joy and freedom flashed through me.

WOW, I just saw like my kids and me doing that same stuff all over again. It was like this flash into wonderland and they could feel it too. Course now they see through the program they've gotten into. I guess it's something we each have to go through on our own. Soon we figured that we could do anything at all and did it in truth with Your Love!

What is next is all up to you. You feel and see the Tantric Dreams that they all feel. The Mayan Rituals were where you all started. Everyone can feel that. It is exactly as you see. Countless energies and Beings coming together fearlessly through your Spirit. You have really come a long way and will certainly be surprised again as this comes together.

I know I love you Lord Jesus Christ. Thank You for Your Love, Body and Blood for the Glory of Father, Son and Holy Ghost. . . Amen.

We are very happy with the things you are doing, as they each fill a place to make everyone free in this Spirit!

I told Sharon about the Garden Spot food company this morning and how I want to set up in the BSN Courtyard. But I never said how I could perform there too which would create a completely different flair to it all. Everytime I think about it the details get more and more specific. The GardenSpot CUP . . . Another patent of something so very simple and useful . . . Then she went off asking me about patents. . .

What happened?

It was weird I just went over and checked the email at my office and I did one backwards. And John responded for me taking the blame and defending his troops. It's really honorable and considerate. And then I read the next message and the numbers in the time are opposite this first one. And my actions were opposite in each as well. . . Or reactions? . . . Where John covered up my fuck up in the top one, while another author said how super it all went for them.

What do you expect.

I really try not to expect anything. But "super" all the time would be nice. I know and feel so very much all the time too. It's such a trip to feel all the power and focus created in any situation. lol. . . like I realized how the BSN Plan class all went about perfect. The one guy who had been leading and pushing it all along came to realize that STARS was the perfect vehicle to pull it off. I never tried to push one way or anything. And so cool, and I tell him Scott's on the Board too. Course Scott taught the first 30 minutes of the last class anyway. . . So he's flipped over it.

Now I realized what that could really mean. Then immediately I flew into visions of USF business deals and student groups and everything all over again. Complete systems and scenarios all working together perfectly, like planned from the beginning of time. Each fitting together like the never ending magic of nature where the earth and environment bounce back and forth between levels of existence. Suddenly I was in complete Joy and Peace where everything worked together perfectly.

What did you see now . . .

I guess it falls into another 1776, declaration of independence where all taxes and governments are gone. People Loving the sharing, working together for themselves and just leaving each other in joy. . . . lol . . . Wow that picture flashes into the same places all the time. Like it's all done already, and I'm just coming along to watch it grow. . . . .

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

7:18:35 PM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

I awoke in a dream kissing. It was nice and wonderful. So I chanted and did another affirmation. Then I edited and re-edited this email to Lyn and sent it. She knew I sent it and wasn't sure what to expect but was filled with desire and anticipation. It feels like it will be a surprise for her. But I've been talking with her all day. She's really with me again and I'm glad. Though I can't wait until she makes something happen between us.

I know there are a hundred thousand other things I need to do. And I really have been pushing all kinds of things in all different directions. It's funny; she's come through so much, and I've told her she's going to be working for me next time. I already showed her I can easily meet all her fantasies . . . happily and very easily! So now she's going to have to get busy meeting mine… lol… life is good!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

wow finding more and more

: "Like the Madrid Codex, the Dresden and Paris codices also contain a number of almanacs structured according to the 260-day tzolk'in calendar. Almanacs represent only one component of the Dresden Codex, however, which is unique in terms of the Maya codices in having astronomical tables that include Long Count dates. (The Long Count system of dating is commonly used on Classic period monuments to anchor historical events that are centered around the lives of the ruling family in time.) These tables were designed to track solar and lunar eclipses; the appearance and disappearance of Venus in the night sky; and the positioning of Mars against the constellations. Astronomical instruments occur in both the Paris and Grolier codices as well. A series of thirteen constellations representing the Maya "zodiac" appears on pages 23-24 of the Paris Codex (illustrated below), and the Grolier Codex contains an incomplete almanac that has many similarities to the Dresden Venus table."

8:05:26 AM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

Tuesday, February 20, 2006

Dear Lyn,

I am glad to see a happy text-message from you, and I hope Ciera is equally joyful. It's been awhile since we spoke. I miss you both!

I understand how important it is for you to work things out with your Ex on your own. Afterall, you two brought this beautiful soul into this world. You owe it to her to make things right.

It's been difficult not seeing you, especially after bonding with "our" daughter. However, God brought us together for some reason; so please do as you need to first . . the etheric visits are still nice; but the phone is clearer!

As you expected, I wrote you after your phone call on the 23rd. I had not felt comfortable to send it to you until I put more together.

When it rains it really pours, the walk on the tight rope will be easier if shared at least as just Friends. I'm here for you if you need just a friend to talk to, or anything more!!! But only when you are ready!

My Love and Light go out to you both!
Namaste'

Eric

Hi Lyn,

Hope you're doing well. It's been awhile since we spoke. I miss you and Ciera.

It's been difficult for me not seeing you, especially since I was beginning to feel the bond with "our" daughter. However, the Good Lord brought us together and for some reason He has taken us apart.

I understand what you're going through and how important it is to you to explore the possibility of making things work again with your Ex. Afterall, you two brought a beautiful soul into this world together. You owe it to her to try everything to make things work. I wish you only the best.

I hope we will always be at least Friends - and friends talk to each other on a regular basis, although this is an awkward time. Obviously I want to be more than just friends - but I want at least that... the friendship. If the Good Lord decided we should be more than that, then I want you to feel that the past is passed and you gave it your best effort. I don't want just a part of you. I want ALL of you.... but only when you're ready.

I'm here for you if you need someone to talk to.

I Will Forever Be,

Eric

10:19:59 AM

Yes I chanted last night and again she came through. Not as strong and erotic as I've seen before, but more just to tease me it seemed. After the chat with Lisa I kinda feel more worried about Ciera. Like Lyn is not there for the little girl very much, and seems to just appease her to avoid conflict and allow her to grow up as she wants.

Kathy,

Really tired Sunday too...

No one to chant this morning... ;-( DJ even seemed over done . . .

Lisa soon came in and invited me to her house thingy again. I asked if she needed anything and she gave me directions and asked me to get something she needed for dinner.

I arrived on time, before anyone else of course . . lol . . and helped her prepare some stuff. She now lives blocks from my parents house . . . I soon asked her about Lyn. She said she invited Lyn, but never got a reply so didn't expect her.

She's only known Lyn for just over 6 months. Really likes her and enjoys her sensitivity and strong spiritual senses. But seemed to say I had spent more time with her and also said she was a bit "flighty and non-committal" . . . She never met john or any family except Ciera and was a little stunned that she leaves Ciera at her Grandmothers to travel off for weeks at a time. Almost seemed non-committal to her own daughter too?

It was interesting to hear another perspective but not much more. Lisa invited a bunch of people from Harmony as most everyone recognizes me as the video guy. Petito, Lou and Doug were there, so I ended up staying longer chatting with Lu, since I really planned to only make an appearance.

They all have been in classes together and seem to attend things together regularly . . . . I was welcomed by all so it was kinda cool . . .

I got home at about 4.30pm and went to sleep reading a school book. Of course I have class tomorrow and left the book for it at USF. So I need to get there at dawn to read and take a quiz before my 9am class.

Yea I was a little sad about Lyn, but have before felt that the courts would not be done for another month at least anyway. She slammed the door shut in our last phone call (1/23), but the box of sandals and text-message-thanks imply the door is cracked open again (2/16). I'm not sure if my note will open the door, or close it, but it should at least give her better insights on her daughter, which she evidently really needs!

I feel like I now have some free time to get a lot of things done, so I'm going to focus on this... Keith has offered to edit my article for school, but I'm not sure he will yet... Have you seen this? http://www.seedwiki.com/wiki/stars2man/fit_into_the_science.cfm

Nite Nite
Eric

She knows I'm writing her again. She's known this for a while and keeps wondering about it. She's not ready to just open my blog, because she knows she gets lost into it too easily. She's really just waiting for a note directed just to her. She knows there is something coming, and that might be why she was so nice and polite with the flower-text-message. Course I know we'll be together again soon, I'm just not clear if it will be because I push for it or not.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

4 Ahaw Dates and Maya Creation Mythology: A View from Postclassic and Colonial Yucatec Maya Literature

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word! 5.15pm

What now?

I know you want me to get busy on countless other things that you have before me. What's new

Well if you are here, you might as well get it done quickly, don't you think?

Yes I know. So I finally got my new server running. I HIRED someone to come here and fix it on Thursday and he only crashed it! I asked him hundred questions and such while he sat waiting on the server. So I found out I had really done it right from the start and was really just a WIMP not getting it done.

Wow, so you are a wimp now, what else happened Thursday?

When I got to school I realized the group was about to start so I called them and left a message. Then I put on my jacket and slacks for the Career fair for MBA's. Course I was really only interested in going to www.nshmba.org for dinner. I went to one event they had last year and never heard from them again. So I was thrilled to get an invite to volunteer to help with the meeting. Another lady at the International Business Center was going too so I suggested we carpool from the Career fair.

The fair started at 4:30 while the nshmba started at 6-pm in Ybor City. I told her we should leave by 5pm to get there early with the traffic. But then there was this Mayan Researcher coming at 4pm in the SOC building. I left for there at 3:30! Walked around reading signs and seeing such until it started at 4pm prompt. Another class started in the room by 5pm so they had to be done at a quarter till. So I decided to leave at 4:30 PROMPT!

I sat in the corner by the door. The last one in was a totally gorgeous redhead. Long and wavy hair to mid-back. . . Sitting with a seat between us infront of me. Then the discussion was INTENSE! She started off showing these Maya Hieroglyphic Codices and said how she was going to explain the creation story as it was written in like 4 different codicies. The Codex was like a old Mayan almanac of events and dates, astrology and such.

She described how she would explain how they recorded the times that rituals were done for the sun and earth. WOW. I was like wired in her words. As she showed the powerpoints talking about it all I could feel the vibrations going right threw me! WOW! She knew her stuff. Like when I saw the DNA coding and how they created a picture to me as I scrolled through them. lol... It's like several strands moving now as I look again

I really hung on her every word holding my palms up, touching thumd and index finger. . . . Until 4:30 and I got up and left. I got her name and email off her powerpoint. Road my bike back, up to my office to get the tan Jacket for the Fair.

I walked over to the new building where they had it. I looked over at everyone and saw all these black suits! As I walked bown the stairs past a violin player I noticed one other tan jacket, it was koehler's partner Tony. So I shock his hand and told him about the black jackets. Then I asked him about the patent and getting it all done for him. He said he was still thinking about it. I told him to worked, just needed to get finalized so he could make a pretty one.

I chatted with a few other people. Got a job lead for Keith, lol. . . . And then met the ladies heading to NSHMBA. Soon I raced off to bike over to my truth and picked up Audet who was going with me. We got there just about perfect, and signed people in collecting money. Someone in my team from the Business Plan class came in with his wife. Then there were a few really sweet pretty girls there too. I never really talked to anyone except a few. One guy recognized me from the fair. thn a UT professor came in too.

Why didn't you go out and chat with people? You had some practice at the fair and did fine.

I guess I couldn't over do it. Starting kinda slow.

What happened with Audet.

Well on the way home we were talking about stuff. And she finally said she was a civil engineer too. Wow. Then I found out she was in te Peace Corps too,and went to Parague to work on the water system and some politician ran off with the money for it. So she wanted to get a MBA to get more involved in planning and operating these organizations. Then I told her about STARS and how I tried to change things too, and realized I could only do it myself instead of relying on others. Everyone has a price. Sooner or later everyone in government gets enough money that they don't care anymore.

It was funny. We were talking about how people go crazy when the money gets to a certain level. They just loose all senses, becoming like a robot hungry for just money. Then we got to STARS and she was blown away. Sorta like I was hearing she was an engineer. So I told her I needed her help to design a water system. Then I also told her we should study for the PE exam and do that too.

What happened next....

I guess we just sat in my truck. I saw Chris Thomas come out. I never saw him before john brought him over. I realized he looked a lot like my dad . . . Seemingly with his head in the sand exactly like my dad too.

What's with your dad?

I guess I sent him a note that Thomas said "hi". . . . He replied "love, dad" BS at the end. Like he has any clue what either of those words mean. So I wished him a Happy Anniversary. That went out the night before it on Valentines day; Sharon has told me before that I'm the only one in the family who remembers them . . . lol . . .

What's the point?

I'm really not sure. I wrote the Mayan teacher to apologize for leaving early and asked about meeting again. She said she would be happy too but was leaving for a few weeks and asked if I could email her something. NOPE, need to meet. Then I realized she was a Honors teacher in New College and I could do my research with her. She's In USF too. WOW, I felt how she would want to study everything. . . wow, I mean everything comes out at once, reminds me:

This invention came in a vision after a death experience. I dropped a Suzuki 650 at 110mph two weeks after my 16th birthday, no boots, no gloves & no helmet; not a pretty sight; several months later a "patent lab book" was started, which now includes thousands of pages.

I guess my whole life has been this research project for you hasn't it

Well it's about time, I thought you were going to be quick about this it's nearly two hours later and your finally done.

I know, I'm sory, time for school work now.

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.
Thank you for sharing You life with me . . Withth all of US. Please lead and guide me to fulfill your Dreams for the Glory of God the Father Son and Holy Ghosts. Amen

1:19:10 PM

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

Saturday, February 17, 2007

On the 12th I went to Sam's and got some gas and such. Then I stopped at Kabloom across the street about sending flowers to Lyn and Ciera. I spoke to Carman again and she was thrilled about getting something for the daughter and mom. She knew about the Christmas flowers and I got some balloons and such then. They had a few Gund Bears and little green frog, but nothing but glass containers and some other stuff I didn't like. She told me I could put together whatever I wanted and they could deliver it for me.

So I stopped at a few places looking for a basket or something cool to put flowers together for Ciera. I found a little fish picture frame and thought the frog could hold it in a basket. The roses and all was cool for Lyn but getting something for Ciera was more complicated as just flowers are boring and candies and such aint any good either. Tuesday the 13th I got up early and went to get some more pictures made and all. I was buzzing in total bliss feeling their surprises. I got out my calligraphy pens and wrote up some cards for each of them.

Lyn's card was "For a special Lady" opens up to say ". . .who's as beautiful on the inside . . . as she is on the outside . . . Happy Valentines Day" Then I wrote:

"If you Love Someone, Set them Free.

If it returns to you, it is yours

If it doesn't, it never was"

Then at the bottom:

"By the Word of Jesus Christ, amen" EW

On Ciera's I wrote:

"Will you be my Valentine?"

"My love is with you" EW

I didn't sign either, but put my little "EW" in the corner. On the drive back to Kabloom Tuesday, I stopped at a few more places to find a little picture frame and anything else for Ciera that would be nice. I made a bunch of pictures and got a few that worked with the frame. I edited a few pictures from the 1/7 bike day and it turned out cool. Then I found a picture keychain for Lyn too. Carmen loved it all of course and put together all sorts to make sure they got a special V-day.

I was just blissed out all day vibrating at the love I felt for them both. It almost felt like Lyn knew what I was doing, and was smiling already in anticipation. But I just let it go, and moved on. Wednesday the 14th I was buzzing again, but could feel that Lyn was busy and tried not to connect at all. She knew something was coming, but never wanted to connect or get excited either.

I dropped by to visit Kathy and Ginnie on Thursday and she was stunned I hadn't even gotten a thank you note from Lyn. She felt like I was sad about it too. I was really just tired and hungry after the long day, and really only held the bliss from the day making things for Ciera. When I got home there was a box there from Lyn, with my sandals and sunglasses . . . with a return address for a post office in Lake Alfred? Pretty writing!

It was kind of weird, no note, nothing but the box and stuff wrapped in bubble wrap. It was obvious she took her time and care with it, but nothing more. Course I called Kathy the moment I found the box. She was upset about me not even getting a "Thank You," and I wanted her to know about the box. She didn't answer and without a note or anything I didn't know what to think. So I chanted and sent all the energy up into Heaven. It was like Lyn was waiting or wanting some reply from me, but I just sent the energy up.

Then the next day; Friday Morning I got a test message on my phone:

Thank you for the Beautiful bouquet of flowers for Ciera and me! I appreciate your thoughtfulness! Have a Miraculous day! 10.21am 2/16/07

Course I replied that second too, as I called Kathy to tell her. I didn't like her mad at Jaclyn for the no "Thank You."

Glad you enjoyed them, hope Ciera had a big smile! Thanks 4 the sandals. Nameste' er:-) 10.40am 2/16/07

Then I could feel Lyn connected to me again. Her joy and bliss were with me all day. I tried not to talk with her. But we chatted a few times anyway. I kept telling her she needed to make this real and forget the dream and the ethers routine. She never said what she would do, but it felt like she had something planned. I went to have a big dinner with Kathy and Ginnie again. I was feeling like my phone would ring with an invite to dinner from Lyn. But I wouldn't hold onto that feeling or make anything more of it.

I was certainly buzzing all day. I could feel her close again. Not completely attached like we were with the silver chord, but just the easy joy knowing we were still thinking of each other.

I guess that's my whole point today. I felt her so strong and clear yesterday and last night. Talking and sharing again through the ethers like we had before. The Chant last night was really strong and I went right to sleep. I felt her still, but it was still like she was up to something. Sometimes I wonder if she is with john trying to make it work or if there is anything there at all. For the most part it feels like that's about done, finished, kaput!

The first day I met her, she was with Lisa at church. After I Chanted with Lori, she had told Lisa about it and Lisa wanted to learn it too. After missing week after week, Lisa finally did with Sally and I. So last week, Lisa said she still wanted to do it again, but was busy with stuff. She told me she bought a new house in Northdale and invited me to a house warming that is tomorrow.

I mentioned this in passing to Kathy. And she's convinced that Lyn and Lisa have planned something. As I feel it; it's almost like an engagement party; which seems more like hopeful thinking than a heart-felt truth. Then again I could feel Ciera and Lyn as I got things ready on the 13th. Then felt more confusion than anything on the 14th. It was almost like she expected an email or something and didn't get anything so was disappointed. Like sent the sandals next day priority mail on the 14th from wherever she was. But then made it to her office Friday the 16th and text-messaged me the moment she got all the flowers

It's still kinda weird for me now. I went over the note I prepared for her. After she said good-bye she told me to email her. I've not done that yet. But I've posted most everything online in the Blog and then edited and reedited a summary page to send to her. I planned to send it on the 14th if I didn't get a reply, but Kathy said how the "Set Love Free" that I wrote was more than enough already.

So the links page is all ready for Lyn, and I'll wait and see what happens. I keep telling her to call me, visit me, or just grab me . . . and she knows how I'm always looking for her in church. It's really a matter of whenever she decided she was ready for a real relationship. I can tell that we're destined for each other, and I know she's getting ready to take it seriously. I just don’t know how soon or what else she might have planned in relation to this.

Funny, I told her through the ethers yesterday that she needs to come work for me now. Drop everything else and be fulltime on what we need to share and do. Course then I think about the sex, and how we'll be totally erotic and kinky with each other. It's like we'll need a few months to just get horny together and get all this hunger out. Every time I think about this I laugh. She seems to think that she will surprise me with how horny and kinky she is, while I know that I can do things that no one has ever seen or experienced. It's almost funny, how the desire and anticipation gets stronger and stronger.

Thank you Loving Lord Jesus Christ for you Peace, Love and Joy! Amen!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

I'm wired again, and it feels really good. Today Cecile got her new office. So I moved her in as if it were my own office. Making it all just right! Or like I would do for my own mom. It was really kinda neat, since I've moved offices so many times. I couldn't even count them all. . . lol... It was really easy and fun! So then she offered me more hours and asked about me doing more for her. Last week when she saw my abstract for Klasko she kinda freaked, but I guess I never really warned her about it. But now she wants me to do more for her so I immediately told her about me taking classes with them too. I know I really need to sit down and go over this thing with her in detail. Feels liek 3 MS's now, somehow the sustainabilty and spiritual leadership needs more PEOPLE science and care from a nurse! Course I immediately feel like I'm going over it all with Sharon too. The two ladies are so much alike, almost sisters. . . lol. . . Never thought of that before!

What happened in business.

I finally got my shit together for the dual major there... MSM & MBA! I got Balfour to file the stuff for me to get into the 2nd program and then asked around about the USF business cards. No one knew who was paying for it or authorizing it, so I asked around to everyone and finally just did it myself with the form I had received when I started. It was really fun. I even called Cathy and showed John, Sharon and Balfour samples before I finally ordered some. Now of course I want to change it. . . LOL. . . .

What else?

It is all just so funny, because this whole day has just been more, more, more every moment. Like after 6pm I was checking on books that john needed and went to the library to get some. As I was coming home the BIG FULL MOON showing off in my face. WOW, I knew why I was so hyped up. Everything was about to blow. I could see it there right before my eyes.

I knew I had to chant tonight and started by 9pm when I got home. Even while working with Cecile she told me how she couldn't sleep. So I told her how her malatonin turned on at 3am and she had to get up and use it. She knew exactly what I was talking about and it was really funny. Earlier the Dean was in her office chatting and said how she did morning exercises and such to start the day. Sounded like yoga, MBSR stuff and she said how all the nurses there dream about taking Cecile's class. Wow, wait until they see my class . . . lol. . .

I even told Sharon how when I chant I connect heaven and earth and get totally pumped up in energy so what ever I think about goes into some fantastic visions. So now I thought how I could buy the treehouse and all the land there with some fantastic business plan to Bob detailing all the pieces of the chant, video, online save the world stuff. WOW!

What else?

I know I've also been seeing the deals with Scott all happening at the same time. Like three four, five contracts in a row. Chuck scrambling to keep up. And then I'm getting social again. There's three or four meetings I'm scheduled to go to THIS WEEK, just to meet and socialize. Wow, it's about time I did that again. It's just so funny. Then I listed a few other people to call and setup, Gail, Google, Ho, Dave, Shawn, Equan, Bates, Shields, Sharon again and again with Cecile. . . . lol. . . . . and I told Sharon about shape-shifting and talking to animals; while I can feel information FROM EVERYTHING. . . lol. . . while she's just struggling with the male ego crap there in the office. All the guys jsut worried about their johnson, and she's driving this new Hot Rod. Bigger johnson than any of them. And I see Skalkos as I ride to nursing and she's driving a BIG Johnson too . . . . no wonder she's lost in all the rules and BS instead of seeing the truth I'm sticking in her face.

Course the group is getting video taped now too! Funny, my whole life is an experiment, and I can prove it!

Why don't you get more specific?

I need to get some sleep. It's 1:33am already. Course what time would I ever expect.

What times have you been waking to chant this week?

I've not missed a day in over a week now chanting, and it's 2:22 I've seen lately. Then I feel 2:4 6 = 3 + 3 => 3 x 3 = 9. . . 3 . 3. . . lol... Course 9 + 3 = 12, where 1;2 => + 3 again . . . lol. . . while 1;2 is jsut 1/2 of 2;4 where I started back with the 3 twos . . . 2.2.2. . . . lol...

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Thanks for your Grace Love and wisdom; Please fill me with Your Truth, Strength and Wisdom so I may grow to achieve everything that you have set before me!!!! Thank you, Amen

Thank You Jesus Christ for Creating The Way of Your Word!

What

I guess it's all kinds of craziness again... LOL. . . Still. I hear so much around me all the time that just is weird or funky. Like John finally had his meeting with Chris over the KLD stuff we've been doing with SPSS. And so he brought him over to introduce him to me. And Chris immediately said he knew me... Played tennis with my dad. It was really funny. . . just freaked old john. . . That's happened to John twice now. At a Christmas dinner he freaked with Dr. Ness greeting me so quickly and warmly. "Where you know him from?" . . . lol. . .

It's really weird, reminds me of the engineers at the Health open house. Today when my business plan class team met with Sharon again at lunch, I saw Dr. Kovac walk by again. I just want to laugh since I knew he's in some useless BS beuarocrat job just struggling to stay awake. It's funny I can almost feel when a person is in one of those jobs.

Yes Son, what you are feeling is the familiarity that you have with these people doing things that you have done as well. You try to feel so far above everyone, but you know you've done it too countless times and really are no different than any of them. You are all people in the same boat, all wanting and fighting for the same things. Once you all realize that the best way to really have the things you want is to start sharing them more.

I know, what are you telling me for?

What you need to do it stop fighting everything. You are more able to just be who you are now than ever. You are afraid of doing things that will reveal who you are. Son there is nothing here that you can do that will ever make this anything less for you. You know exactly what you will do and what will happen because you have seen it all countless times. Again and again this vision flys through you. You have seen it all countless times and really already know all the answers. This is nothing for you to fear. Simply allow what you know to flow and be free as you wish it to be.

I know you tell me that every moment

What were you thinking just know then, write it here now:

I saw myself doing a presentation in my class about what I know and see everywhere. Wow, I brought in my video camera and taped it all and I blew myself away. FLashes into the grop meetings too, where i need to do the same thing. But then today there was Chris from my MS class who did a presentation with me before. He did what I told him to do last time. It was really cool, and he did this awesome job. I was just thinking how I would tell the class what I taught him. And I felt jealous, wanting to brag about what I did. . . That I taught him, what I felt about it all.

But that was wrong, why should I be jealous, I should be proud about it and encourage him more. I really should be doing the same thing with Sharon and my other class too. So what if people are naive and never experienced the real world. I've seen all sides of everything and remember all of them. It's really a wild ride for me and I know that I'm barely starting anything yet. . . feeling the vibration of each one of them looking at me again. . .

Wow, so I felt myself riding my bike to school again and working a hundred hours a week getting all kids of crazy things done all over the place. It was really a wild ride and kinda cool. I see these flashes of light. Sorta half dream and have vision. It's a TV projection flashing by me and then I see the blip on the screen of the helicopter I hear outside my window now. LOL . . . everytime I hear one of those I feel the guy freak out about what I flash across his screen. It's just weird that I feel his vibration and reaction to me.

I know that's what I live off of. The vibration and reactions I create in others. It's so cool, and really weird. I always get this vibration and sensation of everyone I encounter. People look up to me in a weird way. I still feel like the new kid on the block, but I know my children are older than some of them. LOL. . . . I mean those wonderful kids could teach so much to these people. My own children. Like Equan, we've spent a few years together and it's been such a tremendous gift to each of us. Like we could do so much together and know we can.

What flashed then!

I saw Bates coming to help me and Equan and seeing all this craziness at my house and investing in it. Just wanting to see what I could do and helping to make it all happen. Then Shawn flashes in again and the deal gets bigger and bigger, now Ron and Scott . . . then sharon and others. Wow, so now I flash into Klasko's office again and "hey dude, I jsut know you can help make this happen, and we would just blow the doors off of this whole place overnight"

Shit I've seen that millions of times before . . .

Yes son you have. What does it make you feel?

I feel like I'm falling into a time warp again. Like another spontanious regression where I feel and reveal deep passions to people where they all can feel it too. And it makes them hungry and desperate to connect for more. It's all really clear and strong for me. Like I told Sharon I was a Shaman talking to animals and shape/shifting. Course she already knew it. LOL. . . but it was so neat to tell her about my chants where the power takes me away and i fill with such powerful visions. . . . then leading and teaching people by encouraging their passions.

I really do that to everyone, it's really kinda funny. Especially the really talented people are the ones that pickup the most and can do the most. LOL . . . course my children! Wow, I've been feeling them a lot lately, i wonder what they are going through. When Chris hits puberty everythings going to blast apart! Course we all know . . . lol . . .

What do you need to do?

I know i need to get back to work and speed read through a bunch of things. Funny when I met DJ and she told me about the mayan dude coming the next day, i read his three bibles that night. Wow, they were bigger than bibles, or at least one was way bigger for sure!

I Love You Dearest Loving Lord Jesus Christ. Please fill me with your Grace love and Wisdom to Fulfill YOUR GLORY! In the Name of Father Son and Holy Ghost Amen.